Sign in to follow this  
Followers 0
armytiger

30 and getting a little worried

14 posts in this topic

I'm actually a 30 year old male army officer and waiting for marriage! It's hard! I just wanted to put God first in everything since I was about 14 and started feeling the holy spirit and the spirit leading me through the Bible. I made it through Auburn universty by kinda lieing a few times to my guy friends but also a supportive church group. It just hit me kind of hard that even if an attractive church girl likes me it probably won't work because she's probably not waiting. the last girl I talked to wanted to do other things with I felt would be just as sinful. God lead me to AC Greens testimony and I say he waited until he was 38!!! That's so scary! Could he not find a good Christian wife sooner and he was rich? Any advice? Confused on whether to even ask pretty girls out that I see or kinda just wait on God.

5 people like this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

"Pretty girls" ..... my opinion wait on the Lord be of.good courage and He will direct your path. In order to know if a "pretty girl" should be pursued is to talk to her. See where her heart stands with God. Just because you talk to.a."pretty girl" it doesn't mean you're not waiting on God. When talking to a "pretty girl" don't focus on if shes "the one" focus on God so he can guide your tongue and if she's the one you'll definitely know. Oh and there are people that Waited until they were 50 to get married but it doesn't mean they couldn't find anyone it just means God said that they weren't ready. Thank you for your service! And I hope all of this makes sense...... I'm a bit under the weather and tired lol GOD BLESS!

7 people like this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks jasmine23! By pretty girls I meant I need to be attracted to my wife she doesn't have to be perfect.

Trying- don't give up! Especially if you are trying to put God first he will come through! Lamentations chapter 3 helped me a lot and psalms 37. Also Jasmine made a good point I think you do have to talk to girls in order to know and they r everywhere try visiting a new church or gym maybe or try an Internet site especially before you give up. Plus I have guy friends that I know God sent their wife's to them but the still had to make the first move and sometimes God's timing is not our own.

3 people like this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks jasmine23! By pretty girls I meant I need to be attracted to my wife she doesn't have to be perfect.

Ah ok I understand now but guess what.... she will not be perfect but she will be perfect for you! :)

2 people like this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Confused on whether to even ask pretty girls out that I see or kinda just wait on God.

 

Are these mutually exclusive? Can you wait on God and still ask pretty girls out?

 

While I don't know your story, is it possible that God is giving you opportunities you aren't aware of? There's a story about a man whose house was flooding, and he declined help from rescue workers in a car, a boat, and later a helicopter saying that God would save him. He drowned and when he got to heaven, he asked God why He didn't save him. God replied: "I sent you a car. I sent you a motorboat. I sent you a helicopter. What more were you looking for?â€

 

 

It just hit me kind of hard that even if an attractive church girl likes me it probably won't work because she's probably not waiting.

 

Seems to me like you're putting a lot of weight on "probably". I understand what you said about the last woman you opened to wanting to do things sexually that you weren't comfortable with. That's really rough. But there's a big difference between "probably" and "definitely". You know that there are women out there who are waiting; there are plenty on this forum and likely in your life as well. If God put that perfect woman in your life, would your fear of "probably" keep you from talking to her?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hello I know how difficult it is to be an officer and have the courage to survive in the sexual world that we live in. Try to meet someone in your command without fraternization or you can meet girls in church like you said. Finally, please do not do the online dating since many people on these sites are simply not who they pretend to be.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hey, I feel you bro. I'm 26 virgin WTM. What I would say is begin to getting to know different women. Like Jasmine said, focus on the Holy spirit. Don't worry about interviewing the women or figuring out if they're your wife. The Holy Spirit will guide you. Put yourself out there more. Go to more events. Learn to be more comfortable with women. There are literally hundreds of women in church waiting for guys LIKE YOU to ask them out. I'm sure a few may already have their eyes on you. You have a lot to offer. Don't underestimate yourself. You are God's special creation and a man of God.

