Guest markb4

Guys, how do you break the stereotypes?

34 posts in this topic

Hey guys,

Another question: What is something that you do that breaks the masculine stereotypes?

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Besides WTM?

I don't fight, I'm not aggressive, (thats not to say I don't stand up for myself, but I do believe that diplomacy is better, and theres few things that I care about enough to actually fight over - mainly based around defending others)

I don't watch sports, or really care to watch TV at all, I've never been much of a spectator, and id rather go play the sport.

I'm a gamer (generally associated with the uncool nerd group hah), and I'm smart - nerd/geek whatever, when it comes down to it

There's probably more, but this is what comes off the top of my head hah, and i have to leave for class in a few mins so may post more later if I think of it!

Great question!!

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Well, I'm a quiet and introverted person for starts. I"m not very aggressive. I prefer to be subtle, but direct when I'm doing something (i.e., if someone needed help with something, I would help her, but I wouldn't tell the whole world how great I am or create a scene).

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Hmmm...I mean I would say waiting obviously. And just my general view of relationships and sex I feel like I'm different in that regard than pretty much all guys I know in offline life. But all of us guys here can pretty much say that I think so enough of the obvious. As for other stuff....I mean I'm kind of a typical guy for the most part as far as liking sports, cars, the outdoors, etc. but I do play the piano so maybe that breaks it a little bit :P

Something else I just thought of....I don't if this makes sense but I know many guys that feel like they can't admit when they're wrong or don't know something, etc. It's like its not masculine to say you don't know how to do something or don't know how to fix something or whatever. I'm different; I love picking people's brains about anything and everything and learning new stuff....and on the flipside if you ask me a question I'll tell you everything I know but I won't BS you about the stuff I don't. If that makes any sense...lol

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Something else I just thought of....I don't if this makes sense but I know many guys that feel like they can't admit when they're wrong or don't know something, etc. It's like its not masculine to say you don't know how to do something or don't know how to fix something or whatever. I'm different; I love picking people's brains about anything and everything and learning new stuff....and on the flipside if you ask me a question I'll tell you everything I know but I won't BS you about the stuff I don't. If that makes any sense...lol

makes perfect sense I'm kinda the same way!

I read instruction manuals as well, and don't have a problem asking for directions if I'm lost or unsure of where to go. (last part is kinda rare though I'm part gps hah)

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makes perfect sense I'm kinda the same way!

I read instruction manuals as well, and don't have a problem asking for directions if I'm lost or unsure of where to go. (last part is kinda rare though I'm part gps hah)

Good I'm glad someone does! I too usually at least skim instruction manuals but by the end of whatever I'm doing it's usually in the trash haha. Asking for directions....NEVER!!! Haha just kidding...for the most part :blink: lol!

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..I mean I'm kind of a typical guy for the most part as far as liking sports, cars, the outdoors, etc. but I do play the piano so maybe that breaks it a little bit :P

That's great that you play the piano. Awesome!

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I like that you play the piano DD - I WISH I had learned... and maybe I will take the time to do that still. I've done a lot of things I never thought I would in the last 5 yrs alone - including surfing.

I canNOT understand the love affair you all have with instruction manuals LOLOLOL.

And I HATE asking for directions HAHA.

But... I am an avid shopper and have probably always been a bit of a clothes-horse and admittedly... i have more shoes than my wife (but i work in a classic suit+tie environment... rationalization rationalization); I do the grocery shopping in our household as an added funny; I don't like tools and fixing stuff.

I am however the electronics geek in the house (boys and their toys).

I was never that great at sports as a kid... but somehow managed to turn into a little league coach, an avid soccer fan and of course an NCAA basketball fan. But that's it on the sit-in-front-of-the-TV and watch endless sports things.

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oh - and for added thinking for you guys who are in your twenties... the more you break those stereotypes, the more you tend to be attractive. it shows you have the strength and self-confidence to be who you are and to do what you like :-). Yes... waiting is obviously the tie that binds this group... and it's a perfect demonstration of being who you are, but all the little things I see above... those are really great ways you do what you like and are comfortable doing so. More maturity than I had in my twenties!!

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I think the question for me is what do I do that DOES fit the stereotype? Lol...

I cry in movies...and even at moments that aren't sad (like when Neo kept getting up after being taken down by Agent Smith in The Matrix...what the?)

Music makes me cry.

Yeah, I cry quite a bit ;)

I play violin (and viola and a few other instruments).

I am polite.

I read books.

I enjoy pre-20th Century music, often more than modern music.

Sometimes I worry even myself haha :P

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oh - and for added thinking for you guys who are in your twenties... the more you break those stereotypes, the more you tend to be attractive. it shows you have the strength and self-confidence to be who you are and to do what you like :-). Yes... waiting is obviously the tie that binds this group... and it's a perfect demonstration of being who you are, but all the little things I see above... those are really great ways you do what you like and are comfortable doing so. More maturity than I had in my twenties!!

Totally agree!!!

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But all of us guys here can pretty much say that I think so enough of the obvious. As for other stuff....I mean I'm kind of a typical guy for the most part as far as liking sports, cars, the outdoors, etc. but I

Going off you posts here on the forums Dodgedude you always reminded me of a man's man so I'm not surprised with your interests just sorta struck as that type of guy like the rugged kind just saying lol

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ughhhh fine, I'll bite. 2 things aside from WTM:

1.) Many people would never guess because I'm reserved/shy, which sometimes comes across as cold, but I am a romantic guy.

