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mkat

Because you've done other sexual things, might as well have sex?

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I admire that you want to wait until marriage for sex! The fact of the matter is that it isn't an easy thing to do, not even close; and especially not when you've become so close to someone in a relationship. We all make mistakes (and believe me we make them often), but what matters is that God is loving and forgiving, no matter what we do. Never let other people convince you that your virginity is worthless just because you've done some things in the past. You're still saving something special until your wedding day, and when that day comes you'll be so grateful you did, as will your husband!

 

Say strong girl, we're all going through the same struggles you are! That's why we're all here to support each other :)

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Even if you have had sex before, you can still decide to wait until marriage. Plus, even if you've done other stuff, you haven't even had sex. I will admit, in my view something like oral sex is going very far, but you still have sex to share with only your husband, which I think is still something. Like I said, though, even if you had had sex, you could still wait until marriage, anyway.

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I will admit, in my view something like oral sex is going very far, but you still have sex to share with only your husband, which I think is still something. 

I'm in that boat as a man

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Sex can always lead to pregnancy. This is something people who choose to have sex should never, ever forget. Condoms, and other birth control methods fail all the time. So, I would argue, if you've done everything but sex, you have precluded the possibility of an unwanted pregnancy. That's extremely responsible. I think unwanted pregnancies are very sad and I admire people who preclude them.

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I don't really know your whole story but I've done things as well, but that doesn't mean I should dwell into more sin and stupidity just cause I've made a mistake. Granted I don't think anything sexual act is any better than the actual act of intercourse. They're all the same in my book just different acts I suppose.

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No, This is reasoning that leads to trouble. Just because you've made some decisions down this road doesn't mean you have to keep making those decisions or choices (ie to go all the way with having sex). We all know society treats sex as if it were equivalent to the air we breathe, but it isn't. You can still choose to wait even if you've done things in the past-it is up to you. We are here to support your decision to wait regardless of the past.

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No, This is reasoning that leads to trouble. Just because you've made some decisions down this road doesn't mean you have to keep making those decisions or choices (ie to go all the way with having sex). 

 

Yay. +1 for not referring to it as a mistake!

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While I certainly disagree with the decision to have any sexual activity outside of marriage, the reasoning presented in the title of the thread is logically fallacious.  It would be like reasoning that since a person has committed some sort of crime, say an illegal download, that the might as well stop attempting to abide by any laws.  If you wouldn't accept that reasoning in a scenario like that, then there's no reason to accept that reasoning when it comes to sexual activity.

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NO.
Put your past in the past.
Stop doing "other sexual things" and keep it all for marriage, starting now.

I waited 27 years. Just got married to a man who (long ago) said he couldn't imagine being willing to marry someone without "knowing" them first.  He decided to take a chance with me, and what do you know, he fell in love, proposed, and said "I do" before "knowing" me :-)  It's so worth it - there's no guilt! No regrets!  It adds a trust, a love, a security, a PEACE you can't even imagine.

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