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Jegsy Scarr

Do you think they should promote WTM in schools more?

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They definitely should, the only time I ever hear about abstinence in school is when we learn about Christian and Muslim views on sex before marriage in Religious Studies. If we only learn about it in religious studies, then naturally everyone assumes that sex before marriage is only for religious people. In biology we learn obviously about the physical side of sex, and apart from that, the message basically is that sex is fine as long as you're legal age (16) and use contraception! It's ridiculous.

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Hey Seeflo and Dodgedude,

I understand exactly where ya'll are coming from. I mean it's hard enough finding a girl waiter but a male waiter????. I always knew in my heart I wanted my husband to have the same amount of sexual experience as me, meaning he better not have gone all the way unsure.gif. Well, ofcourse there are suitors but I just can't get past how far they've gone physically. I will never forget what my FCA Coach in hs said after he married a virgin woman (he was not by a long shot) and encouraged abstinence because he said, "When my wife and I intimately involved we are never truely alone." wt&*^$%!##$@**$$!!! That is sad. Well the reason I brought this up to ya'll is because I've recently met someone whom I'm highly attracted to but he def. is not a waiter but he seems like a pretty awesome person but I'm not sure, inside I think I've given up on finding a male-waiter and may have to accept a non-waiter. I guess as a female waiter knowing I may never meet a male-waiter, since I blew that opportunity with my ex and he's so busy exploring every body he can get his paws on (which is really sad), is if they aren't they better have some kick-a$$ qualities that make up for not waiting.

The last line there OHG should be the only reason why you should give up on demanding a wiater. You didn't blow an oportunity with your ex. Just because he was a virgin does not mean he would have made a good husband. Whereas you may find later down the road a man with all the "Kick-a$$" qualities you want in a man but is not a virgin that may be the best husband in the world.

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yes ComputerFox I think as time has went on I've begun to realize this and you are right I totally agree. I think that just because someone isn't sexually experienced makes them better than someone whose not. It just depends on the circumstances. Like maybe they haven't slep with someone because they aren'e agressive enough to act upon it but really want and are just waiting for the right moment and that's why they still have their v-card or maybe they have but it was in really long term committed relationships like one or two but they are not sexually promiscuous with their bodies. So yeah totally agree with you. ;)

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I definitely think WTM should be promoted as an option but it has to be taught properly (which is a hard thing to do.) However, I don't think that pre-marital sex should be taught as a bad thing, and neither should having a child out of wedlock. When it comes to sex, it should be taught that "safe" sex no longer exists due to the rampant spread of STDs and the fact that a condom doesn't do much to protect you. To me, it is most important to teach students very well about the proper use of birth control, sexually transmitted diseases, the struggles of teenage pregnancy, and how to deal with peer pressure. I really don't think people should be told to have sex before marriage, or not to have sex before marriage. If properly taught - like I was - they will know what they want to do with their bodies without anyone telling them. I think that's best.

This has been my view on sex education for quite some time now. I worked for two years with an at-risk youth program, where many of our students had not one, but two and three children by age 16 or 17. I brought in Planned Parenthood to speak both years, because so many of the students were having unprotected sex with several partners. We actually had a student who had contracted HIV from a boyfriend at age 15. In an environment like that, we as a staff had to be realistic about the resources we provided. Unless you are going to be a nun, priest or monk, then you should have some form of sex education in my opinion. But sex education should be more than just discussions about condoms and stds. By teaching that kind of message, to me it over simplifies sex. People have sex for far more different reasons than just physical release. Think about how many people seek emotional connection through sex or believe that participating in the act makes them a "woman" or a "man" now or think how it improves their self-image. For myself, I see it has a bonding experience that I want to have only with my husband. That alone means to me that sex education is more than wear a condom while inserting A into B to prevent C or D.

Trust, communication, self-love, openness and the end of mixed messages are what I think should be addressed and taught as part of a sex education curriculum. Sex shouldn't be seen as "bad", but people should be informed that there's more to it. Rather you are a waiter or not, I feel that it's important to be aware of that. Sex and money are the top two issues that people will face in relationships and marriage and they are the top reasons that lead to divorce. Wouldn't it be seen as way to improve the divorce rate by providing people with the tools and knowledge that they will need so that they can be better prepared to face these issues as a couple?

Like you said Sophie, people should be taught this vital information so that they can make a decision that's best for them. This is actually how I became not just a waiter, but an informed one. I make it a point to educate myself so that I may be better prepared for marriage, because marriage is too important to me to just go into it with a blindfold on. This may come off as a bit strange, but I'm use to being the odd person in the all the groups I'm in. Lol!

So to actually answer the question, do I think WTM should be taught in schools? Yes, but only if all the options are equally promoted and taught so that you as an individual can make an informed decision on what is best for yourself.

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Like you said Sophie, people should be taught this vital information so that they can make a decision that's best for them. This is actually how I became not just a waiter, but an informed one. I make it a point to educate myself so that I may be better prepared for marriage, because marriage is too important to me to just go into it with a blindfold on. This may come off as a bit strange, but I'm use to being the odd person in the all the groups I'm in. Lol!

So to actually answer the question, do I think WTM should be taught in schools? Yes, but only if all the options are equally promoted and taught so that you as an individual can make an informed decision on what is best for yourself.

I completely agree with you. WTM is obviously not for everyone, especially people who don't want to get married. I know girls who want to be in a lifelong relationship, but refuse to get married because in the olden days - and in many countries today - marrying was merely a form of possessing a woman (making her an object and possession of the husband.) And lots of guys, for biological reasons, tend to have a bizarre fear of marriage and commitment. lol. But they usually grow out of it.

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A proper school should provide sexual education in both viewpoints and let the student decide for his/herself what he/she wants to do. Some don't want to wait and that's fine--others do want to wait, and that's fine too.

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