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virjizz

Sub-forums for Gender neutrals

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So there's like several subforums called "Ask the guys" and "ask the girls", "Guys only" "Girls only" but none for gender neutral people. The ones who don't fit in the two categories "boy" or "girl" and prefer to go by "other" and I am one of them.

Is there any chance for this to happen, please?

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i hope they can get this sorted for you, i know loads of gender neutral people and i understand how hard & frustrating it can be to be forced into those labels.

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Hmm. That's an interesting request. I've actually never met a gender-neutral person before (Hi I'm Mike. Nice to meet you!). I've met people who are trans, but I think they usually identify as their destination gender, right? 

 

If I were being perfectly scientific, I wouldn't have an "Ask the Girls" and an "Ask the Guys" forum because psychologically, gender is kind of an illusion (we're more alike than we are different), and lumping people into traditional gender roles is bad for relationships. 

 

But I think that allowing people to ask questions of the opposite sex helps us discover these similarities. A guy will post something in "Ask the Girls" section to the effect of "We're different on this, right?" and then the girl response will effectively say "Nope, we're just like you." Same goes for girls asking guys questions. In a roundabout way, asking questions can help people neutralize their preexisting expectations about gender.

 

And there are lots of non-gender-stereotypical answers to questions in both sections.

 

So I kind of want to say "Respond in whichever section you feel comfortable in, or both." But I guess you're saying that you don't feel comfortable in either. I'm open to creating a new section for gender-neutral, but it would only make sense if there were enough gender-neutral members here to keep it active, and right now I think you might be our one and only. I'll definitely keep it in mind though, especially if I see more gender-neutral members pop up.

 

Just for my own edification (sorry if I say something stupid here; again, I'm new to this), but are you oriented towards one gender over the other, sexually? Like, which gender do you think you'll marry? Or would you want to marry another gender-neutral? Or do you have no preference? Sorry if those are weird questions. Trying to get my head around it. 

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Hmm. That's an interesting request. I've actually never met a gender-neutral person before (Hi I'm Mike. Nice to meet you!). I've met people who are trans, but I think they usually identify as their destination gender, right? 

 

If I were being perfectly scientific, I wouldn't have an "Ask the Girls" and an "Ask the Guys" forum because psychologically, gender is kind of an illusion (we're more alike than we are different), and lumping people into traditional gender roles is bad for relationships. 

 

But I think that allowing people to ask questions of the opposite sex helps us discover these similarities. A guy will post something in "Ask the Girls" section to the effect of "We're different on this, right?" and then the girl response will effectively say "Nope, we're just like you." Same goes for girls asking guys questions. In a roundabout way, asking questions can help people neutralize their preexisting expectations about gender.

 

And there are lots of non-gender-stereotypical answers to questions in both sections.

 

So I kind of want to say "Respond in whichever section you feel comfortable in, or both." But I guess you're saying that you don't feel comfortable in either. I'm open to creating a new section for gender-neutral, but it would only make sense if there were enough gender-neutral members here to keep it active, and right now I think you might be our one and only. I'll definitely keep it in mind though, especially if I see more gender-neutral members pop up.

 

Just for my own edification (sorry if I same something stupid here; again, I'm new to this), but are you oriented towards one gender over the other, sexually? Like, which gender do you think you'll marry? Or would you want to marry another gender-neutral? Or do you have no preference? Sorry if those are weird questions. Trying to get my head around it. 

I appreciate your response very much. So Thank you for taking it in consideration. :)

I'm pansexual, which means I am sexually attracted to all sexes and gender identities so I don't have a preference. But that's only me, there are other gender neutrals who are only attracted to males for example. Gender identity and sexuality has no relation whatsoever. :)

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Sex vs. Gender
Is "girls only" and "guys only" referring to sex or gender?  Personally, I assumed it was referring to sex (xx or xy).  Say someone is xx, but gender neutral, I would view them as still a part of the "girls only" section.  We're all different, but we share the same x chromosome, and all perspectives are welcome.  It's not a gender thing to me.  Now if a person has xxy, then could they be a part of both "girls only" and "guys only", because according to their genetics they are both sexes (but not necessarily both genders).  I support having a "gender neutral" section, I just wouldn't want to be excluded from conversation.  But if it is popular enough, why not?  I think they ought to have one.

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Girl and boy are gender. You either see yourself as a boy or a girl. Sex is male or female. Someone can be biologically a male and see themselves as a girl, and a female can see themselves as a boy. A gender neutral person doesn't identify with either boy or girl, though they still technically have a sex. I can kind of see where virjizz is coming from. Our girls only and guys only sections do favor gender over sex. For zir, to join one of these sections would be to identify with one gender over the other. 

 

As for a gender neutral section, I see nothing wrong with it. I don't know many people who identify as gender neutral, but as with everything else I am very accepting of the idea. As for a gender neutral section, if more people wished for it I don't see why to not have one. As with the guys and girls, I suspect gender neutrals have their own issues they would want to talk about. I also think it would be interesting for virjizz, if ze was comfortable with it, to start up a ask a gender neutral topic for us to ask questions about gender neutral, since most of us aren't very exposed to gender neutrality and don't know very much about it. That way we could learn more about zir life and perspective.

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