RosatohisCecil

I'm back from hiatus

14 posts in this topic

Soooooo I'm not exactly new, but I have returned after a long absence and here is why:

Some veterans may remember me as the borderline asexual one wondering if it was even really a decision to wait if I was probably just gonna wait anyways cause I had no interest in sex...

weeeeelll....

 

That completely went upside down after I was diagnosed with bipolar and my sex drive got hit by a truck. I have to deal with a lot of issues regarding hypersexuality. It is someone turned on a switch and now I am insatiable, especially when I'm manic, however, I have to keep reminding myself that I am not clear in the head when I do that and just walk it out. To be honest, I was kind of jaded for a while about waiting until marriage after learning my parents didn't and learning that my classmates got married as soon as they can just so they could have guiltless sex and now they are miserable. My bf is still dedicated toward waiting and refused to have sex with me, especially when I was going through a hypomanic episode and besides, we both live with our parents so it is kind of awkward already. 

 

I am still together with my geeky bf of almost 4 years and we are still waiting, but it is more waiting for marriage than waiting till marriage since i need to save up to move out of my parent's house and get my certifications now that I'm almost done with college. It will be worth it though, if I stick to our plan, we will have a good foundation financially and I will be well on my way career wise. Besides, he is worth it. 

 

It's great to be back, is this forum still active? 

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Welcome back, nice to meet you! Glad you and your bf are still strong enough to say no through out all that.

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I am still together with my geeky bf of almost 4 years and we are still waiting

OMG... I think I can't resist so far. That's why I never got a real gf

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4 minutes ago, Abdur Rehman Khan Durrani said:

OMG... I think I can't resist so far. That's I never got a true gf

Eh, what I do is focus on what you CAN do rather than on what you CAN'T do

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8 minutes ago, Abdur Rehman Khan Durrani said:

OMG... I think I can't resist so far. That's I never got a true gf

Eh, what I do is focus on what you CAN do rather than on what you CAN'T do

I'm without a gf in my 21 years life. Though I like a girl but I never spoke to her a word since when I was 12. #Silentlove

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are you scared of talking to her? Are you afraid of rejection? 

Afraid of rejection. but there are many other reasons too. For example, I live in a society where it is not easy to talk to the girl of my age. Another reason is that she was engaged in her childhood. I'm too shy to talk to her though I tried several time.

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15 hours ago, redgrapes said:

Welcome back to the forum, RC! :)

Thanks Grapes, I have chatted with you a lot and you sound like a really good friend! 

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10 hours ago, Abdur Rehman Khan Durrani said:

Afraid of rejection. but there are many other reasons too. For example, I live in a society where it is not easy to talk to the girl of my age. Another reason is that she was engaged in her childhood. I'm too shy to talk to her though I tried several time.

I hear you. My dad is an immigrant from North Africa and needless to say, I can understand what you mean about living in a society where just communicating with the opposite sex is very difficult. I visited my family over there enough to know the challenges.

As fare as rejection goes, here’s how I look at it. There is someone for everyone.  We all have our preferences on what we want in a partner…If a girl rejects me ( which happened more times than I can count, when I was in college haha :P ) that’s ok because it’s no different than me wanting to date a girl who does not have my preferences. So it’s not personal, just not compatible.  It’s good news because you have eliminated a possible match and are now one step closer.  

If you don't try your best, you will eventually end up regretting it. However, if you give it your best and it turns out she is not the one for you, then you will have nothing to doubt or regret. You don’t want to get to a point in life and ask yourself “Whatever would have happened if I just told her how I felt?” You can’t go back in time to find out. That my friend is something you will regret. For sure. Keep trying!

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6 hours ago, RosatohisCecil said:

Thanks Grapes, I have chatted with you a lot and you sound like a really good friend! 

Thank you!! :D I feel exactly the same way about you, RC! ^_^

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21 minutes ago, redgrapes said:

Thank you!! :D I feel exactly the same way about you, RC! ^_^

totes, I'm glad you think the same way, hopefully we can keep chatting 

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Thanks for sharing @RosatohisCecil. I thought bipolarism would be diagnosed rather early but a little googling educated me. Strange that it would affect your sex drive so drastically.  A while ago I read a theory that (at least some forms) bipolarism may originate out of early childhood conditioning e.g child does X and is praised; child does X again at some point and is punished resulting in an association between positive-and-negative emotional states and the passing of time rather than an action and its consequence. I wish you all the best :) 

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