What was the hardest thing about waiting for you?

[Mike 1,852]

Asked by Jordan...

 

What was the hardest thing about waiting for you?

[Jennifer 324]

Feeling lonely when you're single and worrying about being alone forever.

[Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ 592]

going through all the other relationships trying to find another waiter that would make me happy,

and love me back regardless of how obsessive i can be

 

and then rejecting them  all because they lacked that ''single, most critically important thing'' to me 

 

some of them were victims, you are never the same after you reject a victim for something out of her control , because of something you cant control, those were the worst of all

they were all beautiful souls, I just couldnt get past my heaviest burden , retroactive jealousy..i needed a waiter 

 

it was like every relationship was just bound to hurt me and someone else and i was on some destructive path to finding my wife during my most unstable moments in life, I even almost died from it

i never want to go back 

[e2493dt 69]

Seeing all of my high school friends engaged and not having anyone to date myself. Honestly I think there is a engagement frenzy going on.

[hanachu 275]

Hardest part about waiting was having someone you're about to marry but not married to yet.

 

"No sex" is a lot easier to follow if you don't have anyone to have sex with.

 

Other than that, there was a time where I felt an intense need to get married before a very specific age. Once I got over that, it was a lot better (but I wouldn't say that's a problem for just waiters :/a)

[Guest]

Having other Christian friends criticize me for choosing to wait while most of them continued to have sex with other women. Then 6 months down the road they would tell me how they did the wrong thing and wished they could change it. 

[Faeries 175]

21 hours ago, Jorge said:

Having other Christian friends criticize me for choosing to wait while most of them continued to have sex with other women. Then 6 months down the road they would tell me how they did the wrong thing and wished they could change it. 

I don't mean to change the topic (not married), but I notice this a lot. Especially from other women. They always say "I wish I would've waited," which doesn't bother me personally, but I wonder if they're being genuine. It seems like something they say just to say it, and I've always wondered why.

[Guest]

I question that a lot as well. My friends seemed to say that they regretted it, but when they were getting it they never seemed sorry or regretful. I think some women are genuine and others are just trying to appear apologetic. I've known women who had sex with numerous guys and would always tell them she was a virgin. I suspect women do it for the same reason that many men do it, to get more sex. 

[emily1030 289]

On 4/11/2015 at 3:01 AM, hanachu said:

Hardest part about waiting was having someone you're about to marry but not married to yet.

 

"No sex" is a lot easier to follow if you don't have anyone to have sex with.

This is so true. I honestly didn’t find it that hard to wait because I didn’t have the mindset of sleeping around. But once I was in a serious relationship and specifically when I was engaged, it became pretty frustrating because we had already made the commitment in our hearts but we knew we still had to wait until we were married.

The other hard part about waiting was just knowing that so many people I knew were out there having wonderful sex with their partners and I sometimes felt like I was wasting precious years when I could be enjoying it as well. 

[Invincible 7,975]

11 hours ago, emily1030 said:

The other hard part about waiting was just knowing that so many people I knew were out there having wonderful sex with their partners and I sometimes felt like I was wasting precious years when I could be enjoying it as well. 

I totally relate to this feeling so much. I'm approaching my mid-30's next year and it feels like I'm running out of time. As someone who wants kids, I don't have the luxury that young married couples have in waiting a few years before having them. If I do marry, I would have not choice but to have kids right off the bat. That means won't be much sex at all. While my future wife is pregnant and after giving birth, I wouldn't dream of burdening her with sex while she's recovering. When kids enter the picture, the less sex happens. I know life isn't fair, but I can't help but feel short-changed for exactly the reason you said. Many people typically enjoy casual sex in their youth for many years before they marry. For all I know my future wife may have experienced lots of sex before meeting me. Then there's me who chooses to resist my urges for many years and doing things the "right way," yet I will likely not get the chance to have much sex at all. Don't get me wrong, ultimately I'm waiting because it's the right thing to do. But some days I feel like what's the point in suffering in the wait when the pay off is so low? Everyone else (possibly including our future spouses) get all the fun when they're young, while we get the morsels.

But on a more positive note, congrats on finding the one. I know the wait must have been really tough for you. But I sincerely hope you will be greatly rewarded for your patience.

[emily1030 289]

@Invincible I totally get where you are coming from. If I felt like I needed to start trying to conceive right away, I would feel like I was missing out even more. But you said a few times that you won’t get to have much sex at all. I would think you could have lots of sex after your future wife recovers from delivery. You’ll still have your whole lives together

And on the topic of being envious of others having so much sex earlier in life, I always tried to remind myself that at least I wasn’t having to deal with the grief they felt when they broke up with someone they were so intimate with. I’m glad to have those moments with only my husband who I know I will spend the rest of my life with.

And thanks for the congrats!