luxorcairo

Who here aspires to marry a wealthy man?

83 posts in this topic

I agree with Cyon....

 

Your love for the other person shouldn't run out as soon as the money runs out.

I just hope some of you here aren't ultimately saying, "When the money is gone, so is the relationship." or "Love lasts as long as money endures" or some other depressing things along those lines...lol

 

 

It definitely makes me proud to see a lot of independent, strong-willed women in here who are more than willing to pull themselves up by their own bootstraps though. lol That's how it should be.

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I agree with Cyon....

 

Your love for the other person shouldn't run out as soon as the money runs out.

I just hope some of you here aren't ultimately saying, "When the money is gone, so is the relationship." or "Love lasts as long as money endures" or some other depressing things along those lines...lol

 

 

It definitely makes me proud to see a lot of independent, strong-willed women in here who are more than willing to pull themselves up by their own bootstraps though. lol That's how it should be.

I feel it does run out as soon as money runs out. Sadly.

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@IYlatthew-To your point about people who grew up without much money being okay with not having a lot, I think the opposite can be true. I never had a lot of money growing up and that makes me realize that I don't want to live like how I did growing up.

 

True, but I think that's a separate issue than what I'm saying. I too am driven to make more money (much more) than my family had growing up, because not having much can indeed be hard and stressful, not to mention I want to try and do some things that would require money. I'm just saying that should I not reach that goal for some reason, or should the money run out in the future I will have first-hand knowledge that with the right perspective and attitude I could still maintain my happiness and love, if I'm married.

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I feel it does run out as soon as money runs out. Sadly.

 

Sadly indeed  :wacko:

That certainly isn't true for everyone, and hopefully it wouldn't turn out to be true for you. It's true that financial issues are one of (if not the) biggest factors leading to divorce, but I think it's because people don't have the proper outlook/priorities. Money running out could be a temporary rough patch. It'd be tragic to throw away a marriage when you could have come through that rough patch more in love and with a stronger bond than before. It happens.

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Whats even sadder is that some marriages run out! You've seen all the divorces its sad

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I will probably be making a good amount of money when I have a career, based off of my mom’s career (I’m basically her apprentice).  I would like the fact that me making a lot of money is a bonus, and not a requirement for dating/marriage consideration.

 And if the love "runs out" if a couple doesn't have much money, then what they had was weak relationship.I can’t add anything else without offending someone.

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A professors average salary is 100k+ thats goldigger? I just want extra money what if i lost my job? I need money to fall back on if times are hard. Maybe you need to look at my posts before you post huh? I thought so. You see, idk what you want in life. But i know i dont want to sit on the couch all day. By my profile pic, i wanna go to egypt. You think 30K gonna get me there? No! Call me greedy, selfish. Maybe youre intimidated that i can be brave can come out and say this while youre still in the shadows. I adore the riches and nice homes and louis vouitton and channel i said it! So now its time for you to jump out of this post if youre going to critisize, understand? Thank you

I think you're underestimating just how much money $100,000 per year is. That is a ton of money to make per year. If this is really what you're aiming for, you probably should marry a much older man. It would take years in a career to work your way up that high. True, there are some exceptions where you might find a guy in his 30s who already makes that much, but I think it would be pretty rare. Also, your estimate on professors sounds like it may be misleading. I mean, it's possible that is the average of professors, but you have to look farther than that. There are probably a few at the top who teach at top institutions who make a ton, but there are a lot more who make way less than that. That sounds more like what maybe some top and senior professors would make, but not your average professor. Also, keep in mind there is a difference between an adjunct professor, an assistant professor, an associate professor, and a full professor and that it takes a long time to finally become a full professor, ie. the person who will have a higher salary. Considering I'm going to enter a PhD program in about a year, I would like to think if I decide to become a professor that I could be making $100,000 per year within 10 years, but I just don't think that's true.