 

And also----this is my personal opinion, take it or leave it: don't cling too tightly to the whole notion of marrying another virgin WTM(if you are). You will limit your possibilities or probably end up single forever. Just because someone isn't a virgin doesn't mean they are not pure or virtuous or wife material. God can redeem anyone. And you can (learn to) sexually satisfy a woman with prior experience. Your future sexually experienced wife, will be grateful and flattered by your commitment to her.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

1st, I thank you for your service to our country. And at 28 I think everyone know I am getting impatient, but everytime I feel my resolve slipping, God pull me out of my rut. It's hard dating for anyone, esp for WTM. Main reason Im planning to relocate, trying a new city hopefully will find better opinions. I dont have much advice but to speak up, never know who you might meet. My guy friend meet his wife at Olive Garden, saw her and her friends as they got their food they bowed their heads and said grace, he walked over started a convo, they hit it off, 10 months later was engaged.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I get impatient too. I'm 35 and still waiting. It's hard seeing other women younger than me getting married on my Facebook timeline while I'm still single. I pray everyday for my future husband & hope he does the same for me but I'm ready to meet him. It doesn't help reading other women's stories on how they met their husbands because I tend to think of all the situations happening to me, when God has His own way of bringing my future husband to me, that maybe different from all the testimonies I've read. All I know is I'm ready to meet and marry my future husband & hopefully he'll come sooner rather than later.

2 people like this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I can feel and understand the ladies getting more stressed as they got many things to worry abt, the attraction side, the motherhood, things that only ladies knows abt more than men, even men are in hurry to be a husband and a father  but i dont think the age is a big problem for us as am personaly 38 wtm as we get more mature abt our preferances and decisions .. so i hope everyone meet the other half soon or  we gonna be obliged to marry eachother  :lol:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm actually a 30 year old male army officer and waiting for marriage! It's hard! I just wanted to put God first in everything since I was about 14 and started feeling the holy spirit and the spirit leading me through the Bible. I made it through Auburn universty by kinda lieing a few times to my guy friends but also a supportive church group. It just hit me kind of hard that even if an attractive church girl likes me it probably won't work because she's probably not waiting. the last girl I talked to wanted to do other things with I felt would be just as sinful. God lead me to AC Greens testimony and I say he waited until he was 38!!! That's so scary! Could he not find a good Christian wife sooner and he was rich? Any advice? Confused on whether to even ask pretty girls out that I see or kinda just wait on God.

 

I really need to know where all the 30+ virgin guys hang out! Maybe you should set up a dating website or something! Help us ladies know where you find you! LOL.

 

Seriously though, stay encouraged.  At this point, you've got to believe that the right woman is out there, and since you've waited this long, I say don't just throw it all away on someone that's not worth your time, energy, attention, and love!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi Army tiger, I'm 31 and still waiting so I can understand how you feel. You seem to be fairly positive about it still which is good news, unlike me. I am losing hope of ever finding anyone, I'm trying what I can but I don't even meet enough women to even consider asking someone out. I don't think I've even met a girl that I've been interested in for about 3 years (since the end of my last relationship). Like you, since 14 as well, I've been praying and seeking God's guidance over this and yet all these years later I don't understand why life has taken me on this path but it is torture when you desire marriage and sex and just someone to share your life with (which is normal and natural) but is simply out of reach. The longer it continues the worse the desire becomes. 

 

I hope you do find someone (you seem to have drive and motivation given your army status) and don't end up in bitterness and frustration like myself, unable to virtually funcition now in daily life.

 

It's weird. As I read your post, I couldn't help but wonder why you can't seem to find someone to share your life with, despite the fact that I find myself in the exact same boat.  I can't necessarily say I'm "losing faith", but I do know I'm not of the same mindset as many other waiters I've read about on the forums.

 

I hope things get better for you. It sounds awful that you're not able to function in daily life due to bitterness and frustration.  I can kind of relate, but mine isn't totally about marriage and sex! :)

1 person likes this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You're not the only one fighting this battle at this age. So courage and remain faithful, God has not forgotten us.

God bless u.

1 person likes this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!


Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.


Sign In Now
Sign in to follow this  
Followers 0