l8dyluck81

Non-waiters Gonna Hate, and Waiters (Still) Gonna Wait!

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Unfortunately, I can't figure out how to copy and paste my text because this computer won't do it. Here is a Word document that I've attached. Please read it and comment below!

 

Update: I did delete the file since it is now posted, which makes it much easier for everyone to read.

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Unfortunately, I can't figure out how to copy and paste my text because this computer won't do it. Here is a Word document that I've attached. Please read it and comment below!

 

(I'm pasting this in to assist the OP, I think it will get more reads and replies that way.)

 

I first discovered this website a couple years ago and I must say, it is exactly what I needed. Over the years, I’ve been self-conscious about my virginity, seeing it as a scarlet letter rather than a mantle to be borne with pride. I worried that my family thought I was gay. I worried about what men would say or do when they found out I was waiting. I thought I was weird for being the only adult virgin I knew. After I hit 30, I realized that there was a reason why things hadn’t worked out for me in the love department. I think God knows me so well that He knew I needed to wait. He knew that if I had found a relationship prior to making the decision to wait until marriage, that I would regret not waiting. I wasn’t particularly religious until this point in my life. I was raised Catholic, but never liked going to church. Because I realized how God has been working in my life all this time, I now am much more religious. My decision to wait has opened doors in my faith that I never knew were there. 
 
And yet, when I espouse my beliefs outside this forum, they are shunned. Non-waiters believe I’m out of my mind. People don’t want to believe that delaying gratification is better for your mind, body and soul. Sex feels too good to them to be considered “bad†in the wrong context. They think I’m out of touch with reality because I tell them I’m waiting so as to experience a deeper, more fulfilling relationship and marriage. They think it’s out of the question for people to abstain from sex if they don’t want to risk pregnancy or STI’s. They think birth control works 100% of the time and will tell you that sex is “safe†as long as it is done in this way. When you tell them that their assertion is not true, that prophylactics do not eliminate, they just reduce the chance of pregnancy and STI’s, they call you a fear-mongering Bible-thumper. Even though what you say is true. 
 
I continue to stand up for my beliefs outside this forum because people NEED to hear them. They may not want to, but they NEED to. If only so that they know that there are people in our sex-crazed society who DO believe in doing things the way God intended. Having my beliefs mocked and challenged has hurt me, but it has also strengthened my resolve. I continue to post my thoughts on these forums because I know that if just one person is positively influenced to make a change in their life because of my words, I will have fulfilled my purpose. My purpose is to get the word out that there are people who will stand up and do the right thing, even if it’s not the popular thing. I will tell people who think that sexual pleasure outside of marriage is a right, that they are wrong. Just because something is commonly done does not make it “rightâ€. In some cultures, cannibalism is common. Does that mean that it’s right? 
 
My advice to you, my fellow waiters, is to use this site as your home base. Come here when you need solace and reassurance. Come here when you need to commiserate about the difficulties you face as you wait. Come here to help others who you know want your help. But I implore you to please, also tell others about your choice. It does no good to constantly preach to the choir. Get your voice out there and be heard, so that others who might be on the fence can be positively influenced by your words. Love those who disagree with you, even though their words may hurt you. They need your love and understanding even more than those who share your views. Love them enough to pray for them, and pray that through your words they might finally begin to see the folly of their actions and beliefs. 
 
It takes a strong person to be a positive voice in the face of so much adversity. Stand up and be proud of your choice. Don’t let others tear you down because of their false beliefs. They have chosen the easy path. Everyone must make a choice between doing what is right and what is easy. It is “easy†to secretly be waiting. It is easy to keep your head down and pretend you’re just like everyone else. It is easy to come across as if you agree with extramarital sex without speaking up for your own beliefs. Now I ask you, what will your choice be? 
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Well done...

 

Although I am not a virgin, I do promote abstinence and WTM.

 

Many know I have a teenager daughter and practice what I preach.

 

I also work in a homeless shelter where I supervise single women and women with children. I have had several opportunities to share my testimony and my WTM journey. Sometimes I am met with a cocked head and a "do what?" or "huh?"  and a "more power to you". Sometimes I cause someone to stop and think about it. Think about a way to stop the hurt of being used because of their current situation and circumstance. The streets are tough! Setting the example of Gods love first...and giving all of you to Him. Teaching women that they have value and it is not determined ... okay I am going off the rails...but you see where I am headed.

So in keeping with the topic. YES!!! Promote waiting...promote it online,  promote it in your daily living and live it!!

 

Only good will come of it....

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Brenda, 

I think that's one of the reasons I chose to wait. The potential hurt of being used stopped me from doing anything sexual because I was afraid that sex would be all that guys would want from me. Like most fathers, my dad wanted to warn me about boys and sex, so the message I got from my dad was that "boys only want one thing". Well, with all due respect to my loving and protective father, the message I subconsciously absorbed was, "You're not worth loving, so boys will only want sex from you." Of course, the guys I ultimately fell for only wanted one thing, so when the realization dawned on me that that's all they thought I was good for, the message was reinforced big time. I held on to my virginity all the more after that.

 

I think one of the biggest reasons why I'm waiting, to be honest, is because I have to know for sure that at least one guy considers me worth the wait. 

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