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I've experienced a complete lack of financial stability for a long period of time and it was scary, so I can understand the desire to be financially stable with two equivalent incomes. I don't think money can buy happiness, but it sure can make life a lot more fun. With that being said, I don't care how much money my husband makes. I happen to be going into medicine so I will always be able to find a job and support my family. I am going into a field that I love so I think its only fair my husband do the same. I don't want him to pursue a career that he hates just because it makes a lot of money, that was kind of a scary trend that I saw amongst the seniors at my high school and my classmates at university. If his dream was to be a musician and he only ever played for tips that would be fine by me as long as he was happy. The only stipulation I have in regards to money is that my husband better be okay with me helping my parents out, because I fully intend to take care of them in any way they need when they get older. I would of course extend the same courtesy to his parents. As long as he had a desire to learn new things, it wouldn't matter if he was overly ambitious with his career goals because we would get along just fine. I love my dad to bits and I didn't love him any less when he lost his job and couldn't support us completely, so I can't see money impacting the way I would feel about my husband either because it just isn't that important to me.

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I guess ive lived a sheltered life. Ive been cushioned, and my parents support whatever field i go onto, and whoever i marry. I dont see a problem with having a job you hate for the money. What if your dream job was to become a doctor. Its hard work but its your dream. If you could never go to work again and still get paid, would you? You gotta work for money. Youre practically a slave to it. So any job that pays well is nice because of the money IMO (just not science or math too difficult for me)

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@Missy i guess its just personal perspective. For some they can live a wonderful life with little money. Others cant. Because my ultimate dream needs money (i want to travel the world.)

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@IYlatthew-To your point about people who grew up without much money being okay with not having a lot, I think the opposite can be true. I never had a lot of money growing up and that makes me realize that I don't want to live like how I did growing up.

 

This is dead on! I would not say I grew up poor, but my family did struggle financially. My mother is a dental assistant and my father is a small business owner. Oftentimes my dad would go a month at a time without cashing his own paycheck so he could pay his employees, therefore my mom's part time income was the steady income. I saw firsthand how much financial stress can affect your life.

 

My parents always pushed education since they wanted my brother and I to have more financial security than they did. I am very independent and I believe a woman should be able to take care of herself if God forbid a husband lost his job, passed away, or you got divorced. My longtime boyfriend is an elementary school teacher so no I do not aspire to marry wealthy, but I do think a certain amount of money is needed to get by in life. Ultimately, I think it's most important to know how to live within your means and budget. To me if you don't have those skills, it really doesn't matter how much you make- using money wisely is more important.

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@Allison-Depending on where you live, elementary school teachers can make quite a bit. Around where I live I think their contract is the same as that of the middle and high school teachers. I've looked at their old contract on-line (since it's from taxpayer dollars, it's public information) and it was pretty good. I assume their new one is about the same or better, since I doubt the union would have accepted any substantial pay cuts.

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For me, its not so much a requirement that he's wealthy, but that he is responsible and has goals to support a family. Of course ideally I want to be financially stable and not have to worry about money too much, but I'm going to marry for love, not for money.

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Look I have mixed feelings on this one since mine are a mix of Justin Justice, Cyon Corell and WanderingWashingtonian. But I think one point that several people have hinted at with regards to themselves but never clearly stated is they themselves wish to be successful providers in order to secure a future for their family. I will say that I stand behind fully women who seek to follow their dreams to success by getting a degree and a good job.

Why? Well really from personal experience in my own life and I am not just referring to medical ailments. As with my case what happens if your parents divorce (single mom -thank God she had both a degree and a job) and suddenly one must now provide. Also what happens when that sole provider gets laid off when the market crashes....what then? Well it meant for me no more private school, working, and still working and trying to get a degree.

Look I don't regret this cause it has made me who I am; which is someone who for dam sure is gonna make sure he can provide for his family. On that note I hope my future wife is doing the same for herself...even though I would like to be making enough so if she choose to be a full time mother or work part time we would still be fine.

However while I feel one should aspire to be established and able to provide; I disagree with someone marrying anyone for money or seeking excess of wealth. Especially for money that provides luxury (i.e. sports cars) and not just security (i.e. insurance). Money may make the world go round but money dosen't bring happiness nor can you take it with you when you die. One should only marry someone out of love, respect, and spiritual connection and hope that either yourself or the person can afford enough to live happily and securely not nessarily in wealth and luxury.

