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About Claudia_case

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  1. Deciding to WTM after already giving it up to my boyfriend

    Thank you and I hope so. I am very confused
  2. So to give you a little background I am in a relationship that has been going strong for a year and a half. I have recently decided that I want to wait until marriage to have sex and I am honestly scared and wondering if it is the right thing to do. I have had sex in multiple relationships previously and my current boyfriend and I have had sex on and off since we started dating. For awhile we were just having oral, which I felt a lot better about than going all out with sex. I have a lot of insecurities with sex because of past relationships and I have been taken advantage of sexually numerous times. Feeling that vulnerable with my body brings out so many insecurities and that is honestly the main reason I have decided to stop doing it until marriage. It got to the point recently before I made this decision, where we would start foreplay and I would have this thought running through my head like, "I probably shouldn't be doing this" and the result was me acting incredibly unenthusiastic during sex. My boyfriend didn't know what I was thinking and thought It was something about him specifically. I mentioned to him one night that I want to stop and he "says" he is completely fine with it. However, I am still worried about how it will all play out and honestly about what it may reveal about his intentions. My boyfriend and I are building a business together and helping each other grow on so many levels emotionally, and we were good friends for about a year before we started dating so I know there is a foundation there other than sex. I know he cares about me so much as a person and is very committed to making it work under any circumstance. My concern is that since we started having sex so soon when we began dating, I wonder if that is a huge reason why he is with me? He expressed his desire for me to initiate sex more a few months ago and it put a ton of pressure on me and I didn't know how to act. I felt like I was disappointing him or not good enough for him if I didn't initiate it or want to do it. I am worried he wants my body more than my mind and heart. Again, this isn't based off of anything he has said, I just can tell he gets turned on pretty easily and anytime we cuddle or he sees me in something "sexy" he wants only one thing. I wonder what happens when you give a guy sex, and then take it away? Will he want it even more now than he would if I had never given it up? Will he seek to fulfill these desires elsewhere? Is it still ok to have oral or should we stop doing everything sexual? So many questions and I honestly don't know what to do. I love him and I don't want to lose intimacy or passion with him because we stop having sex. I am also 22 and in no rush at all to get married. So saying I am waiting until marriage in this relationship, is a huge sacrifice and it could be years. Any insight would be helpful. Thank you