waitn4myprince

When you say I do, will you take his last name

22 posts in this topic

Hi girls,

I don't know if anyone has posted this question already, I have only been on this site for like a month I think or maybe two. But I just wanted to know, When you get married, will you take his last name, will you add his last name onto your own via a hyphen or will you keep your own name.

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I'm definitely taking my husband's name. I just think it's a really beautiful tradition!

xxx

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I might be a little different here in my response, so... here goes.

I'll give a little background first. I come from a country that was colonized by the Spanish a long, long time ago, and many of the family names we now carry is Spanish. By some miracle, my Dad's family is one of the few who managed to retain a Tagalog last name. Unfortunately, I don't have any brothers, and my dad's only brother doesn't seem to want any children any time soon, and I'd just feel so sad if this uniqueness would be lost forever. :(

I mean, either way, it's not like my kids are going to take my last name, but in my culture, it is traditional to still put your mother's maiden name in your full name (which makes for very long names =P). So, personally, I'm hoping that my husband will at least allow me to put a hyphen on my last name, and allow our kids to integrate my maiden name in their full name, like in my culture.

If by chance, I get lucky, and he happens to have a Filipino last name too, then no probs, no fuss! Haha. Man, I think I'm so picky. I don't know... I think this trait of mine has more to do with preserving culture rather than anything else.

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Nuh uh! lol. I love my last name. It's not a super cool last name like Youngblood, or really pretty like Bell, or historic like Kennedy. But it is my surname and it sounds really good with my first name. if a woman wants to take her husband's last name, that's fine, but to me that is quite an old-fashioned thing and I don't ever want to be referred to as Mrs. Douglas Martin or whatever (you get what I mean.)

However, if my husband's last name is Youngblood or anything really cool like that, or beautiful, I may consider it (but it's unlikely.) Otherwise, I like my name the way it is. Oh, but I would go by Mrs, and not Ms.

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Sophie, i know what you mean; i wouldnt wanna be called "mrs. Douglas martin; im mrs. Sally martin thank you very much". Lol im married, but i am my own person

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By some miracle, my Dad's family is one of the few who managed to retain a Tagalog last name. Unfortunately, I don't have any brothers, and my dad's only brother doesn't seem to want any children any time soon, and I'd just feel so sad if this uniqueness would be lost forever. :(

I'm with you on this one!! I'm in similar situation as my dad only has 1 sibling (brother in his 50s with no kids) and I'm 1 of 4 girls, which essentially means my last name would end at me and my sisters. :( I also have a traditional, unique spanish last name and I would like to keep my last name as a way of preserving my culture. (My grandfather who I'm very close with also very recently passed away , and I feel that I would be honoring him and my family by keeping my name.)

That said, I am all for hyphenating or having my last name become my middle name.

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I would take his last name. It's what my mom did and I actually like the idea of it.

It would make me feel more like we are one. It would just make me feel a lot closer to him,

but I get people wanting to keep their name going or if it's part of their tradition.

My last name is a german one and I can't imagine what it would look like hyphenated with

some other last name lmao.

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I'm with you on this one!! I'm in similar situation as my dad only has 1 sibling (brother in his 50s with no kids) and I'm 1 of 4 girls, which essentially means my last name would end at me and my sisters. :( I also have a traditional, unique spanish last name and I would like to keep my last name as a way of preserving my culture. (My grandfather who I'm very close with also very recently passed away , and I feel that I would be honoring him and my family by keeping my name.)

That said, I am all for hyphenating or having my last name become my middle name.

Yey! I'm glad somebody understands. :lol: Well, the sad thing for me is that I actually never knew my grandfather, but according to my Dad, he's such a wonderful, kind person, and I feel as if this last name is the only thing that I have of him.

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hey girls!

Thank you so much for sharing. I have also posted this question in the guy forum if any of you want to know what the guys think about taking on last names. I personally have dreamed of being Doctor.Pan my whole life, when I graduate and work in the hospital, I dream of being called Dr. Pan over the intercom not Dr.Brown. However, I will add his name to mine via a hyphen so the kids and both parents will have the same last name. At family, social and school functions I will go by Mrs.Brown but at work, Im Dr.Pan B) there are certain conditions that I will not take on his last name:majority of them being if his last name will cause my kids to get picked on to epic proportions...sorry hun but in this case the pain ends with him. Im not gonna subject my kids to be taunted just because he has a last name like Sucsombudi (sucksomebooty) :lol: yeah....he can say goodbuy to that one 4ever...fo eva!!!

