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About dulcexox

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  1. I didn't start dating until after college & that was only because my friends & family literally started to freak-out about it. So, I went out with a guy to please them. I wasn't really interested. I'm a nerd & much happier with a book. He was nice & a gentleman. By then, I had a job & my own, so we went dutch on the bill. I think that the best way to get the sort of guy you want is to be the sort of woman that he wants. Most successful guys that I know want a successful woman so that they can be confident in the fact that she's not looking for a paycheck or a free meal. So, I advise my friends to make a list of what they are looking for in a man & to become the things on that list. If you want a successful guy become successful. You want a guy that can cook, learn how to cook, etc. People tend to meet people with similar interests because they frequent similar places. Sophie I don't know where you're at logistically, but I knew guys in high school that had money from their own computer programs. I'm talking about guys with stock options in the millions before they hit 18. So, maybe it's time to look at the local geeks. I was in computer club in high school, so I know what I'm talking about
  2. Tricky! It depends on the individual. I say that because I have had older male mentors tell me not to marry anyone who can't match my income bracket. Apparently, they've seen some women who have married guys that made considerably less, & the guys were really insecure about not being the "providers" in the home. I had a friend that had a hefty income & the house & everything that went with that. She had problems with men who were not secure enough to let her pay when she knew that they couldn't afford to. When they traveled, she footed their bill. She didn't want to stop living life her way to make them more comfortable, but she was more than happy to help them pay. Then again, I know a couple that have been married for over 20yrs & she makes more, & he's fine with that. She gets off later than him, so he cooks & takes care of what he can before she arrives. They have dinner when she gets home & they finish whatever needs to be done around the house together. They have one of the most beautiful relationships & their son turned-out great (polite, in grad-school, & engaged to a great girl). It boils down to his self-assurance & self-esteem. His income bracket isn't a concern. I'm in school so that I can pay my way & help a loved one, if necessary. My concern would be him being comfortable in his own skin no matter what he does or doesn't have, & irrespective of what I've got. That being said, a guy who earns more is always nice, but not necessary.
  3. Would you date/marry a shorter man?

    Absolutely love it.
  4. Would you date/marry a shorter man?

    I'm 5'2", so how much shorter are we talking? I'd really like a guy who could at least carry luggage. Although, if he was a great guy, I hope I would look past the fact that he was shorter than 5'2". Come to think of it, there was a guy I went to the movies with a couple of times, & he was shorter than me. He was funny, smart, & we're still cool. Honestly, if his personality is right, there's a lot of stuff I could overlook.
  5. I've been open to younger & older guys. I've been advised to marry a younger guy by most of the older people I know (male & female), & they've given some pretty valid reasons. So, my bracket is between ten years older (40) & ten years younger (20). I know guys that are mature in that age range, so that's my range.
  6. I would say, "Ask how benevolent I'm feeling after labor & delivery."
  7. Ok, to be perfectly honest, I had considered sleeping around. I don't like commitment. I don't like the idea of being stuck with one individual for the rest of my "natural-born life." Lol. So, my reasons for waiting are varied & complex. 1) I believe in God & that Hell is real. So, that's a pretty big factor for me, but considering that you're atheist, I'll give you the others. 2) I know that I'm not going to be able to separate my emotions from the act the 1st couple of times. I'm sure that I could eventually numb myself enough to make a pretty decent attempt at it & probably even excel at it, since I can be really cold & analytical. But, numbing oneself is never a good idea. 3) The number of people that I know who have caught something out there is enough to make me reach for a chastity belt, no joke. & it doesn't help that I'm in school & the hospital where that stuff becomes even more pronounced, more obvious & more statistical (those numbers don't make me horny, au contraire). 4) Let me tell you about me. I’m the girl who won't even commit to the same cell phone after an upgrade drops! If this ME commits to be with one guy, settle down & commit to marriage, I want it all. Not some “we're almost married.†Or “we don't need a piece of paper to define us.†NO! I want the fairy tale: the wedding with close fam & friends (hopefully no more than 50 peeps, preferably he won't wear a tux & I won't be in a dress that makes me look like frosting. Lol. No dis to those that want that. My friends want the frosted dress & the tux & an amphitheater, & I love them to death.), the fights, the rough times, the good times, & everything in-between...& I want a rock on my finger while we live together, ride together, fight together, etc. I'm a "ride or die" kinda chick, but not without a rock. The biggest commitment that I believe I can make is with my body. I know you're atheist, so this may not hold the same significance for you, but the Bible says that I'm supposed to present my body as a living sacrifice unto God. There's also the old wedding vow that a man would make to his future wife: "With my body I thee worship, and with all my worldly goods I thee endow." So, when I get down with my husband (if I ever get married), I'll be sharing all that I am with him, giving him all that I have & vice versa. Literally! My bank account goes up & down, my clothes change, my address changes, car changes, but my body will always be my body. It's the one thing that will belong to me to freely give & commit to another until I die. So, he's gonna rock me up (not a huge diamond either, cuz that's not realistic in surgery. Preferably, just a gold band), we're gonna rock it out, & it’s going to be a rockin’ good time So, to answer your question, “Yeah, I’m 100% committed to staying down until I get that rock, then we’ll be gettin down"
  8. sex and waiting

