ktphoenix

Why are guys not tolerant of girls who are waiting?

18 posts in this topic

How am I supposed to get anywhere if I get dropped whenever a guy discovers I don't put out? It seems like every guy who takes interest in me just wants to get in my pants, and I find out the hard way. And I don't even put out a vibe that I want to shag anyone (I'm sure yall know what I'm talking about). When they figure out (not by me telling them, but by me not making or returning advances) that I don't want to be involved like that, then on to the next girl. Does anyone else have this problem? Maybe it's just me... I'm doomed.

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I have had the same experience with one guy, only one because of how few men I have had that much interaction with not because they're aren't plenty of men like that. Honestly, it hurts that they only see you as a sex object and that the society we live in tells them that that is fine behavior for men. But I assure you those are not the quality men that we deserve and that when they become uninterested, it is a blessing to us. There are men who aren't only after sex, they are difficult to find but they are there. Some of them will probably respond to this in a bit. ;)

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Well the stereotypical and the truth is men are pigs, even guys who wait have messed up thoughts going through their heads half the time. That's just the majority of the population today and its the sad truth.

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Well the stereotypical and the truth is men are pigs, even guys who wait have messed up thoughts going through their heads half the time. That's just the majority of the population today and its the sad truth.

I reluctantly agree with you. I wanna disagree, but let's get real. Even the waiters who are genuinely not after a girl just for sex who will eventually wait till marriage with her do have inappropriate sexual thoughts from time to time. Nobody is perfect neither the men nor women.

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You're not doomed. There are plenty of guys on this site who are examples of good men who will wait, men who would love you for the person that you are not simply for the body they want to shag with. So the men on this site should be an indication that there are good men out there and not just the ones on here. They're hard to come by, but they're out there.

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There are men who aren't only after sex, they are difficult to find but they are there.

It's true. Some of us are looking for more than sex. Some of us want a girl who makes good sandwiches too :)

Well the stereotypical and the truth is men are pigs, even guys who wait have messed up thoughts going through their heads half the time. That's just the majority of the population today and its the sad truth.

I reluctantly agree with you. I wanna disagree, but let's get real. Even the waiters who are genuinely not after a girl just for sex who will eventually wait till marriage with her do have inappropriate sexual thoughts from time to time. Nobody is perfect neither the men nor women.

I have no problem disagreeing with that. Having sexual desires does not make a man a pig, it means he's a normal functioning male. I hate it how people rag on guys for our sex drives as if we had any control over having those urges. It's natural and good for men to desire a woman's body, that's how God created men. To put down that desire in and of itself is to proverbially slap God in the face. Its nothng to be ashamed of. People mistake sexual desire for lust. Two very diffetent things. It's how he deals with that desire that determines what kind of man he is. It's when he disrespects women and thinks of them as only sex objects that makes him a pig.If he is someone who believes that sexual expression should only be done in the confines of a loving marriage, then it is beautiful and good.

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I have no problem disagreeing with that. Having sexual desires does not make a man a pig, it means he's a normal functioning male. I hate it how people rag on guys for our sex drives as if we had any control over having those urges. It's natural and good for men to desire a woman's body, that's how God created men. To put down that desire in and of itself is to proverbially slap God in the face. Its nothng to be ashamed of. People mistake sexual desire for lust. Two very diffetent things. 

 

To add to this, a man is not a pig or asshole for refusing to date you if you're waiting. No more than you are for refusing to date him for not waiting. Most guys are looking for more than just sex in the relationship, they want to get to know you, date properly, maybe even marriage if everything goes well. It's just that they have needs and desires, and not everyone thinks waiting is the only correct path.

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Well , the guys here said pretty much everything I would have said :)

I just want to tell you , you are not alone , & you have this site to prove that .

& There are a lot of people out there seeking someone like you  , it isn't gonna be easy , & you sure knew that when you made the decision to wait , it is gonna take someone as special as you to see beyond the physical thing .

