Invincible

'I Didn't Marry The Love Of My Life'

5 posts in this topic

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/08/04/marrying-for-love_n_5642062.html?ncid=fcbklnkushpmg00000063#

 

This woman makes me sick and I'm even more shocked that she is a life coach. She had an intense love for a man Fred, whom she regarded as her "soul mate," but decided she couldn't marry him because he couldn't give her the financial stability she wanted. Then she goes on to marry another man for his money who she didn't truly love. Okay, she valued money more than love. I think that makes her a shallow gold digger, but if she was honest about that with her husband and he married her anyways, then fine both were on the same page. But if you marry someone, at least have the decency to be faithful to them. Instead, she continued to have an emotional affair with Fred after she was married. I don't care if her husband knew about it, cheating doesn't always involve secrecy. She willfully went out of her way to rekindle old feelings with this Fred guy when those feelings ought to be reserved for her husband and him alone. While it's sad that this Fred suffered from cancer, he is equally to blame for his part in the affair because he knew she was married to another man. Ultimately though, she played both men. She got the financial security from one man she didn't love, while cheating on him by getting her emotional fix with a guy who made her feel love, but wasn't good enough to marry because he didn't make enough money. She wanted the best of both worlds without any kind of commitment. If that isn't the biggest form of selfishness, I don't know what is.

 

Every woman deserves to be seen as a human being and not just for her looks and body. In the same way, no man should be seen as just a walking ATM or emotional punching bag. This woman and those like her have always been the kind I fear the most when it comes to relationships. I would be devastated if one day, my wife told me she never truly loved me and only married me for my money.

 

Thoughts?

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That's awful. I do think that it can be possible to have 'soul mates' who you aren't longterm-relationship compatible with for one reason or another, but it's not fair to marry someone when you're still in love with another person. She, clearly, was never really over this guy, and it doesn't sound like she truly loved her husband at all.

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She screams "Daisy Buchanan" to me. Also, I never understood why some people think it's so important that their significant other should financially support them. I mean, it's one thing to be worried that they're not capable of taking care of themselves, but why do you expect them to pay for your ideal life? Just...earn something for yourself...

 

One of her blog entries about her divorce (shocker) seemed painfully ironic to me: http://www.nancytellsall.com/2014/02/20/post-divorce-epiphanies/#comments

 

Wow, if I thought the other article was bad...that one is just the actual worst.

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She screams "Daisy Buchanan" to me. Also, I never understood why some people think it's so important that their significant other should financially support them. I mean, it's one thing to be worried that they're not capable of taking care of themselves, but why do you expect them to pay for your ideal life? Just...earn something for yourself...

 

One of her blog entries about her divorce (shocker) seemed painfully ironic to me: http://www.nancytellsall.com/2014/02/20/post-divorce-epiphanies/#comments

 

You're right, that article put the one I posted to shame. That is honestly the most pathetic thing I have ever read in my life. If I didn't know who the author was, I would have thought it was written by a pouting 6-year-old.

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I've read several articles/blog posts recently from women who behave a certain way and then seem surprised by the results. I am glad that commenters, including women, seem to see a problem with the writer's behavior in the Huff Post article.

 

The blogger in the nancytellsall article has an interesting rationalization with "I have to say that I honestly sometimes feel I’m being punished for having stayed home for nearly two decades to raise my children." Really, having been a devoted wife and mother for 20 years is the problem and not the subsequent move to end the marriage?

 

This woman, who also writes for Huff Post sometimes, divorced her husband and then seems surprised that she can't find men who will commit to her (as noted in her 3/12/14 entry, "Dear Mr. Unavailable, in case she ever posts any thing else): http://www.jennyerikson.com/  

 

This woman on reddit was worried she'll have trouble landing a lifelong relationship even though she's had sex with "only" 18 guys: http://www.reddit.com/r/AskMen/comments/1sypck/guys_i_am_a_single_indian32f_woman_and_i_feel/

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