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Are all men primitive?

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What do you think about the notion, that every man (well.....let´s say every heterosexual man) is primitive?

 

No matter how intelligent, sophisticated, respectful or eloquent they are, somewhere deep inside, every man is dirty, fancies tits, hot asses and lots of sex.

Sorry for the blunt choice of words. But that´s exactly what I keep hearing.

 

So, I´m just wondering out of curiosity.

Do you think that´s also true for you guys?

Do you consider yourself primitive? Would you even name it "primitive"?

 

Hence, would you say the main difference between a non-waiter guy and a waiter guy is simply the different handling when it comes to sex, although the feelings regarding sex and women are the same for all men, because you know.....men are just men?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Well, I shower regularly, but I do like boobs, butts, and would prefer lots of sex (though quality beats quantity). But seeing that I am that way because being that way helped our species survive, and being that we (humans) are the owners of the most powerful brains on Earth, and since technically we're just as evolved as every other living species, I don't consider myself primitive. But I guess you'd need to define what you mean by primitive, since there are a bunch of definitions.

 

I wouldn't say all men have the same feelings regarding sex and women, and waiting may be just one of many things that might signify a difference. Even in waiters, there are different reasons for waiting and likewise different feelings towards women and sex among straight male waiters.

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Thanks for your answer.

 

 

Well, I shower regularly, but I do like boobs, butts, and would prefer lots of sex (though quality beats quantity). But seeing that I am that way because being that way helped our species survive, and being that we (humans) are the owners of the most powerful brains on Earth, and since technically we're just as evolved as every other living species, I don't consider myself primitive. But I guess you'd need to define what you mean by primitive, since there are a bunch of definitions..

 

Well, I don´t know. It´s not me, who said men are primitive. It´s just what everyone else is saying.

I understand it as a word for being simple, plain, homely or if you want to take it a bit further: archaic, not cultivated.

 

Like you, I don´t really understand why someone would say that, regarding that humans are very evolved (they´ve come a long way).

 

I think, that men (and women too) can be pretty archaic or primitive. Especially when it comes to something that natural like attraction to the opposite sex and the desire to have sex.

I think that´s fine and without it the human race wouldn´t exist.

 

But sometimes it seems that people reduce themselves to those archaic urges and I hear many men say: "Well, men are primitive. We can´t do anything about it. It´s just the way we are".

 

So I only wanted to see what you guys are thinking about this and if you consider yourself primitive.

But maybe I´m the only one who hears that stuff on a regular basis and it´s now a weird question for you.

 

 

I wouldn't say all men have the same feelings regarding sex and women, and waiting may be just one of many things that might signify a difference. Even in waiters, there are different reasons for waiting and likewise different feelings towards women and sex among straight male waiters.

 

Yes. I agree.

Well, I hope so at least, that not everyone has the same feelings regarding sex and women.

 

 


 

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Eh, base attraction is different for men and women. Men are wired to be primarily visual, so the physical aspect is what catches our attention first. I don't really think it's 'primitive', it's just how how we're built.

On the other hand, women's base attraction tends to be a little more complex. Physical appearance matters to women as well, but there are other things that factor into it. How men are wired may be considered 'primitive' by comparison, but I just look at it as both genders being wired to find different things desirable in a mate.

NOTE: When I say 'base attraction', I'm taking about the things that naturally catch someone's attention outside of your morals/beliefs/values etc.

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primitive adjective;

 

relating to, denoting, or preserving the character of an early stage in the evolutionary or historical development of something.

 

 

If we go by the dictionary's definition, yes men are primitive because it's natural part of human development since our species existed. That really is just how we are. We are designed to intensely desire a woman's body. I would even say it's a big biological incentive for human males to seek after and pursue females. Of course there are other important factors like personality and beliefs. But a big reason why guys pursue girls is because we want to sleep with them...eventually anyways. lol. Some girls make fun of or even look down on guys for being horndogs. Well some guys deserve that if they view women as pieces of meat. But in and of itself, it isn't a bad thing. In fact it is a very good and necessary thing. Would you rather he didn't desire you physically?

 

But if you define it as someone who is uncivilized, unintelligent, archaic, then I would say it only applies if sex is the only thing on a a guy's mind and he only thinks with his penis. The real big difference between a primitive man and one who is not is how he handles sex and women.