    Okay, my rule of thumb is if it can give me an STD, keep it away from me. So, no to anal, vaginal, & oral. Incidences of head & neck cancers associated with HPV are increasing among men & women. Heads-up guys, you can contract HPV by going down on a girl & vice-versa for the ladies! So the same virus that's giving girls cervical cancer is probably causing head & neck cancers in dudes! FYI, there is no such thing as safe sex. As for the passionate kissing, I believe that the CDC found at least one incidence of HIV being contracted through kissing, so I would recommend a flashlight inspection of their dental work before taking a trip to France, just saying. Not to mention the other stuff that can be contracted from kissing: Herpes (occasionally), Mono, Hepatitis, etc. I tell my sexually active & "anything but penetration/vaginal" peeps, that if they're going to go there, they need to Lock It All Up. There are oral prophylactics if oral is what you're into. & when it comes to kissing, be careful who you lock lips with. Do your research on potential kissing buddies, contraception, & STDs...& pleeeease be safe!
  9. What Would you do?

    Honestly, I have no idea. I'm a crack shot though No, seriously, it would be in a guys best interest not to come home. My family is military, LAPD (aunt & uncle), gun-toting cowboys & cowgirls. I'm a girl, but I get 50/50 on target practice. It would just be in his best interest not to come home! Keep going, file for divorce & change his name. Just saying. Love is patient, Love is forgiving, & Love is kind. But, Love ain't my name! So, if he wants to cheat & what-not, he needs to marry love. No, seriously, all kidding aside. I honestly don't know. I have loved people who have wounded me deeply & vice-versa. They have forgiven me, & I have forgiven them. Am I capable of it? Yes. The question is will I be able to get back to a place of trust. It's not even about forgiveness, although, that is a start. I have forgiven people that I have never been able to trust again because they refuse to change. A marriage without trust is a shell of a marriage without a heart. If I we can't rebuild trust, it's over. & I can say from personal experience that it is very hard to rebuild trust after it's been broken, & this was in a relationship where sex wasn't a factor...So, I can't imagine what it would be like in a relationship where that was a factor. It's not something that I want to contemplate. This is really on of those "I'll cross that bridge if I have to, but God I pray I never have to" moments.
  10. Handicapped Children

    I wish you all the best in pursuing your dreams. Glad I could offer some encouragement. We all have those moments. Happy that you weathered the storm
  11. Love!!!

    Yeah, that happens. I've clicked with people, & we've turned-out to be friends for life. & there were other people I met, I just knew that there was something wrong with them...& latter on, it turned-out that there was something wrong. I don't know about love at first sight. But, I do believe in instant connections.
  12. Handicapped Children

    I agree that all kids are children of God & deserve love. Your entire statement sums up my feelings. Except the not being sure about having kids. I'm pretty sure I don't want them. My mom had 13 siblings & my dad had 8. So, I've had plenty of kids in my life. I'm good on the kid front. Lol. As for the true love thing. You don't have to find it. To hear the people that I know that are in true love tell it, Love found them. I'm talking about people just showing up when they weren't looking & had given up. So, if I were you, I wouldn't worry about it. Enjoy being single. There is a certain freedom & beauty that comes with being unattached
  13. It's very looooong! But also very worth it! It's a great article, & I especially like the part that talks about reconnecting sex & emotions after marriage. That's true, I've seen that happen. Once you've made a disconnect like that, it's hard to get it back. For some people, it never really happens again. It's a sad situation.