**My two cents girls....since this is your section***

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However while I feel one should aspire to be established and able to provide; I disagree with someone marrying anyone for money or seeking excess of wealth. Especially for money that provides luxury (i.e. sports cars) and not just security (i.e. insurance). Money may make the world go round but money dosen't bring happiness nor can you take it with you when you die. One should only marry someone out of love, respect, and spiritual connection and hope that either yourself or the person can afford enough to live happily and securely not nessarily in wealth and luxury.

**My two cents girls....since this is your section***

Jordan....you pretty much said it all in that paragraph! Money doesn't buy happiness, nor does it buy a life or secruity for that matter. I saw this thread...immediatly this scripture came to mind, Ecclesiasties 10: 19 "A feast is made for laughter, and wine maketh merry: but money answereth all things". What this passage is saying....is that life is meant to be enjoyed, with all that it encompasses, money should not be the factor on which your joy is built, the scripture also says money will take care of lifes issues. Ie; bills, buying a home, providing for family etc. Money is designed to enhance your life. Its also meant to bless the church through tithes & offerings. Your giving back to God what he blessed you with, out of His abundance. I on the other hand don't aspire to marry a wealthy man. I aspire to marry a man with a wealth of God in his heart! Now, ask me do I want my future husband to finacially stable in his own wright....Yes. I hold myself to that same standard as well. Just as Jordan stated earlier...a relationship should be built on things much more solid, like trust, love, & commitment.. because if the money leaves...the relationship stands! And the two of you are able to rebuild on that foundation.
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However while I feel one should aspire to be established and able to provide; I disagree with someone marrying anyone for money or seeking excess of wealth. Especially for money that provides luxury (i.e. sports cars) and not just security (i.e. insurance). Money may make the world go round but money dosen't bring happiness nor can you take it with you when you die. One should only marry someone out of love, respect, and spiritual connection and hope that either yourself or the person can afford enough to live happily and securely not nessarily in wealth and luxury.

**My two cents girls....since this is your section***

 Pretty much what you've said. Although for me I look for someone who is financially responsible with whatever money they have. I hold myself to the same standard more than job security  because money and incomes can change rapidly and drastically. Because of how quickly a financial situation can change I look for someone with a willingness and creativity to do whatever needs to be done to meet  needs.  There have been many times in my life I have had to get creative to survive. I hope to  marry someone with that same spirit.

 

As Agarden  mentioned the real wealth and value of a  man/husband or woman/wife is what's in their heart and spirit.

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I wouldn't mind being the main provider if I had a good paying job, but I certainly wouldn't marry someone who sits around the house all day (that's too much like my uncle, not a pretty situation!). I think as long as a pair you make enough money to provide for your family, who cares about marrying someone wealthy?I my experience poorer people have more profound personalities.

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I think Professor is a realistic goal if that's who one wants to marry.  I used to be a teller at a bank and I would observe the professions of the people who had the most money.  There were many professors in the 6 digits (they worked at the University of Illinois). And there were many single doctors graduating from there too!
 

also unfortunately (sometimes) men can become very controlling when they are the main breadwinners and I just cant have that.

That statement is definitely true for some!!

 

Some people are broke because they don't handle money wisely.  This applies to the poor and the rich. (And for the Christians, the bible has a lot to say about handling money.)  When times are rough, being broke isn't so scary after all.  Especially if there are two adults to make ends meet (opposed to a single parent).  Wisdom is far more valuable than money, for that's what will keep you afloat if havoc affects the finances.  I've never been rich or even close to it, but I can say that I am currently quite poor but yet I live in abundance.  I have some great life skills.  I can make a dollar stretch.  I'll always have food and clothes in my closet and my daughter will never go without a need met.  I know how to survive.  I am not too prideful to hop on a bus if my car broke down and my household is not wasteful (we even recycle which is socially responsible).  If I can be happy and efficient with what little I have (even though being poor really isn't that bad in America) think about what I'd do with money if I had extra.  I would be so efficient that if crisis came my way, it wouldn't ruin me.  Most importantly, I wouldn't choose to be poor or without an education..  but it gives great perspective in life and for my future and that is invaluable.  To those who have never been of low-income.. they mostly could never truly understand what it is like and know that things are just things or be able to give up luxuries gracefully (like cable tv).  (but that's not true for everyone poor or rich)
Disclaimer: (there are many people in poverty that are horrible spenders and quite wasteful)

Ultimately, there are many professions that have huge salaries such as doctors and professors.  I think aiming to marry a man who makes that kind of salary is certainly attainable and I can respect that.  Having your own money is great too.  Planning your future financially in this regard is like a business strategy and we should be the CEO of our lives after all.  But what is most important in life?  What will you do after you are done fulfilling your own desires?  What will your existence contribute to society? (I personally would highly suggest sponsoring college scholarships like Dr. Ben Carson) Will you just travel to resorts or will you go to 3rd world countries? 