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I agree with you Vince. The best was when you compared a primitive man to one who is not.

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Eh, base attraction is different for men and women. Men are wired to be primarily visual, so the physical aspect is what catches our attention first. I don't really think it's 'primitive', it's just how how we're built.

On the other hand, women's base attraction tends to be a little more complex. Physical appearance matters to women as well, but there are other things that factor into it. How men are wired may be considered 'primitive' by comparison, but I just look at it as both genders being wired to find different things desirable in a mate.

NOTE: When I say 'base attraction', I'm taking about the things that naturally catch someone's attention outside of your morals/beliefs/values etc.

 

I agree. Thanks for your input.

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If we go by the dictionary's definition, yes men are primitive because it's natural part of human development since our species existed. That really is just how we are. We are designed to intensely desire a woman's body. I would even say it's a big biological incentive for human males to seek after and pursue females. Of course there are other important factors like personality and beliefs. But a big reason why guys pursue girls is because we want to sleep with them...eventually anyways. lol. Some girls make fun of or even look down on guys for being horndogs. Well some guys deserve that if they view women as pieces of meat. But in and of itself, it isn't a bad thing. In fact it is a very good and necessary thing.

 

That´s what I am thinking, too.

 

 

Would you rather he didn't desire you physically?

 

Ehh, no!?

I never said that. So I´m not sure why you would think that.

 

 

But if you define it as someone who is uncivilized, unintelligent, archaic, then I would say it only applies if sex is the only thing on a a guy's mind and he only thinks with his penis.

 

I also looked it up in a dictionary and that was what I´ve found out.

I never used the word "unintelligent", though. But you can surely add it and associate it with the word "primitive".

 

I have the feeling, that we are talking at cross-purposes.

I never said, primitive instincts are bad. I didn´t rate it as something inherently negative. Quite the contrary. It´s how you handle it, that matters. Thought I made it clear in my second post :unsure:

And again: It´s not me, who came up with the word "primitive". It´s what I hear permanently. So I just wanted to ask, what you guys think about it and if you would also use that word.

 

 

The real big difference between a primitive man and one who is not is how he handles sex and women.

 

That´s exactly my point or rather my "thesis", I assumed in my question-post.

Aaahhhh.......well. I think, apparently I didn´t make it quite clearly, what I mean.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts, anyway.

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I wouldn't say that all men are this way , maybe 99 percent but not all men, for me she must have a beautiful soul capable of agape love , I wouldn't settle for anything less or the will get bored very quickly with her

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To be honest, I love all boobs,asses (big and small :P )and lots of sex too. I have a raging sex drive so its in overdrive for me.. ;) ...But i think what differentiates a waiter from a non waiter guy is self control. Each of us have our reasons for waiting whether it may be religious or scientific but our ability to say no and keep to what we believe in spite of our primal urges is what makes us humans different from animals. I would also like to add that sometimes us men have to be in primitive mode when the time in right like when we make love to our wives and not at other times... :D          

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hahaha...this is so funny.

 

Well, I wouldn't say it's primitive for men to like boobs and asses!  It is natural and necessary for us to be attracted to the opposite sex! So...men SHOULD be attracted to boobs and asses! I certainly hope my boyfriend/husband finds me physically attractive! Just as WOMEN should also be attracted PHYSICALLY to men!  I mean come on! I know I love a guy with a nice butt....among other things! So what? hahaha!  BUT what makes it not primitive is that we as humans are not ruled by our urges!!  Sex for us has a more sophisticated meaning.  Evolved men and women know about self-control, they respect and revere the act of sex and all it signifies and we respect our fellow human beings.  So, it is good and natural to be attracted to the opposite sex! It's only primitive if we treat the other like objects!  There is nothing wrong with noticing a member of the opposite sex is attractive....it only becomes wrong if we go overboard fantasizing about all the things we want to do to them...making cat-calls, throwing ourselves inappropriately at them, speaking about them in a degrading way, violating their space, stuff like that!   Nothing wrong with feeling attraction though!! Okay? Hope that clears this up!

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hahaha...this is so funny.

