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Dating Sites

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I've used eharmony and okcupid. I didn't use them use them, just joined them to see what dating sites were like. And back when I joined them, I wasn't ready to date in any way, and I'm still not years later.

I joined eharmony first, and one guy did start the icebreaker feature the site has with me, but since I wasn't a paying member, I could only complete a little bit of the icebreaker feature. But I was under the impression that if a paying member started the icebreaker with you, you would be able to complete it and even message that member afterward. But I guess I just misunderstood the FAQ. So I just disabled my account after I found out I couldn't go any further. 

I did try to reactivate my account sometime after that because the site was having a free communication weekend (though I think I missed at least half of it by the time I found out). I had to redo the personality quiz, I completed it, but the site had to do something like reverify my account before I could do anything on the site, but it never did. So I just deactivated again after days or weeks or whatever of waiting for it to finish, and I haven't touched it since and never will.


And then there's okcupid, which was way better. I liked how all the basics were free, and only special features like seeing who liked your profile cost money. And I really liked the match questions. There were questions you could answer about important or more mundane stuff. And your match percentage with another user was based on how both of you answered the question. And if you were a paying member, you could even search users by how they answered questions.

Though just because you had a high percentage match with someone, it didn't mean that they answered the important questions or answered them the same as you. There'd be high ones for me, but they'd only answered a few, or there'd be ones where they really only answered the unimportant ones and little to none of the ones about more serious topics. Or there's be ones where they'd answered the unimportant ones the same as me, but then their answers for important ones were the complete opposite of mine. Or they answered the WTM question and it said they were WTM, but answers to other sex-related questions showed that they had an average/high sex drive and/or interest in types of sex I don't want, so it'd be a complete turn-off. 

I loved the whole match question thing and how match percentages were based on it, but I'd actually had to look at how they answered things because a high percentage didn't mean much. 

I was on the site, but I never sent a message to anyone or liked a profile, and only sent a couple of replies. 

The match questions were cool cause you could see other people's opinions on a topic that was important to you without messaging them, if they had answered them and had their answer public. Like I said earlier, I wasn't looking for anything, just checking the site out. Besides, there was no one interesting there, at least based on their profile. Maybe some people there would actually be my type or at least close to it, or maybe they'd make a good friend, but nothing I've seen or read there sparked any kind of interest in me. I have deactivated and reactivated my account several times, but I deleted it a few months ago cause I don't want to date and don't need to keep a profile up that most users wouldn't see anyway because I never put up a profile picture.

I liked okcupid and I would recommend it, but they changed the site two years ago. Now you can't do much for free. Like you can't even read a message someone sent you unless you both liked each other's profiles, though I think that applies to both free and paid members. Probably still a better dating site than others though.


 I also joined some kind of celibate dating site one time. It was a branching community on some dating site that had different communities and you could join a couple of them on one account. I don't think the celibate page was very active though, and I didn't really do anything on the site, so it doesn't matter anyway. I looked in my inbox to find the name of the site, and the site's called Celibate Passions, with the other communities called *blank* Passions. My account's still up too. :P


I'm not really a dating site person, but for recommendations, I'd say just use whatever sites or apps that are currently most popular. The more active members, the better chance there's someone your type on there.


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A lot of sites use The Dating Lab's database (or powered by it) so you have access to a large amount of potential people from other sites. I registered on "DatingSA" which was also run from this database. All of the sites are similar. Except visual colour schemes differ between them. It would calculate your best matches based on your profile. I would recommend looking for one of these sites. Funny enough in the end of the day I met my wife on a very cheesy iffy dating site (local to South Africa) where I actually least expected her to be. Because we had such success with that particular site, my MIL now created a profile for herself there LOL. 

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