 

Considering a potential spouse's career skills and education are important.  Having a faithful, kind, humble man is most sufficient for me. 

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I think Professor is a realistic goal if that's who one wants to marry.  I used to be a teller at a bank and I would observe the professions of the people who had the most money.  There were many professors in the 6 digits (they worked at the University of Illinois). And there were many single doctors graduating from there too!

 

That statement is definitely true for some!!

 

Some people are broke because they don't handle money wisely.  This applies to the poor and the rich. (And for the Christians, the bible has a lot to say about handling money.)  When times are rough, being broke isn't so scary after all.  Especially if there are two adults to make ends meet (opposed to a single parent).  Wisdom is far more valuable than money, for that's what will keep you afloat if havoc affects the finances.  I've never been rich or even close to it, but I can say that I am currently quite poor but yet I live in abundance.  I have some great life skills.  I can make a dollar stretch.  I'll always have food and clothes in my closet and my daughter will never go without a need met.  I know how to survive.  I am not too prideful to hop on a bus if my car broke down and my household is not wasteful (we even recycle which is socially responsible).  If I can be happy and efficient with what little I have (even though being poor really isn't that bad in America) think about what I'd do with money if I had extra.  I would be so efficient that if crisis came my way, it wouldn't ruin me.  Most importantly, I wouldn't choose to be poor or without an education..  but it gives great perspective in life and for my future and that is invaluable.  To those who have never been of low-income.. they mostly could never truly understand what it is like and know that things are just things or be able to give up luxuries gracefully (like cable tv).  (but that's not true for everyone poor or rich)

Disclaimer: (there are many people in poverty that are horrible spenders and quite wasteful)

Ultimately, there are many professions that have huge salaries such as doctors and professors.  I think aiming to marry a man who makes that kind of salary is certainly attainable and I can respect that.  Having your own money is great too.  Planning your future financially in this regard is like a business strategy and we should be the CEO of our lives after all.  But what is most important in life?  What will you do after you are done fulfilling your own desires?  What will your existence contribute to society? (I personally would highly suggest sponsoring college scholarships like Dr. Ben Carson) Will you just travel to resorts or will you go to 3rd world countries? 

 

Considering a potential spouse's career skills and education are important.  Having a faithful, kind, humble man is most sufficient for me. 

 

I. LOVE. THIS!!!  ahem *golf clap

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I'd rather marry a guy from a poor family/background, they'd understand me a lot better I think. If he's worked hard to get where he is AFTER leaving his family that's fine. I'd prefer if my guy had/was aiming for some sort of successful career because that's what I'm aiming for and it makes things more equal.

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Of course I intend to be raking in the cheese (writers have pretty flexible schedules anyway!), but I don't know if I could tolerate being married to a material girl...considering the fact that the moment I say, "I do," she's entitled to damn near everything I am, legally.

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There are ways to protect your assets. One of them I do not recall at the moment exactly what it is but it involves using one of the States laws that you can more or less set it up as a trust that protects your assets from all creditors (which by law also means your spouse should you get divorce.)

 

I am going to research more on it, but the career I'm in I'll be making decent money, and seeing as how my Father ruined my mother's credit, as well as seeing a friend of out family's lose a ton of money since he is a successful attorney, I am a bit on the cautious side.

 

That doesn't mean I am going to be cheap. I'll set something up in case of an event I died, I'm not going to leave my spouse with nothing if I die, but I will arrange it so that it'll only be if I am married to my spouse in the event of my death. I will also account for some event that I go brain dead.

 

Hopefully she won't think of killing me to get money, :P

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