wny

How Likely is it someone would Lie about being a Virgin?

34 posts in this topic

I'm not even trying to disrespect you mate, so cool off eh? I'm just saying that there are things that are much more important to the success of a couple's relationship than any physical attribute. To me, the mentality of purity is way more important than actual physical virginity, for example. I don't know you, and I don't know your relationship history, but most anyone who has had a meaningful relationship in their life will agree with me when I say it doesn't matter how physically attractive/compatible a person is unless they have the crucial emotional compatibility with you. 

But people are different, are they not? Can it not be that this is incredibly important to me, even if it isn't important to a lot of other people? Also, keep in mind that I never said emotional compatibility is not important. That is important to me, at least to a certain extent, as well.

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But people are different, are they not? Can it not be that this is incredibly important to me, even if it isn't important to a lot of other people? Also, keep in mind that I never said emotional compatibility is not important. That is important to me, at least to a certain extent, as well.

Okay, I'm glad to hear you say that because you were going after me like physical attractiveness is the only important thing out there, which it's not.

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Okay, I'm glad to hear you say that because you were going after me like physical attractiveness is the only important thing out there, which it's not.

I don't feel I was doing that at all, but if that was how you took it, then it was a misunderstanding.

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Sorry mate, I work for a lawyer and no lawyer in their right mind would touch that case with a 10 foot pole on those grounds. Irreconcileable differences, yes. She (or he) said they were a virgin and later admitted that they weren't? Nope.

Well then I guess annihilation is the next best option. That or castration. "IF I CAN'T BE YOUR FIRST ILL BE YOUR LAST!" MUAHAHAHAHAHA

Nah but in all seriousness...people get divorced over nothing all the time. You got the money the lawyers got the time. Divorces aren't what they used to be anymore. If Britney Spears can get married and divorced in a few days...I can get divorced over something serious. And I do think that's the most serious of all. Not only are you stealing a gift that could've been intended for someone else...you're lying before the marriage even begins on false pretenses. AT LEAST someone who cheats married with the intention of staying true and honest...in this sense, someone cheated with others because they are kept from you before you even started the marriage.

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Its a shame that some people would lie about this and it's hurtful. If I am reserved and waiting for my husband and so should he. I agree that some people do lie mostly men to talk to the girl into what they want and it is very shameful to hear this. Make them wait or tell them about the waiting and the guy will run for the hills. I have had some guy ask me straight up if I was a virgin? Yes I am, and the truth about him came out. Its very difficult to find a person waiting till marriage in a big city. People in big cities usually wont lie but brag about themselves being not. Its shameful to hear and honestly its creepy to me. I would run for the hills. I could totally relate to what one of the members mentioned in the forum above I will only marry and be with a Virgin man only or not with anyone at all. I believe God has made that one man for me or be by myself which is peaceful. I have a waiting period before marriage which would be sufficient to tell if he's a virgin or not. If he's getting to marry a pure person I should get a pure person too or be by myself. Not to mention its family culture, covenant with God, family and Myself. No matter how much anybody lies if a guy is playing you Truth comes out eventually.

Since we are being open and honest about opinions I have a strong opinion that Celebrities are the biggest liars. Nobody flaunts their virginity on TV in front of a audience its something personal or shared among liked members. Actors Beyonce' Please if you are one, be modest about it, a Victoria Secret Model, Football players these are all scams and unrelatable, I don't think they are virgins or WTM. I find that not just that difficult but impossible to believe. Sean "the bachelor" wife is the biggest phony and what is she trying to imply by "born again" Are you kidding me that's like She died and had a rebirth, just like you get one life you get one virginity! All these lies, scams and publicity stunts are really shameful and matter to someone that is a Virgin.

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I think you can tell if someone is being truthful about it or not by the way they conduct themselves overall. Is she an overall honest person? Does she act overly flirtatious? How confident does she appear when answering this question? I think even most nonvirgins would highly value honesty about this subject.

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Divorcing over virginity status seems and looks stupid and ridiculous, but that's just me. I would like to marry a virgin but I know it's highly unlikely that I won't. I would rather a person be completely honest with me than lie about it. I'm not marrying for virginity I'm marrying for love. Love starts with being honest and trusting each other. If a guy did lie to me I would like to know why.

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I think honesty is the biggest issue there. If they know it's a deal breaker for you, and they lie to your face...well, they're a liar, and I would have a hard time trusting them. A lie of omission would be harder to get upset about, especially if it was a deal breaker for me and I did not ask directly, or make it clear.

I fell in love with someone who is not a virgin, but he has been honest about it. Some of it has been very hard to hear, and there has been a time or two where I reconsidered our relationship. I have dealt and am still dealing with the jealousy, but I have decided to look at it this way: which is more important to me, that the man I marry never made a poor sexual choice, or that he is open and honest about his past, even if it could mean that he loses me?

So yeah, to sum up and not continue to go off topic, I think it is very possible for someone to be lying, but they are just dishonest people, which you'll figure out one way or another.

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I had a thought on this: perhaps mistrust isn't imminent in a relationship.

 

Anyone ever consider scheduling a date with their loved one by taking a polygraph together?  I've thought about that before.  One person comes up with all the questions they want verified from the other, and vice versa.  I would think it is the ultimate truth in a game of truth or dare.  Maybe it can even turn into a lot of fun between both parties.

 

I have seen jobs where a background check is required to acquire a job that might take up 5 - 10 years of one's life.  Some require security clearances.  Some require polygraphs.  If these are the things people are willing to do to get a job that is likely temporary, why not consider background checks, clearances and even polygraphs of a marriage meant for life?  The job is temporary, but the marriage should last.  How much more important it is to verify the authenticity of the partnership?

 

I love thinking about things like this.

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