sheris

Response in gift giving

6 posts in this topic

A question for the guys, I want to know in case of next time.

It was my mum that said "if someone cares about you enough to buy you a gift, you should accept with a smile and say thank you, don't complain" and when I got a gift I wouldn't use she said "why did you accept it in the first place? how can you say you truly appreciate a gift (e.g cloths) if you are not going to use it(i:e wear it)," and am thinking err! not this one.

My question is if you buy a girl a gift and she didn't like it, would you prefer she said oh its perfect! even though she didn't like it or tell you she didn't like them in the nicest way possible? I would really prefer if the later was OK, to avoid future mistake.

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When I get a gift, I always politely thank the giver. There is no reason to say whether you really want or need it.

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Thanks for your replies. I do appreciate gifts without complains, I just taught if I got one I don't like again it might be good to explain that its not my style or something so it doesn't happen again..... I asked here because i already don't find it hard to tell my girlfriends I don't like something they bought , even for themselves(talk about minding peoples business),because i want them to do the same to me but it just doesn't seem like its ever going to be okay with the opposite gender. No I don't accept gift from everybody, but when i do from those i do and i don't like it?..... the other day i was waiting for a friend and she was taking too long so i decided to enter a store, there a lady came in to return a dress her fiancé bought for her cos she didn't like it(here i know she went too far) and it was too expensive, she dnt see why he should spend such an amount on a dress she wouldn't be wearing, and the women there called her an ingrate, not to her face though, after she had left. They said she wouldn't be getting a gift from him again whether she realise it or not(they probably spoke from experience). Well if it was me I would like that somebody is helping me not waste money. I've heard women say men don't like to be told that they didn't buy the right thing, its why I asked but after all I think i know the answer. JUST APPRECIATE with no comment to whether you don't like it.

.....about the size of gifts, it is the giver and the reason behind the giving that i usually concern my self with, not the size.

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Dear Erenisch

I saw on the dofantasyforum fernando says he based one of his comic on your birthday gift. Did you write the confiscated twin series too?

here the

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I'm appreciative of gifts I get but I don't like it when they press me for more - e.g. do you love it? Because I don't want to lie but I also don't want to disappoint them or come off as rude. Maybe I should adopt the cultural element of not opening someone's gift in front of them....but I guess they'd expect some kind of response later...

 

Now if this was a serious (potentially romantic) relationship then I would be more likely to (while being very appreciative of the thought) disclose my reservations (and any tips) so that future gift-giving is more enjoyable and rewarding for both parties involved. If the receiver isn't interested in your genuine thoughts on a serious gift then they've destroyed the whole point of gift-giving and is rather a selfish attitude - "I'm going to give this expensive gift because it will boost my ego. I don't really care if they will be burdened in whatever way by it". No point going through life thinking my wife LOVES pink flowers and buying them for her when she hates 'em or would prefer white ones!

 

I'm not very comfortable with gift-giving since I really want it to either be useful or liked by the receiver and not create any kind of burden (or feeling of guilt) hence requiring a degree of research. I'm hoping that through genuine discussion with a partner our gift-giving can continuously improve. But it isn't something that is really talked about socially or even among friends. Maybe we should get the ball rolling by enquiring what kind of gifts they like/dislike! Who knows, they might ask us then.....

 

 

In my opinion you never want to give anyone the wrong idea and make them think they can buy you -- that's both not fair to them and it's degrading to yourself. 

 

Ugh, "rinsing guys"....not a nice thing. Doesn't have to be in regard to gifts though. I know a girl who uses her charms to manipulate guys into doing things for her. It's kinda funny observing her reaction when you don't play along.

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