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Mike

How restrictive are you about saying "I love you"?

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How frugal are you about using the "love" word? I assign a lot of meaning to it, and I'm very selective about using it. To me it only has that heavy romantic meaning, which makes it uncomfortable for me to say in platonic/family/casual situations.

I've learned to just spit it out with Grandparents and stuff, but it always feels awkward to me. It's not that I don't feel lots of affection and appreciation for non-romantic relations...I just don't use THAT word for those particular kinds of positive feelings.

In relationships, I've only said it twice (out of six long-term relationships). Note that I mean I've only said it to two people. Once I've said it once I'll keep saying it.

I know. I'm weird. Anybody else?

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I'm very restrictive! lol I've never told anyone I've loved them. Well that's a lie. I have told someone maybe like "I love you for that" or "you're the best" kind of love thing. I actually get real awkward about it as I have a girl friend that everytime she calls me she makes me say I love you like she'll tell me I love you before she hangs up and I'll feel bad or rude for not saying it back so I say yeah love you too or something like that. but I def. agree with you I think it should be saved for romantic relationships only and I def. agree that if feels awkward otherwise or when you feel like you have to say it to be polite. I hope I get to tell someone that oneday♥

P.S.(that is sooo sweet that you like to keep saying it once you've said it! I'd love for a guy I"m with to always say it, it'd keep me happy for sure♥)

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Well there are many different types of loves as you said; romantic, platonic, family, etc. I only say it to someone if I'm close to them. My parents and I rarely exchange the words "I love you",but I do say it to my closest friends who are like family to me. It was awkward at first, but if a friend means a lot to me, I want to show them by saying I love them. Now we say it every now and then. Its only awkward when others question it. When that happens, we just explain that its friendly love. Its also my beliefs as well. The bible says that God is love so love is a strong word that isn't meant to mean solely romantic. I think when you love someone it means they are special to you and that you would do anything for them.

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I say it to my immediate family and my Grandparents and sometimes one of my Aunts---it's more like "love you' at the end of a phone convo as we're getting off the phone.

I also say it to a COUPLE friends.

I've never said it to a guy before. I know it will be a big deal when I do.

Mike: Daaaang EIGHT long term relationship??? gettin around ;) lol JK!!

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Mike: Daaaang EIGHT long term relationship??? gettin around ;) lol JK!!

bahahahah!!!! Sally!!! ur funny lol...but right, yeah Mike wth? ;) jk jk honestly I thought he said only two but I dunno maybe I'm confusing him w/ someone else lol

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I say it to all my family everytime I talk to them or see them, even when I was a teenager and I was out with my mates I would say love you on the phone to my family; if I love someone I don't care who knows.

Once I say it to a gf I would say it often because I want her to know how much she means to me but I don't know if I will wait until she says it first or say it to her first because when I fall for someone I know I will fall for her hard. Same with a gf I would say I love you to her in front of my mates and family because I don't care who knows that I love her.

-Aaron

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Awww, Aaron, both you and Mike are real sweet about that. I've yet to experience that, so I'm quite hesitant too. I want to make sure I really mean it and that I'm not rushing it.

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When I say those three little words I mean it. So I have to be in love before I'll I love you. They are not just words to throw around

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Mike: Daaaang EIGHT long term relationship??? gettin around lol JK!!
yeah Mike wth?

lol. Sorry, I miscounted. Corrected now. It's more like "five and half." For some reason I had the number "eight" in my head from the last time I tallied. Probably because that's the number of people I've dated, long term or no. Only 5 of them went longer than a few months, and one lasted exactly a few months, hence the ".5"

Still, I guess five long term relationships means that I do get around a little haha. FWIW, only one of those relationships (my favorite) was with another waiter.

I don't know if I will wait until she says it first or say it to her first

First one to say it has the balls! But only when it's mutual. Really, when you get to that point...you'll both already know.

I actually get real awkward about it as I have a girl friend that everytime she calls me she makes me say I love you like she'll tell me I love you before she hangs up and I'll feel bad or rude for not saying it back so I say yeah love you too or something like that.

