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#1 Stacie

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Posted 14 December 2013 - 12:28 PM

We are all collectively waiting to have sex until marriage, but what about kissing? 

If kissing is allowable before marriage to you, how long should you wait for the first kiss of a relationship? 

Is a goodbye kiss for the first official date okay? 

If you are a guy, what if she kissed you?

 

 


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#2 Dasboy1

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Posted 14 December 2013 - 02:02 PM

I'm one of those guys were I'm fine either way I think like I wouldn't wanna make out or anything, but I would kiss her if she was okay with it and not if she wanted to wait on that too. I don't see it as big of a deal cause I don't plan on taking it to the makeout level just like a kiss goodnight or goodbye something like that.

#3 Happy when sailing

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Posted 14 December 2013 - 05:41 PM

Hmmm interesting,
Ok for me Im happy for the girl to take the initiative and kiss away. However I just noticed that you mention first dates. For me the first couple of dates are going to be kiss free unless things go very very well and a kiss good night is appropriate.

Differing from a lot of people on here I am ok with a girl who has kissed and been "close" with others before me. Id prefer her previous to be non sexual but open minded if her attitude is right. Only as I would expect her to get from me in return.

Ps a goodnight peck kiss is fine. Proper kiss is different he he .

Col xx

#4 wny

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Posted 14 December 2013 - 06:40 PM

I'm saving making out for marriage, but I'm still undecided about kissing. If I met a woman who wanted to I would, but I'm not sure if I'm going to make a point to wait on it.



#5 rookiepilot1

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Posted 15 December 2013 - 03:37 AM

Good question Queen

For me I'm cool with and would readily accept, and enjoy either.
If I'm dating a very nice girl and she wanted to wait to kiss me either later on in our relationship or till we or she would meet the guy she's gonna marry if not me.
Then I'm fine with this.
I'd like to date and get to know her, not her lips you know.
For me I'd feel a simple kiss goodnight is okay though, after we've been dating awhile.

Kissing to me is okay prior to marriage, if and I say if it's simple and innocently minded.
I feel about, well there's no exact timeframe I can say.
But when we're both comfortable and it just kinda felt like it comes naturally.

Nope I'm "old fashioned" I guess, first date, even though it's a date.
*And I'm with the notion that if a guy ask a girl, or vice versa, out to a specific place, event and they share some time together.
It is a date.
They're not dating as in having a relationship, but it is a date.
But I digress, enough on the wordplay.*

On a first date is too soon to introduce physical actions especially one so strong.
Maybe depending upon the circumstance holding hands briefly or touching would be appropriate.


Well as a guy if a girl kissed me, .....
I'd turn and run far, far away and hide underneath a rock.
Well seriously, I'd like a gentleman following my shock, I'd thank her for such a bold gesture.
Ask what prompted her to go to such an extreme.
And well I'd be flattered!

#6 markb4

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Posted 15 December 2013 - 10:50 AM

I'm trying to wait to kiss as well.



#7 Waiting-4-the-1

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Posted 15 December 2013 - 01:04 PM

Ugh, this is the one topic that I can never decide on! I really don't think I'd kiss on a first date unless it was someone I had known for years and we were really good friends before or something. I think "chaste" kisses would be okay with me. I'm fine with kisses on the forehead or lightly on the lips. And nothing lying down! (That's more for me though, because I don't trust myself!)



#8 Invincible

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Posted 16 December 2013 - 12:56 AM

I'm actually contemplating saving my first kiss till marriage. I figured I've gone this long without any kind of physical intimacy, might as well go all the way ;) But I think I would be a very physically affectionate person if I had no inhibitions so I think a kiss on the lips might be too intensive for me. It's kind of one of those dilemmas because a kiss on the lips might be too tempting, but I wouldn't really know for sure unless I did it. I figure I might as well play it safe and save my first kiss till marriage. Though that would make things even more difficult than they already are. I honestly haven't decided anything concrete yet.

 

I am definitely not okay with kissing on the first date. I'm not even sure I would hold hands with her on the first date, unless maybe if I was good friends with her before. Which would probably be the case anyways because I believe in being friends first before dating. The only kind of kiss I'd be remotely okay with on a first date is maybe a quick kiss on the cheek or forehead.


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#9 Matthew

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Posted 16 December 2013 - 09:05 AM

I allow and plan on kissing before marriage. I'll try to hold off on really intense making out, as hard as that is. If things are going really well I'll probably go for a kiss by the third date, maybe one on her cheek or forehead on the first. I'd greatly prefer to have to initiate the physical side of the relationship, for a variety of reasons, so I'm not exactly keen on her kissing me first, confidence-boosting as that would be.


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#10 Jegsy Scarr

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Posted 17 December 2013 - 11:03 AM

I'm okay with some kissing (like a peck on the lips kind of thing) before marriage, but I wouldn't do that on a first date (maybe on the cheek). But passionate kissing (more than a few seconds, open-mouthed, tongues etc.) is all getting saved for marriage. If I was with someone who wanted to wait till marriage to kiss, then I think I'd be okay with that too.

