HopefulPoet

Best Friends?

38 posts in this topic

Yeah that does so promising! How to avoid panicking? Hey you talk to him and then when a more romantic slow number comes on then ask to dance and see if he does anything when you dance. If he doesn't you'll have to tell him at some point!! He might just be thinking 'this is killing me, but she's my friend and clearly isn't making a move so I won't ruin the friendship'.

 

Or... just ply him with drinks and have a drunken night of sex, then pretend you're pregnant and force him to marry you!! :lol::P

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 And how to avoid panicking.

 

Just remember that if he likes you, that means you've already been doing all of the right things just by being yourself and having a good time with him.  :)

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Hahahaha yes clearly, drunken night of sex, my go-to move as a waiter. It's fool proof haha XD

 

And thanks Steadfast! I think I just have to keep reminding myself that feelings aside, I am spending a night with someone I'm super comfortable with and who makes me laugh 24/7, so jitters are pointless. Either it works or it doesn't work, although to be honest I'm more nervous about it actually working than anything else hahaha.

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I really hope that having him at the wedding goes well for you. Sounds like a lot of fun! I hope that spending some time with him will help you decide if you want to tell him how you feel about him. It's been really interesting reading this whole thread and I wish all the best with whatever you feel is right!

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It was a mess but I survived it. I didn't tell him because as soon as he picked me up, he started making sure that the friend line was drawn pretty deeply in the sand, and did everything but stamp "SHE'S SINGLE, FELLAS" on my forehead at the wedding. So. Thank you for all of your help, and I'm glad I did the brave thing and asked him! But I know I'm definitely never going to date him, and that leaves the possibilities endless. I'll just have to stay single and wait for my burly Irish man with as much patience as I can bear haha.

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Oh that's so sad! That's a bit odd he dropped everything and then decided to make it clear... he should have done that before I think. What sort of stuff was he saying at the wedding then? If that's ok to ask? Hey don't worry you did the brave thing! You went for it so well done! And if it's not meant to be then so be it. You'll hopefully find someone better who will be crazy for you :)  Are you still friends with him?

 

Ireland is a small country though, maybe drop the Irish and just keep the burly :lol:  That's a long wait if you're waiting for someone from Ireland to also be burly and turn up in America! (or just go to Dublin in the summer :)) Either way you should be reasonably pleased even if it didn't turn out as you hoped because at least you know where you stand, know you have the courage to initiate and you don't have to waste time wondering. If I see any Irishmen i'll send them your way and relieve them of their Guinness simultaneously ;)

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Of course that's fine to ask haha :) Just stuff like, "Oh, everyone probably thinks we're dating, that's awkward. Like we're /never/ going to date." or "I don't slow dance, you should go find someone else to do that with." and "I almost stayed home to watch Netflix instead of coming." and "They're throwing the bouquet, get up there, you're definitely single!" and "Wow that girl is gorgeous." And he didn't bother to comment on how I looked, even though I got a new dress I adored and put a lot of effort into my hair and make up (He normally sees me in sweatshirts and fuzzy socks haha). I don't think he was intentionally cruel, I don't think he even thought it was a remote possibility that I invited him because I liked him, because he's not the kind of person to be intentionally mean or hurt feelings. But as soon as I got in the car when he picked me up he said, "So they know we're not a thing right? Like they aren't expecting a boyfriend?" and so I knew then that I should probably never mention that I was had any hopes for the night. And it was doubly frustrating because it was worse than being alone at a wedding, because no other guys would even ask me to dance since he was sitting right there. So it was like being painfully single in spite of having a date. And then I got to watch all the couples dance blissfully to my favorite Michael Buble songs haha. It was a night. And I've been to Ireland, I've always wanted to live there, so I'm gonna try to move there one day. But also I love that life is chaotically unexpected, and so I'm looking forward to have my expectations changed and surprised haha. But thank you for the support, all of you! And don't you dare keep the Guinness, it's my favorite hahaha.

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Wow he doesn't do subtle then!! He could have just said something to you once at the start to make it clear where he stood. Sorry it didn't work out. It does sound like he figured it out and was intent on getting his point across. But I would have handled it a different way. Not complimenting you and talking about other girls seems a little cruel. After all he was saying you should have booted him aside to make sure someone would ask you to dance!

 

I'm not a fan of weddings so Guinness would seem extra wonderful at one!! It's good you've been to Ireland if you've got your heart set on an Irishman. It's a great accent! All the best!

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*hugs* Sorry to hear it didn't work out. I can relate - a similar thing happened with my best friend. At least now you know where you guys stand… and that leaves you all the more room for burly Irish guys ;)

 

In any case, you did the brave thing and that's awesome! You can be proud of yourself for that! :)

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Sorry to hear it didn't work out.  :( But you were courageous enough to do what many others would not, and now you can have a nice clean break and move forward with no "what ifs" hanging over your head.

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CrystalFaerie I'm sorry that it happened to you too, I wouldn't wish it on anyone! But life has a way of working out for the better, I always believe that, so this just means our plans and hope and imaginations just couldn't possibly conjure up the reality of what's to come, because it's better than we can conceive or dream. Thank you guys for all of the support! For now I'll just eat ice cream and write my own love interests into a book, they never fail me hahaha.

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Too bad it didn't work out, but at least you took the step to try!

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