Just don't ever give up or feel frustrated :) & if you do ,we are here for you :)

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I didn't say for having sexual desires that's perfectly normal. I meant guys lust way more than women it's something we struggle with.

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I meant guys lust way more than women it's something we struggle with.

 

Absolutely false. The difference is how women lust. Men are more "visual", more fixated on outer appearance. With women its has more to do with one's manner and attitude. But that isn't to say appearance is not important; I can tell you right now not many women in America would turn away advances from Brad Pitt or Ryan Gosling. 

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hello girl. Please do not be diappointed!! there are plenty guys (just like me! :D ) out there who really really appreciate an honest girl that takes sex seriously and want to wait till marriage. i hope there are more women like you in this world. Cheers, and Happy new year!   :D

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How am I supposed to get anywhere if I get dropped whenever a guy discovers I don't put out? It seems like every guy who takes interest in me just wants to get in my pants, and I find out the hard way. And I don't even put out a vibe that I want to shag anyone (I'm sure yall know what I'm talking about). When they figure out (not by me telling them, but by me not making or returning advances) that I don't want to be involved like that, then on to the next girl. Does anyone else have this problem? Maybe it's just me... I'm doomed.

It is certainly not just you.  It is a reality.  Sleezy guys are a dime a dozen.  (The sad truth!)

The part that makes guys jerks is when they avoid you, or lead you on and then stop calling, or some are even mean when they find out they have no chance of getting laid!  There were TWO different guys who lied about me when they realized I wasn't going to put out.  One guy told people I gave him a bj.  The other guy told people I was a b****.  I found out because people told me what they said. 

I think that men not only struggle with their high levels of testosterone but also with selfishness.

I would respect a guy who said, "Waiting for marriage is just not for me" instead of the cold shoulder and tricking girls into thinking they are a "nice guy" when they really are sleezy.

A good guy is someone who uses self-control and respects women despite their urges.  Good guys do exist but they are not as common. They are also not hanging out at the bars and going to parties every weekend.  If you go to those places looking for a good guy, you are likely to find a lot of sleezy ones telling you whatever you want to hear. 

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It is certainly not just you.  It is a reality.  Sleezy guys are a dime a dozen.  (The sad truth!)

The part that makes guys jerks is when they avoid you, or lead you on and then stop calling, or some are even mean when they find out they have no chance of getting laid!  

Yeah, the last time this happened, the guy gave his friend my number, who then sent me threatening text messages

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Yeah, the last time this happened, the guy gave his friend my number, who then sent me threatening text messages

 

ya, it can get ugly. And it can hurt the self-esteem to be rejected over and over because you won't put out.

 

I told someone I was waiting until marriage and he said that was okay.  He ended up trying to kiss me before we even went on a first date.  I interpretted that as someone who is going to try to convince me otherwise.

 

 

Manipulation can be coercion and is not uncommon for a young woman to loose her virginity this way.  She just gives in to the pressure, especially when he is claiming he is a nice guy.

That's just one more reason I support Waiting Until Marriage.  To weed out all the slimebags (and there are many). 

Waiting Until Marriage empowers women. 

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Happy new year to all. Hope everyone had a safe new years eve. All the best for 2014. I'm considering using match.com after watching that conmerical featuring Leroy thr dog. I am bit worried.

1. When I submitt my credit card info will there be chance of hackers getting hold of it

2. Are the profiles real ans verified. I had problem with scammers and don't want to fall for a fake profile.

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Happy new year to all. Hope everyone had a safe new years eve. All the best for 2014. I'm considering using match.com after watching that conmerical featuring Leroy thr dog. I am bit worried.

1. When I submitt my credit card info will there be chance of hackers getting hold of it

2. Are the profiles real ans verified. I had problem with scammers and don't want to fall for a fake profile.

 

Uhhh... Wrong topic bud.

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Not just you. You just gotta expect that but think of all the girls who send up with those same guys and feel pressured because if they stop putting out then the guy will leave them. Don't worry and just keep on truckin :) Eventually you'll find someone willing to wait

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