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Guest markb4

What is the hardest thing about waiting?

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Hey all,

I've another question for y'all. What is the hardest thing for you regarding waiting? Is it the peer pressure, the loneliness, the fear that you won't get married, etc?

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"Is it the peer pressure, the loneliness, the fear that you won't get married, etc?"

all of those Mark. society and how sex is viewed so vicariously and how sexual promiscuity is everywhere, we're surrounded by it and so it sometimes doesn't seem worth it. like it makes me want to just give in because I get really sad about it but then I know I couldn't go through with it anyway so it feels like a lose -lose situation.

the loneliness because we're human and everyone longs for love and acceptance and being with in a good loving respectful relationship.

and I'm not worried that I won't get married there are plenty of options but marrying the right person with the same value system and beliefs is the catch.

and finally having the natural human desires is a battle as well and keeping your body in control gets tough sometimes too...

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I fear I won't get married and like OHG said the natural desires....it was easy for my grandparents because they were already married in their early 20s....I just hope by my

Late 20s?! Ahhhh!

Society makes it difficult because its like I'm keeping a secret only some friends know. You would be looked down upon for waiting unless talking to "right" kind of person who would "get" you.

Plus it is lonely becuase people who are not waiting tend to have more dates, relationships, while I'm going to bed lonely again

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Yeah, for me the human desires are a killer! Loneliness also plays a huge obstacle for me. Thankfully, I don't fall for peer pressure/societal stereotypes, so that's not a problem for me.

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Knowing that there are barely any women out there with Victorian standards. Woman are constantly becoming less and less desirable to me as it seems as time goes on, women tend to lose respect for themselves and give in more and more.

Knowing that there's that much less of a chance for my future wife to wait for me makes me just want to give in. But I'm trying for now.

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Knowing that there are barely any women out there with Victorian standards. Woman are constantly becoming less and less desirable to me as it seems as time goes on, women tend to lose respect for themselves and give in more and more.

Knowing that there's that much less of a chance for my future wife to wait for me makes me just want to give in. But I'm trying for now.

Connor,

To me it is the opposite. I personally know more girls than guys waiting. Also, this site for example. For awhile it definitly seemed more female than male dominated, and I"m not sure what it is now. I feel like I can find a guy who may wait with me, but has already had sex---that may end up being what I"m okay with but I'm worried that he'll compare me to the girl or two he had slept with beofre =(

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I wish I could compare if I knew more male or female waiters!

The hardest part for me is not knowing anyone else around my age who's waited or even has similar views about sex. I'm really lucky to have a great group of friends who are very supportive and respect my decision, but I do feel alone in the sense that I am the only one with this view. I sometimes find it difficult to relate to or give advice to my friends with "more experience" and definitely don't ever feel like I really get what they are going through when talking about relationships.

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I would say a combination of everything y'all have said. Alot of it for me is the feeling that I won't get married/find a wife,etc. I had a previous relationship (that I really thought had potential) basically end because of my desire to wait and her desire not to. I mean that wasn't the only reason but it was a major thing...talk about ripping your heart out and questioning your beliefs. But I've got through it and have had relatively better luck since and I know there's plenty of fish in the sea.

But its also the other things....like going to bed lonely, having "desires" that can't be rightly fulfilled outside of marriage. Feeling like everyone else is out there living it up lol. Can be a little depressing lol!

But what ultmately gets me through it is that I know it is what God wants. I know he has a plan for me (and each and every one of us here). And I know that in the end...it will be worth it beyond anything I can imagine. I know I won't be making comparisons, I know my wife will have a gift I've given no one else, and I know that it will make my future relationship with my wife that much better. I was listening to a sermon on this subject awhile back and the preacher (a waiter) was talking about how no matter what it takes...wait. It is worth everything you have to go through. B)

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So I just thought of this after reading your post DD....what is you alls opinion on sleeping together (literally) with someone?

Just curious is all, know everyone's will be a little different...

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I don't see anything wrong with sleeping with a girlfriend/boyfriend (in the technical sense lol!). I have spent the night with girls before and I actually think it can further the relationship in that you feel "closer" to that person, etc. But I will say this...too much can put you in a VERY tempting situation. I think spending the night once in a while or going away for a weekend is perfectly ok (if one can control themself lol) but when spending the night together becomes the norm rather than the exception I think it CAN lead to problems (not saying it will just depends on the relationship). Which, not to get into another subject, is my primary reason for being against living together before marriage.

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I agree. My roomie and her bf always spend the night, half here, half at his place. I think its too much. But that's my personal opinion, clearly I'm not going to share that :P

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Yeah, I don't agree w/sleeping together. I think it's wayyy too tempting. You may not even intend to do anything, but one accidental touch can lead to another and...the chain can continue.

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I think its better if u know others are home; at least for me it keeps me more accountable...what if they walk in? What if she needs to ask me something? Those can keep me in check as well...

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but I'm worried that he'll compare me to the girl or two he had slept with beofre =(

Sally: if he is the right guy, he won't compare you to anybody.

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Yeah, I don't agree w/sleeping together. I think it's wayyy too tempting. You may not even intend to do anything, but one accidental touch can lead to another and...the chain can continue

Agreed.

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1. Embarrassment over being a virgin.

Virginity is seen as a very uncool thing. Once you turn 13, let the peer pressure begin! I will never lose my virginity just for the sake of losing it, but I haven't found any pride or security in being a virgin yet. I'm a teenager in the wrong century.

2. Worrying that no guy will wait for me, especially guys I really really like

I know there are guys out there who will respect a girl's decision to wait, but I'd hate to lose a guy I truly love because he won't want to wait.

3. What if I never get married and then I die a virgin?

I do not want to die a virgin. Not because I think it's uncool, but because I do want to have sex (but only with my husband.)

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for me... the hardest thing about waiting is getting old. At times I feared I would be a withered up old prune and that my junk would go bad. Right now Im young and full of life and totally cute :) but you know what they say..."its all down hill from tomorrow". seriously though, I know its not all downhill and am very confident that the best of my past will be the worst of my future. I know that I will only get wiser with age and hopefully age like a fine wine ;) but in the end, Id rather wait and risk the chance of my junk going bad than to experiment now in the moment just for the sake of age...because a moment of passion can cause you a lifetime of pain...and that will make you age.

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for me... the hardest thing about waiting is getting old. At times I feared I would be a withered up old prune and that my junk would go bad. Right now Im young and full of life and totally cute :) but you know what they say..."its all down hill from tomorrow". seriously though, I know its not all downhill and am very confident that the best of my past will be the worst of my future. I know that I will only get wiser with age and hopefully age like a fine wine ;) but in the end, Id rather wait and risk the chance of my junk going bad than to experiment now in the moment just for the sake of age...because a moment of passion can cause you a lifetime of pain...and that will make you age.

hahah oh my, Ally, you and your sister say the funniest things! lol Cutest humor, adorable personalities ya'll make me laugh!

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