Sally

PostSecret Post :(

13 posts in this topic

green.jpg

 

 

I don't believe that anyone should ever feel this way. I hope that my future husband and I can have good communication about sex and explore each other's fantasies/desires. What are your thoughts ?!?

4 people like this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

If they don't communicte about sex, then it'll stay bad with him thinking he's doing good. If she doesn't speak up, he'll assume he's good.

3 people like this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Well that's her fault for not telling him if I was pleasuring my wife I would want her to tell me. I would tell her if she wasn't me.

2 people like this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Lack of communication is IMO one of two things that ruins a sex life and by extension, a marriage. The other being selfishness. Bad communication speaks to a deeper problem in the marriage than not having your sexual needs fulfilled. Your spouse is not human being, not a mind reader. If you need something, you shouldn't be afraid to ask for it. It does a disservice to both you and your spouse by not being honest with each other. It only leads to resentment when one person thinks everything is going fine while for the other person, it is not. Some people do not communicate their sexual needs because they are afraid of offended their spouse and don't want them to feel inadequate. This is perhaps why many women seem to fake orgasms. So what we have in the long run is a husband who is complacent and unwittingly thinking he satisfies her when in truth, the wife is secretly in sexual frustration. He may feel somewhat inadequate initially, but it will only spur him to try to please her even more. The alternative is much more devastating in the long run. 

3 people like this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

don't enter a marriage with a "what-can-you-do-for-me" attitude!

marriage is about sharing a life together and not just sex.

compatibility is a choice. 

obviously if she was not ready to drop her selfish ways then she was definitely not ready for a marriage in the first place. 

also she should communicate about her sexual needs to her husband and they should BOTH work on it.

come on! in a marriage the couple works as a team!

 

ALSO

 

i believe that if a couple are truly in love then the love making will come naturally and they will gradually become better and better at it.

if they don't truly love one another then they will make up sex technique for what they lack WHICH IS LOVE.

if she loved her husband she would not say such a selfish disgusting thing about her SPOUSE. that is not true love! and not a good example to people!

 

ANOTHER THING:

 

the way people treat others is a reflection of how they feel about themselves. if she has the nerve to say such a cruel thing about her husband, then what does that say about herself? in a real marriage the spouses will honor each other, be kind, and patient. 

9 people like this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

She could have taught him or told him he sucks at first. Then she would have not whine.

 

Sentimental children forever whining about how bitterly unfair their lives have been.

1 person likes this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Wow, that's so horrible! Basically, she's saying that she doesn't love him because she doesn't enjoy the sex. 

 

Also, the way she complains he has "no idea what he's doing", as if it's all his fault. Last time I checked, sex involved two people. It really says a lot about her that she thinks it's all his fault and nothing to do with her.

 

I feel sorry for the guy. He deserves someone who actually loves him for who he is and treats him with respect.

 

xxx

3 people like this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

She's obviously a very selfish person to even believe something like that let alone post it online for the whole world to see. I find it EXTREMELY hard to believe that her husband doesn't know what he's doing after 25 years...now he may not be doing what she wants...but that has more to do with HER not telling him or guiding him in the right way. It's all communication and they obviousy don't have it.

3 people like this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

That's so horrible, some people are just so mean to others. If you aren't happy with what you are getting its nobody's fault but your own, because if you spoke up I'm sure your spouse would be happy to make some changes if it meant making you happier. After all, all the things they were doing in the first place were with that goal in mind, so why would it be any skin off their nose if you asked for something different? I think some people are just incapable of being happy,so they constantly look for a reason to be unhappy. If that is her biggest complaint after 25 years she probably has a pretty sweet deal going on.

1 person likes this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Lack of communication. There are plenty of guys who are not virgins and yet their girlfriend's still aren't at all satisfied. it's not a matter of being a virgin or not. many people get into relationships with non-virgins and don't like their sex life. maybe their partner is unwilling to do the things they love, or maybe they haven't communicated with their partner due to embarassement and not wanting to hurt their feelings.

1 person likes this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I was thinking about this post for a while...yes, it definitely comes down to communication, but also selflessness when you're in bed with your husband/wife. I feel like some guys honestly don't care if their wife gets off or not. They have this attitude like, it's great for me so it must be great for her too. They don't understand that their wife want to get off too!!! (sorry for explicitness)

 

I've just heard stories of guys finishing quickly and not caring at all if their partner finished, or enjoyed themselves. And then the wife would be frustrated and say, "Next time I want to finish too" and the husband would say "okay," but then the next time would be the exact same thing...

 

Guys also need to be humble enough to ask for directions. Say, How am I doing? Do you like this? Can you show me what you like? etc. If guys did that...I don't think women would have any complaints!!

 

So, if this woman communicated her concerns, and made suggestions and gave directions and the guy still didn't care...that would make me sad/angry if I was his wife.

1 person likes this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think the woman who created this postcard post is mad at her husband for some reason (not necessarily the sex) and I think she's just being mean.  If the couple couldn't figure out this stuff in 25 years and there's this much built up resentment, maybe she should let the guy move on with his life.
 

Just because she married a virgin doesn't mean he is husband material or right for her.  It's easy to blame someone else for how your life turned out.

 

1 person likes this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Maybe because people view sex as just a physical thing like ice-skating so they only care about getting off and they dont view it as intimacy, exchanging vulnerability etc...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!


Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.


Sign In Now