ChildOfTheOneTrueKing

My Virginity as a Punchline

6 posts in this topic

So I’m closing in on my being one year on this site and I feel like I haven’t gained much insight on waiting by being here (hence my long periods of absence and lack of posting), which is partly my fault. When I first joined this online community, I was enthusiastic about other waiters (still am); however, I just lost touch with constantly logging on to see what’s new and such. But due to recent experiences, I have rekindled the flame of motivation when it comes to waiting, which I hope will spark or re-spark others’ hope and motivation in waiting. Feel free to agree to disagree with me on anything I mention. I’ll respect you if you respect me.

 

I just finished a semester of physics (smashed into a 6-week session), which was one of the hardest things I’ve ever have to learn (I hate physics). Because I was struggling so much in class, I was forced to make friends quickly with my classmates so I could pass with an A. I grew really close to three people, which I am thankful. Becoming close with others (especially since we’re a group of college students), the topic of sex was unavoidable. My new friends were two gay men and a girl who lost her virginity at 14. Each had a long list of sexual partners at their very young age. When it was my turn to talk about my experience, I unashamedly told them I am waiting till marriage (that is if I do get married; I have plans for discerning for consecrated life if I don’t). They all looked at me in shock, the how-are-you-still-a-virgin face. It eludes me how as a society we have come to a time where being a virgin is considered taboo or abnormal. I then realized how rare it is to be a virgin and that is a true blessing in my perspective. Why be ashamed of being special? Why do I have to conform to society’s new standard? Which simply answered, I don’t.

 

Many of the people I encountered through college (I’ll be graduating next May, definitely need your prayers) have lost their virginity premaritally, like 95% (again, of the people I’ve encountered). I have a classmate who had sex, his partner became pregnant, they were forced to marry for the child’s sake, and are in the process of divorce. His only response was “we married too young.†I encountered a patient after she gave birth. She was 24, had 8 sexual partners, and requested for a DNA test for her newborn. My new group of friends spoke about their sexual encounters as sport and revenge. Another mentioning sex actually isn’t that great. A new classmate I met today who is struggling to finish school impregnated a girl and his son will be born any time soon. My gay friend was once married to a girl only because she told him she was pregnant (which she faked for 9 months). Then they both cheated on each other for revenge. The two completed the divorce process after years of court cases. Then we come to the people who are all about sex, but are too embarrassed to talk about it (well maybe you shouldn’t be doing it if you can’t even talk about it). The issue is that they are all missing the point of sex when it is between a loving, married couple. Sex doesn’t define your marriage. In my very first post, I mentioned how sex is God-given and how it is the most vulnerable state (physically and emotionally) when you are in marriage. Regardless of my religious beliefs (and reviewing simple biology), sex is to reproduce. They is no reason to have sex outside of marriage if you do not plan to be growing a family. Obviously sex is a sensitive topic which brings about other issues such as abortion. Don’t have sex if you don’t want children. Simple. Obviously I’m not accounting for rape cases. It kills me to see married couples who are unable to have children of their own, yet many women have abortions with no issue. It’s a tragedy.

 

And the last note. If you’re waiting, you’re labeled as “prudeâ€, which is ridiculous because we have high standards for ourselves. Moreover, we are strong-willed people, which others simply dismiss. People use sex as temporary self-gratification until they can get their next fill. It’s selfish and there’s no love in that. So yes, people use my virginity as a punchline, but I’m a rarity and there are bigger plans out there for me than I can ever imagine. I live for Him. I will not lose sight on my purity for anyone.

6 people like this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Insight that's a good word.

 

Reading what you've written I'm starting to get insight on this idea about being "a prude."

I'm not saying it's good or bad but I'm getting some insight to it.

 

I have this theory that someone trying to remain a virgin while dating someone who isn't willing to wait is called a prude because the assumption is that you date someone because you do in fact like them. So when you like someone and aren't willing to give them what they consider the ultimate affection (while liking them) they label you as a prude or perhaps "selfish" which might be short sighted because they themselves are selfish for demanding it from you...

 

Well thanks for sharing your story, it's given me some insight.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I enjoyed reading your post, it simply showed how you preserved yourself in the middle of all those you mentioned struggling in their cheatings and lies following the fake feelings of happiness without being really happy or living a real love stroy ...  being a virgin is a rare quality that only few knows the value, so dont bother yourself about what the others may call you or the way they may look at you, the most important thing that you are a winner so enjoy living as one and keep your head up :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Sometimes i wonder whatever happened to love?...As i read all the experiences of the people around you i keep asking God why is this happening...i feel hurt and sorry for the majority of the people around us. It saddens me to see so many of my friends who go through the same thing. I guess like you said...there must be a purpose for the minorities like us and God will reveal that to us in due time. Thanks for sharing childoftheonetrueking.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

1 Corinthians 6:9-11New King James Version (NKJV)

Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals,[a] nor sodomites, 10 nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God. 11 And such were some of you. But you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus and by the Spirit of our God.

Fornicator:  n. An unmarried person who engages in sexual intercourse.

Keep up the good work OP!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Reading through your listing of all these consequences people faced reminded me of a proverb (Proverbs 14:34) "Righteousness exalteth a nation: but sin is a reproach to any people."

So many problems in this world could be prevented if people would wait till marriage and be faithful to their spouse.

Virginity shouldn't be a punchline, but the joke is definitely on them and they don't even know it. ;) 

1 person likes this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!


Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.


Sign In Now