 

Well, I wouldn't say it's primitive for men to like boobs and asses!  It is natural and necessary for us to be attracted to the opposite sex! So...men SHOULD be attracted to boobs and asses! I certainly hope my boyfriend/husband finds me physically attractive! Just as WOMEN should also be attracted PHYSICALLY to men!  I mean come on! I know I love a guy with a nice butt....among other things! So what? hahaha!  BUT what makes it not primitive is that we as humans are not ruled by our urges!!  Sex for us has a more sophisticated meaning.  Evolved men and women know about self-control, they respect and revere the act of sex and all it signifies and we respect our fellow human beings.  So, it is good and natural to be attracted to the opposite sex! It's only primitive if we treat the other like objects!  There is nothing wrong with noticing a member of the opposite sex is attractive....it only becomes wrong if we go overboard fantasizing about all the things we want to do to them...making cat-calls, throwing ourselves inappropriately at them, speaking about them in a degrading way, violating their space, stuff like that!   Nothing wrong with feeling attraction though!! Okay? Hope that clears this up!

 

Not sure, if your post is specifically directed to me.

I agree with everything you say.

I never thought that pysical attraction is bad and of course there is nothing wrong with feeling attraction. Quite the contrary. It is important, good and necessary.

I don´t know.....I think I get highly misunderstood here and worded my question in a bad way.

I thought I cleared things up in my two other posts in this thread. Written communication can be so hard sometimes....

Thanks for your answer anyway ^_^

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Just to make it clear, because I think it´s not really clear what I meant with my question:

 

1) I don´t think physical attraction is bad or wrong! How could someone think that it is bad or wrong?

If my man likes my boobs and ass and thinks I´m sexy: Hurray! Awesome!

If I think he´s the sexiest man around and I feel a strong physical attraction: Awesome!

 

2) I know it was a weird question and I probably failed to make it clearer. I had a hard time putting it into words. Maybe I shouldn´t even have asked that question. I feel kind of misunderstood.

 

3) I was just wondering if the word "primitive", just the word, would be a word you would also use to describe yourself.

That´s it.

 

Of course, men and women have primitve traits and natural instincts. That´s good and necessary to survival and making babies and having an exciting sex life. Haha.

And yes, men and women are wired differently and need different stimuli to be attracted or to feel sexually aroused.

It´s simply human. I don´t question that.

 

I heard it one too many times how guys say: "Oh well, men are just primitive" and it made me think about it and I was wondering if you would describe yourself like that as well.

 

Conclusion:

I really don´t want you guys to think that I believe physical attraction or primal instincts like the desire to have sex for example, are bad or wrong!

NO!

That´s so not what I am about! Quite the contrary!

Sorry for the weird question and thank you so much for your answers so far. I really do appreciate you taking the time to write things down. Thanks ^_^

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What do you think about the notion, that every man (well.....let´s say every heterosexual man) is primitive?

 

No matter how intelligent, sophisticated, respectful or eloquent they are, somewhere deep inside, every man is dirty, fancies tits, hot asses and lots of sex.

Sorry for the blunt choice of words. But that´s exactly what I keep hearing.

 

So, I´m just wondering out of curiosity.

Do you think that´s also true for you guys?

Do you consider yourself primitive? Would you even name it "primitive"?

 

Hence, would you say the main difference between a non-waiter guy and a waiter guy is simply the different handling when it comes to sex, although the feelings regarding sex and women are the same for all men, because you know.....men are just men?

(Sorry in advance for how long-ass this answer is lol) 

I would say that within almost every human being are a complex web of primitive urges and instincts, that are then modified and fine-tuned by more evolved instincts or socialised behaviours. We have layers and layers to us. Often the primitive instincts will jump first, then the more evolved instincts will correct it milliseconds later, and finally the socialised/learned functions kick in after that. Apparently, when we drop our index finger alone, the first part of the operation is to close all fingers, then milliseconds later another operation reopens the other three fingers. All this happens in the brain before the hand even starts to close all the fingers together, so we just see the one finger close/drop.

