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TheJayspyder

"Help: I hate my Husband!"

10 posts in this topic

Yes.

 

Okay.

 

So what I got from this is that this woman "hates" her husband because she doesn't have much tolerance for his little quirks. She complains that he chews his food too loudly, and other crap. But what gets me is the author's take on marriage...

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I agree that this Cindy seems shallow and hard-to-please. The author does have a strange perspective on marriage. She and her "clients" or whatever are too preoccupied with feelings and with what the husband is doing, in my opinion. Just seeing love as a verb /choice and focusing on what you can do for your spouse seem to me like a solution to many of their problems. The woman I marry will have that kind of focus, and will have acquired the skill of contentment as well.

 

The comments are pretty intriguing. Some say marriage is only good for men, some for women; some say NO ONE should EVER get married; some report being happily married. It all points to life being largely what you make it and a little bit of luck, I believe.

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Interesting Read there

 

It's funny how many folks complain about a decent, happy and fulfilling life.

Why I wonder, when there's scores of women out there as the Author describes who are in really dangerous, or unhealthy marriages.

 

You see I hope my wife of someday doesn't expect me to be Casanova everyday.

 

Though I'd certainly bring her flowers on a Tuesday just cause I love her.

 

And she'd do something like swing by and have lunch with me during the workday.

 

But it's funny how "in-content" and "miserable" some folks are.

 

 

Though reading this article I've thought again about something I tend to think of.

I'd want if possible for Mrs RookiePilot to be a housewife, however if it'd lead to boredom and unfulfillment in her life then certainly pursuing her career would be a better choice you know.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Some of my perspective stems from this;

Growing up, My mom had to work all day, then come home and be "Mom".

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I think hating your spouse is an outcome of spending too much time with them. I'm not sure if this relates but i have an identical twin sister and the longest we have been apart since birth has been about 3 days and the little things she does like chew her gum the way she does and how she always waits for the last minute to change lanes while driving drives me absolutely crazy! yet when someone else does it, it doesn't bother me. However, if we were separated for a long period of time i don't know how i would manage. So personally i think you can hate those little things someone does or even want to kill them at times but still love them.

 

And for the people who say that marriage doesn't benefit women or marriage doesn't benefit men are delusional, marriage benefits, or a common law unions benefits both parties.

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Wow! This lady sounds very rude and ungrateful! Life isn't perfect and all humans have their flaws and I'm sure her husband can say a lot of negative things about her. She should be grateful for having a nice, simple decent husband. The grass always looks greener on the otherside until you see all the imperfections and then are left getting used and passed around and unstable. I haven't been married for long, but I like it so far. I love the stability and am very in love with my husband. He's an average guy and we have our disagreements but I love being married and a wife♥

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To be able to decipher this article and put labels on people is saying you may know what marriage of 12 years is like....

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To be able to decipher this article and put labels on people is saying you may know what marriage of 12 years is like....

 

I'm not exactly sure what you're saying. Saying "what marriage of 12 years is like" suggests that marriage is the same for any given couple.

 

If you're simply saying that people that lack first-hand experience (such as we that have commented so far) should not make hasty judgements, then I would agree, but I would argue that we should make judgements. There are lots of cynics regarding marriage and I feel if one is going to have a happy one they have to be able to make judgements about those people/scenarios and how to avoid having the same negative experience(s).

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This married woman wrote:

 

"But this hate I feel, it simmers and I wonder if it's a sign that there could be a better partner out there for me. Little things grate on me every day. My husband chews his food loudly. I hate his father. I hate our domestic hum-drum. This can't be love!"

 

 

 

And...

 

"My hate comes from this feeling that I'm missing out on something else."

 

Maybe this woman just isn't happy with her life in general and she is erroneously attributing her lack of happiness to her husband? For some reason I get this impression. As if, finding another man is somehow going to be a fix for her lack of fulfillment in life. But it certainly won't be if the problem is with her.

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