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B) there are certain conditions that I will not take on his last name:majority of them being if his last name will cause my kids to get picked on to epic proportions...sorry hun but in this case the pain ends with him. Im not gonna subject my kids to be taunted just because he has a last name like Sucsombudi (sucksomebooty) :lol: yeah....he can say goodbuy to that one 4ever...fo eva!!!

I'm with you w4mp. I've dreamed of being Dr. Pan forever. I have no plans to give that up. & it would take some serious smooth talk to get me to hyphenate a name like Gaylord Focker (Meet the Fockers). I don't care how much I love him, I don't see that going down. LOL. Btw, if your last name is Sucsombudi or Focker, we appologize :(

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I would. I know some girls don't if there like a dr. Or something but I still would it tradishnal.

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Even though I'm 99% sure I'll change my name when I get married, I think it's really cool when women hyphenate or don't change their last name at all. Girl power! B)

Also, since I plan on being a career woman like some of you, I really like the idea of keeping my maiden name at work and using my married name everywhere else, i.e. my work ID would have my maiden name on it, but my driver's license and all other legal documents would have his last name on it.

On a side note, I want to share this story I read about in a magazine. (I wish I could find the story online, but it was several years ago and I don't even remember which magazine it was.) Anyways, the article was written by a man who took his wife's maiden name as his new surname when they got married. Like some of you, his wife was one of a group of siblings that were all sisters, so her maiden name would "die out" once all the sisters got married. He had brothers and male cousins to carry on his own last name. So he took her last name so her maiden name would go on for at least one more generation. How cool is that?! :D

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On a side note, I want to share this story I read about in a magazine. (I wish I could find the story online, but it was several years ago and I don't even remember which magazine it was.) Anyways, the article was written by a man who took his wife's maiden name as his new surname when they got married. Like some of you, his wife was one of a group of siblings that were all sisters, so her maiden name would "die out" once all the sisters got married. He had brothers and male cousins to carry on his own last name. So he took her last name so her maiden name would go on for at least one more generation. How cool is that?! :D

pretty darn cool B) sometimes guys will just have to realize that as long as the family has one name it doesnt matter if its his or hers. Unity isnt gender dependent..if you know what I mean

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Sophie, i know what you mean; i wouldnt wanna be called "mrs. Douglas martin; im mrs. Sally martin thank you very much". Lol im married, but i am my own person

One person once called my mom "Mrs. Michael Novak" and she totally flipped. Not only did she retain her last name but she never even went on to "Mrs." She stuck with "Ms." I think it's great that she kept her last name, but I definitely want to be Mrs.

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I'll be keeping my last name and so will one of my boys. My brother and my male cousins have only girls for offspring, so it's likely my last name will disappear if I don't keep it going.

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Totally, my last name is really common & it's always kind of bugged me that it's so blah & and that I share it with so many other people. Maybe that's silly but it's just the way I feel. Also even though I do love my father I don't respect him due to his multiple infidelities (my parents are divorced, thank goodness) & for other reasons that aren't really worth mentioning here. I was actually considering my last name to my mother's maiden name after he dies (which could be anytime within the next 10-40 years he's in his early 60's but his side of the family have super long life expectancy), but I've now realised that it would probably really upset my (technically but not emotionally) half brother, who has sons therefore the 'family name' is going to continue for quite a while.

Whoops I accidentally 'thumbs down'ed my own post. Oh well.

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When it comes to me be willing to take my future husband's last name, it's not a matter of having a lack of interest in it, but something more personal. My dad gave me my initials for a very particular reason, and he passed away over a decade ago. I view keeping my initials as keeping part of him alive within me. So if my future husband's last name started with the same letter as mine, I'm definitely for taking it. If not, I'm more than willing to hyphenate.

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3) i'm accomplishing so much with my surname, it represents all that i am and there's no chance i am giving up apart of my identity.

YOU GO GURL!!!!

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