But yeah, within the majority of people, men have the urge for titties and ass and vaginas and pretty faces, and women have the urge for penis and muscles and handsome faces, and sometimes asses too, among other things. We are intelligent, sentient and self-aware beings and we more than our base instincts, but we cannot deny the effect they have on our society and our daily lives. Just because I don't express my sexuality publicly or often, doesn't mean I don't eventually want sex with my wife or think about sex. And the same goes for other people too. This is the tool we've been given by God(s) and/or evolution and the universe to continue our species, and it makes sense that it would also be pleasing to most people, or we probably wouldn't bother with it so much.

 

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These men who are "just men" aren't usually having sex with each other. They're usually having sex with women who are "just women," and who are also enjoying it just as much. There are some differences hardwired into our brains, but we're not so different. With men, one big difference is that they they have more of a natural need for sex, and we see this most in jails or with homeless men, men being the majority of the homeless. A lot of these guys will do sexual things for each other, even if they're straight, just to stave off the blue balls. It's really quite sad when you see documentaries about it. I've not really heard of such a thing happening with women. There's also the difference in attraction between men and women, which I went into detail about on another post recently:

 

Women deem 80% of guys less-than-average attractiveness, meaning 80% guys unlikely to get laid when they want it. Men deem women 50% above-average attractiveness, meaning 50% women are likely to get laid when they want it. Women are less likely to have sex with any random guys and have more decisions and power when it comes to (non-rape) sexual encounters. This means men are less likely to have sex when they want it and so are more willing when it becomes available, thus lowering the value of their sexuality. Women can walk into a bar, offer sex and get a bunch of men jumping at the chance. You'd be hard pressed to find a man who can succeed vice versa.

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Personally, I'm a person with a lot of control over my primitive urges, but I also don't keep a tight grip on them. I like just going with the flow, but I don't let that come in front of important stuff, just mainly in free time. I make sure my responsibilities are taken care of, and then I relax and let my mind wander where it will next xD sometimes that's to games and drawing and nerdy stuff, sometimes it's to adventure and travel and finding new places and new things. And sometimes that's to women and boobs and butts (Y) and sexual positions and researching things about sex. I feel like I kind of have to find it out for my future wife's sake,  considering I wouldn't know a thing about it if I hadn't asked questions before. I would've got to my wedding night and been like,"Okay... I know we have to be naked and in a bed. Right?" xD

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Thanks, Daz! Loved your answer. Don´t worry about the length ;)

 

 

.
 There's also the difference in attraction between men and women, which I went into detail about on another post recently:
 

Women deem 80% of guys less-than-average attractiveness, meaning 80% guys unlikely to get laid when they want it. Men deem women 50% above-average attractiveness, meaning 50% women are likely to get laid when they want it. Women are less likely to have sex with any random guys and have more decisions and power when it comes to (non-rape) sexual encounters. This means men are less likely to have sex when they want it and so are more willing when it becomes available, thus lowering the value of their sexuality. Women can walk into a bar, offer sex and get a bunch of men jumping at the chance. You'd be hard pressed to find a man who can succeed vice versa.

 

Is this difference in attraction showcased there regarding the attraction people get when they first meet?

So like a first-impression-physical-attraction?

 

Is this from a study? Just asking out of curiosity.

 

What I want to add, as well, to my previous thoughts to this topic:

 

I think, I asked this question in the first place, because I didn´t quite get why anybody would place such an emphasis on their own primitiveness.

And I heard it so so so much, so one day, I just wanted to ask that question here (which apparently got a bit misunderstood). Just to see what people on here might think about it.

Sure, everyone is primitive in some ways. I don´t question primitiveness as part of being a human.

I guess, I just don´t like it, when people reduce themselves to just being primitive and nothing more.

When they take their primitiveness as an excuse to do some things (sexual or not; doesn´t matter).

Humans evolved quite a bit and, honestly, I wouldn´t describe anyone (men or women) as solely being primitive.

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Thanks, Daz! Loved your answer. Don´t worry about the length ;)

 

 

 

Is this difference in attraction showcased there regarding the attraction people get when they first meet?

So like a first-impression-physical-attraction?

 

Is this from a study? Just asking out of curiosity.

 

What I want to add, as well, to my previous thoughts to this topic:

 

I think, I asked this question in the first place, because I didn´t quite get why anybody would place such an emphasis on their own primitiveness.