 

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#11 WanderingWashingtonian

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Posted 18 December 2013 - 01:10 AM

My goodness, you all make me feel so scandalous! I love to kiss. I have kissed before marriage, and I plan to do so in the future, though I would be willing to wait if the guy was saving kissing for marriage. And yeah, by kissing, I mean I have "made out," "french-kissed," and yeah, some of it has been horizontal. For a long, long time. And I would happily do it all again. When I decided to wait, and later, when I started dating, I based a lot of my purity decisions on wanting to follow in my parents' footsteps. For them, the guidelines were always "the clothes stay on and the hands do not go beneath them." That has been the standard I have chosen for myself as well.

 

As for the question of when to kiss, I am not opposed to the idea of fully kissing on a first date if I already know the guy pretty well, and I would be totally comfortable with a kiss on the cheek or a hug or hand-holding. If it was a date with someone who was still something of a stranger to me, I would perhaps accept a kiss on the cheek, but I would prefer to receive only a quick hug until I knew him better. It all depends on the extent of the relationship prior to dating. My first kiss came after dating the guy for over two months; given that neither of us were saving our kisses for marriage, it felt like it was way too long before it happened, though I would not have felt entirely ready to kiss him if he had tried on the first date.

 

But yeah, unless the guy objects, there shall be kissing!


"Patience produces character, and character produces hope. And this hope will never disappoint us..." - Romans 5:4-5a

#12 wny

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Posted 18 December 2013 - 01:23 AM

My goodness, you all make me feel so scandalous! I love to kiss.

Only in a place like this would you be considered anywhere near scandalous, so don't worry about it. I think it's just all about what one considers morally correct or what one thinks they're okay with being shared with more than only their spouse. As much as I would argue that both partners saving even the smallest thing makes the sexual aspect of one's future marriage more special (even if maybe only a fairly small amount), there are people who would be perfectly happy without that specialness. There are people who are perfectly happy without having the speciality of being each other's only sexual (as in, intercourse) partners, in fact.



#13 Dasboy1

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Posted 18 December 2013 - 11:51 AM

Don't worry Washington when I say I plan not to makeout it's cause previous experiences have showed me I can't really.

#14 markb4

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Posted 19 December 2013 - 12:39 PM

and yeah, some of it has been horizontal. 

 

Hmm...trying to figure out what horizontal kissing is....



#15 Daydreamer

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Posted 19 December 2013 - 04:10 PM

I'm fine either way myself. If who ever I'm dating wants to save their kiss till they are married then that's fine with me. I just dont think I would get any further then a quick kiss.

 

Hmm...trying to figure out what horizontal kissing is....

  I could be wrong but I'm guessing it's kissing while laying down? lol


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#16 Haitigirl9

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Posted 21 December 2013 - 07:16 PM

I am not specifically saving kissing for marriage but I do think it would be cool if my future husband will be the only man that I kiss. As far as time frame goes I will probably not kiss on the first date because I have not even had my first kiss yet and will be very very very nervous. Kissing is innocent enough and I wouldn't let it go any further than that.


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#17 Adeleyestar

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Posted 27 December 2013 - 09:17 PM

I feel the first kiss would come when you feel comfortable with the person. I was never going to save my first kiss till marriage, but now that i'm 21 and have never been kissed I feel more likely to kiss the guy I might end up marrying. When i was awkward about the whole boy thing in middle school, I always thought that as soon as I went to college I was going to have an array of boyfriends. But now i'm more bent on finding someone i'm most likely to marry.



#18 Adeleyestar

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Posted 27 December 2013 - 09:18 PM

Also I do theatre, and I really really hope that I get a real first kiss before I end up having to do it as a character



#19 Aurora

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Posted 29 December 2013 - 10:51 PM

Phillip and I didn't kiss until after 3 months of dating-in fact, we told each other that we loved each other before we ever kissed (a few weeks before). We'd held hands before that, but we would always just end our dates with a hug instead. It just felt more intimate, in a way, hugging him. Not in a sexual way, but in a 'getting to know you and making it last' kind of way, if that makes any sense.

Even though we've both dated other people before, I was his first kiss, and he was my second. I wish I had saved my first kiss for him too, especially because I didn't really care much for the first guy I kissed, and we just did it out of the expectations of society.

 

To me, I think it all depends on your reasoning for wanting to kiss. If you want to kiss because you want to show your affection for the person you're dating, then go for it. If, however, you're kissing because you've been dating a certain amount of time and 'society dictates that kissing is the proper action', then you're in the wrong. Also, don't kiss if the reasoning for it is because it is the closest you can safely get to sex.

 

Kissing, if done for the right reasons, can be a wonderful, gratifying experience. Save it for someone you know you care about.



#20 wny

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Posted 29 December 2013 - 11:00 PM

I know I posted on here before, but I really an undecided on this topic. Part of me thinks I definitely won't, as it would be nice to do a little something physical with a girlfriend, but then part of me thinks it would be great to save it all (I'm already saving so much).

 

But, I also wonder if saving even kissing means you can't date very long until marriage (as it's hard to save SO much for a long amount of time). Because I'll be in school for a long time, I really wouldn't be able to marry any time soon, so I wonder how realistic it is to want to save kissing. Not so much for myself, but because I worry a girlfriend would get too fed up with waiting for so long.






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