Yes exactly! Thank you for making me feel less crazy. I have a friend exactly like that, and her pestering me to "say it back" two nights ago is what inspired me to make this post! What I've started doing instead is just giving her really nice compliments instead of saying it. Like, she'll say "Ok bye I love you!" and then stare at me and poke me for my response...and I'll say "The last three years of my life have been happier because you were in them." It seems to work. It think that's going to be my new policy. B)

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i wouldt date someone i didn't love. that being said there is a difference between loving someone and being in love with someone. tough i haven't had a boyfriend i loved or told one so yet. but im not really shy on the i love yous cuz im a loving person. i "LOVE" my best friends and that's how we end our phone calls :lol: but i guess when i am real in love with some one it will be hard to come up with a word to express what i mean :lol:

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OHG, he said he only said "I Love You" in two

no, I thought he had said at one time he had only dated two people but I think I misunderstood

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Chalk me up as another one who finds it a tad awkward to say to relatives and even parents, etc. I mean do I love them don't get me wrong I just don't say it as often as I should! :lol: I've only said it in one relationship ever and then we kept saying it after that until it ultimately ended. I take it very seriously and honestly I thought I loved her at the time. Looking back I'm really not sure...needless to say it will be awhile before I say it again...hopefully it's to my future wife!

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I have never told a girl "I love you". Once I say it there's no taking it back. If things get serious it would take me more than a month to say it. I have to be sure she is the one. I don't just throw the L word around. If however I'm married or in a serious long term relationship I'd say it at least everyday I'd imagine.

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I tell my friends, family, church family and children that I love them all of the time. If I feel love for someone I don't hesitate to tell them. There is no question about my feelings for you, I want you to know. Does it mean I'm in love with you? No. If I'm in love with you, you will already know and I will most certainly already told you that I love you in some capacity. Reciprocation? Only if you feel the same. It doesn't change my feelings. Life's to short...if you love someone, tell them!

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I'm pretty selective. I say "Love you" to my parents and grandparents, and I've said it to some aunts and uncles before. It would feel really weird to say it to my brothers, even though I do love them. I've never said it to a girl. I imagine that at some point in a relationship I will just know that I love this girl, and I'll say it with a lot of forethought and conviction.

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I only say it if I really mean it but it doesn't have to be romantic love. I tell my friend that I love them and my parents from time to time. I agree with Matt, it would be strange to tell my sisters that I love them even though I do. I tell my dog that I love her because she doesn't get all sappy on me. Lol

I have never told a guy that I love him except for relatives and a good family friend who was like a grandpa to me. I'm reluctant to tell my guy friends that I love them because it may sound strange. If I really felt the need I would make sure they know that it is a friendship kind of love.

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I say "I love you" to my parents every time we part, either when one of us is leaving the house, or when going to bed for the night. I've made a point of doing this for the last fifteen years or so. I started being intentional about it after learning that one of my mother's biggest regrets was not saying "I love you" as my grandmother left the house the night she died in a car accident; this happened when my mother was thirteen. Since hearing that story, I've wanted to make sure that one of the last things I say to people I care about is always "I love you," because it may be the last time I ever get to see them. "Bye! I love you!" is therefore my standard departure every morning, and I say, "Good night! I love you!" on my way to bed.

 

I also say "I love you" to extended family when departing from visits with them. Rarely but occasionally, I say it to best friends as well. Also, I am a teacher at a private Christian school where everyone says "I love you!" all the time, so it is something that we teachers all say to each other and our students on a regular basis. I teach cute little kindergartners, so loving them is pretty easy! Most of the time, anyway.

 

Now, as for the romantic use of "I love you," I have only said it with that meaning to one other person, and not until we had dated just shy of nine months. I knew for sure that I loved him enough to say it and mean it after three months, but I wanted to wait until I knew he loved me too; I did not want to scare him away.

 

I think that if people said "I love you" and meant it more frequently - not just romantically, but all the other kinds of love too - the world would probably be a better place.

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hmmm, well in my 33 years of living, i've never uttered these words to anybody but God, my dog, and when I watch the concert of my favorite singer. i think that's it. To emails, almost not. 

 

I feel awkward saying it upfront to people i love. I don't know why. hahaha. but i can say it when they are not looking

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