And I heard it so so so much, so one day, I just wanted to ask that question here (which apparently got a bit misunderstood). Just to see what people on here might think about it.

Sure, everyone is primitive in some ways. I don´t question primitiveness as part of being a human.

I guess, I just don´t like it, when people reduce themselves to just being primitive and nothing more.

When they take their primitiveness as an excuse to do some things (sexual or not; doesn´t matter).

Humans evolved quite a bit and, honestly, I wouldn´t describe anyone (men or women) as solely being primitive.

Oh sorry! I forgot to include it, it's not a study but it's from a dating site. I watch a lot of videos by people who read all the studies but I never have time to click all the links :P so I don't verify them all. I'll try and find some for you.

http://blog.okcupid.com/index.php/your-looks-and-online-dating/

I always think of the primitive bits as being part of the machine that is the human body. Whether you're religious or not, "you" or your "soul/consciousness" function differently from your body, and while the body has its own things it needs to do and those can take priority when they need to, you are still your own person with choices separate of its functions.

That's a good point; while it can be hard to go against instincts, there is a kind of reasonable standard we expect of each other. We don't just pee in the street; we hold it and find a toilet. Being horny doesn't get rapists off the hook, and I don't think I've heard of thieves getting off the hook for being famished. However, a simple example of something that's difficult for most people is when their eyes are just drawn to sexual things, like when they find themselves staring at exposed cleavage. I've even spoken to women who have accidentally looked at breasts when they were jiggling around and out there. Some people do look away and some aren't bothered. But most people, before they get a chance to react, will look down first at very exposed cleavage, before up.

My friend used to do a similar thing in school as a prank; he'd unzip his pants and stick his thumb out the fly and run at people, and girls would jump back and scream before they looked properly at it and realised it wasn't his penis xD our eyes are just drawn to sexual things, which is why sexy adverts sell so well with women and men.

I think the real reason people make such a deal of it is, some people are just a slave to their urges and don't really stop to think. They get hungry, they need food, they get a job. They want sex, they go to the club. They go along with crowds and let other people make the decisions for them, so long as they get their food and drink and sex and shelter. And they're not used to using to thinking much about their life and their future, so they use their instincts as an excuse when problems occur. But there are a lot of normal, self-aware people who do have more control over themselves, and their choices, and work towards goals while ignoring some of their minor urges like "sex right now" or "more food" or "stop exercising, this is tiring." Obviously, we all slip up and have things to work on, but some people are just more primitive than others and some are more conscious of themselves.

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Thanks for the link!  ^_^  I´m going to check it out!

 

Haha! Your friend and his prank.

 

I agree with what you are saying. I believe, we as humans are not slaves to our bodies (although of course sometimes it´s necessary and important to give in to our primal urges). But on many things we can make a choice.

In fact, I just remembered this article from Claire. It exactly tackles that question. It´s one of my favorite articles here:

 

http://waitingtillmarriage.org/issue-10-human-nature/

 

 

However, a simple example of something that's difficult for most people is when their eyes are just drawn to sexual things, like when they find themselves staring at exposed cleavage. I've even spoken to women who have accidentally looked at breasts when they were jiggling around and out there. Some people do look away and some aren't bothered. But most people, before they get a chance to react, will look down first at very exposed cleavage, before up.

 

That is very interesting to me.

I experienced both, as well. Looking automatically away or looking at cleavages. Well, I´m talking about really massive, exposed, BIG cleavages. Sometimes you just can´t look away ASAP, not when they are almost in your face or one meter apart from you. This doesn´t have to do anything with sexual orientation, though.

Like you said, sometimes eyes are drawn to sexual things.

 

Recently I saw a documentary (about sex or something?) and heterosexual women were tested in the context of a study which tried to find out when and how heterosexual women get aroused. So the women got exposed to some sexual content (movies, I believe) like heterosexual couples having sex, homosexual women having sex and animals having sex (maybe there was more, but I can´t remember).

And they were aroused by every single content. Well, the part of the brain showed the appropriate activity.

So the libido of women isn´t so complicated than one might think. It´s simple. Or to stick with this topic: quite primitive ;)

Unfortunately, I can´t remember the title of the documentary.

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