2.) I would have to say my love for Jane Austen's works. As a kid I would sit by my mom, trying to distract her, as she watched Pride & Prejudice only to find that I had taken a liking to the film myself. Now, I watch Pride & Prejudice every year, with my mom and dad :-)

As an author, Jane Austen's works are classics such as "Sense and Sensibility" and "Pride and Prejudice." I have seen the movie "Pride and Prejudice". I have also watched the movie adaptations for the book "Jane Eyre."

As to your comment about shy/reserved guys being romantic, I want to jump and down and shout, "You go", or something like that. I definitely agree with you there. Shy and reserved guys can also be romantic too! :).

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Ok, my turn now I guess, lol:

1) I don't like sports, nor can sit down and watch a sports game for its entirety.

2) I don't get angry. I get sad often, but not angry.

3) I like musical type-songs/show tunes, etc. Also, I don't hate Justin Bieber, lol!

4) I, like my fellow shy guys above, consider myself romantic or at least dream of romance w/my wife.

Sure that there's more, but can't think of any more.

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Breaking stereotypes huh?

-Obviously there's WTM

-I play football, but I'm a very kind, gentle person

-Love reading novels and writing, most particularly poems and a few songs

-I'm a hopeless romantic, I've cried or atleast teared up during several romantic movies or emotional movie scenes(think 500 Days of Summer, Dear John, Notebook, Walk to Remember and even movies like John Q, Seven Pounds)

-I...actually care about my grades, in my experience it's normally females that take more pride in this

-I try not to curse, I'm not perfect but I try not too

-I like to dress well and do care about my appearance

That's all that come to mind

Good job tho men, let's keep breaking the mold! lol

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You guys are so cute!! Nah, I don't mean that in a degrading way; it just melts my heart when I see that guys are capable of breaking the usual masculine stereotypes, which I don't find entirely attractive anyway. =D

*sigh* There should be more guys like you where I live. Alternatively, I should probably just get out more. XD

Just a question... how do you guys feel about the stereotypes?

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My dad once told me he used to get into fights a lot and got beat up several times. He then added "with my sister." lol. My dad defies most male stereotypes, except that he loves doing athletics. But not so much watching them except tennis and occasionally hockey. Oh, he is super emotionally distant. lol.

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"Just a question... how do you guys feel about the stereotypes?" - Leng

Well, in terms of the stereotypes affecting me, I try not to let that bother me. I mean, I know I have some of the stereotypes (protector, a little athletic, logical thinker etc..). Although, I also realize that I don't really possess the other stereotypes (loud, extroverted etc..). When I was in college, I thought that something was wrong with me because I wasn't extroverted or loud (compared to some of my other male colleagues). However, I realized that the traits that I possessed are just part of my personality (I read a psychology book on introversion/extroversion, thank you psychology!). Now, I try to accept my personality for whatever it is worth. Honestly, it took me a long time to feel comfortable with being comfortable with myself (if that makes any sense whatsoever).

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Stereotypes I break:

  • I'm waiting till marriage
  • I actually want commitment in a relationship
  • I'm pretty open about my emotions and consider myself more sensitive than most guys
  • I hate beer
  • I ask for directions
  • I'm physically weaker than the average guy
  • I do better in artsy subjects like English than science or math

Stereotypes I perpetuate

  • I love shooting guns
  • I'm a huge gamer
  • I love technology
  • I think about sex. A lot
  • I am a proud meat eater

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3) I like musical type-songs/show tunes, etc. Also, I don't hate Justin Bieber, lol!

You had me at show tunes. But lost me at Biebs. I'm a crotchety old curmudgeon, and the music of today's youth is as perplexing and unwelcome to me as the collection of frisbees on my roof.

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You had me at show tunes. But lost me at Biebs. I'm a crotchety old curmudgeon, and the music of today's youth is as perplexing and unwelcome to me as the collection of frisbees on my roof.

Lol, we may differ about Bieber, but I guess we agree about vaudevillian songs, Dean Martin Show-type songs, and Disney and other musicals.

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Lol, we may differ about Bieber, but I guess we agree about vaudevillian songs, Dean Martin Show-type songs, and Disney and other musicals.

Too bad we can't organize a WUM community theater. Should the opportunity present itself, I call dibs on the role of Audrey II in a production of Little Shop of Horrors. :D

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Um...okay, so I actually do my best to ascend to the male stereotypes. The good ones, anyway. I like how VInce organized his so...

Stereotypes I break:

  • I'm waiting till marriage
  • I actually want commitment in a relationship
  • I don't like heavy rock
  • I think motorcycles are dangerous
  • I'm somewhat open about my emotions
  • I don't drink/smoke/cuss
  • I ask for directions
  • I play piano, though not well
  • I clean house and shop for groceries
  • I'm constantly chivalrous, getting doors and saying "Ladies first."
  • I don't get women

Stereotypes I perpetuate

  • I lift weights and work out. (I'm not ripped or a model, but I'm fit and strong)
  • I'm tall
  • I'm running a 5K this weekend
  • I've taken martial arts classes
  • I carry at least one firearm as often as possible; but I teach others how too, mostly women
  • I like meat
  • "Brute force" is still an option for stubborn doors/windows
  • I can do home improvement work
  • I don't "get" women

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