Tev

Crushes

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Lately I have had a crush on this one girl at my school for awhile and I heard through the grapevine that she likes me and have so for awhile. Now this girl is everything I've prayed for which was a strong, intelligent, young lady who is a follower of Christ. But lately I've been having my eye on another girl and I think I have a crush on her. In fact she is the reason why I am not in bed sleeping right now because I'm trying to figure out do I know anyone that knows who she is. Sounds kind of weird but this girl is very pretty and doesn't seem like she is one of those high maintenance teenagers and she seems really sweet even though I have never met her, I know she's a cheerleader and a pretty good one I might add. But my question is why do I have a crush on one girl for awhile and then when that feeling goes away, another crush comes up?. Is this normal? This has been happening to me since elementary school and its kind of a habit. Has anyone else experienced this? I highly favor your opinions :)

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Completely normal, I'd say. I've been a man of many crushes ever since I started liking girls, which almost predates my earliest memories (okay, a slight exaggeration). The fact is you are probably attracted to a variety of traits, so if you encounter a variety of girls, chances are you'll crush on more than one. Having a crush, especially in your high school years, is mostly a pleasant and exciting feeling (there are of course feelings of frustration and angst). So, when your feelings for one girl start waning, it probably won't be long before another girl catches your attention. My question is, have your feelings for the first girl completely gone away? If she seems to be exactly what you're looking for and she likes you back my advice would be to jump on the opportunity (well don't over do it). I was in a similar situation in high school, didn't make a move, and lived to regret it. But if you're completely focused on the second girl then I guess try and get to know her. But yeah, I think serial crushing is normal for a high school guy. lol

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But my question is why do I have a crush on one girl for awhile and then when that feeling goes away, another crush comes up?. Is this normal? This has been happening to me since elementary school and its kind of a habit. Has anyone else experienced this?

 

Yes, yes, and yes.

 

It's the way we're wired. One girl goes away, another one comes into the picture. Or, one girl doesn't go away, but another one still comes into the picture.

 

For mystic sage wisdom on the topic; feel free to PM me.

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Normal the only way it doesn't is when you really care deeply about a girl.

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Tev,

From a girls perspective, the thing that helps me is starting to get to know a guy. By getting to know them, the crush will either go away or only become stronger and I like more about them. So, DD is a great example of the latter ;)

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@matthew No my feelings towards the first girl haven't totally gone away I still like her and surprisingly she likes me so I think I'll get to no her better but I'm hesitant to go further with her. Reason being is because I don't want her to be with me and I ending up developing another crush on another girl while I'm already in a relationship with her. It's tough to explain kind of.... AHHHHHHHHHHHH! I need helpppppppp!!! :(

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I know what you're feeling Tev (Which is new, us being somewhat opposites). The easiest way to go about this would be simply to see if the second girl doesn't fit your criteria. I was never a man of exacting criteria myself however it seems that if you find out she's not a Christian, or waiting, or she does pagan worship every month on the full moon then clearly she's nothing more than a crush.

 

Of course, if the second girl does turn out to fit your criteria then you might have a problem. But if you get to know her better you should also have a basis to go off of for which one you like more. Just don't take too long or you'll lose the first girl before even finding out the second girl isn't your type. Also, one last warning. Try not to let the first girl see you with the second girl too often, a little jealousy isn't bad. However if you give off the impression that you only want the second girl then the first one will leave you be unless she REALLY likes you.

 

Just my two (phased out) cents.

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I think it's normal to have a crush on more than one woman at a time. When you pursue a relationship you choose one over the other, but before you're dating either of them it makes sense to be interested in them both. I don't know if I would say I have a crush on anyone, but even right now as I type I can think of two women that seem like they both might be nice to date.

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I might be strange but I have always only liked/ went on dates with one guy at a time. I have never felt like I missed out or anything either! Maybe it is just a girl thing? xP

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Its normal sweety. You can have crushes a numberous girls. You gotta figure out who you really like..which girl can you see yourself with

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I might be strange but I have always only liked/ went on dates with one guy at a time. I have never felt like I missed out or anything either! Maybe it is just a girl thing? xP

 

That's how I am too. I've never had a crush on more than one guy at a time. It feels like it is completely impossible for me to like more than one person at the same time. I'm not sure how common a feeling this is for us girls. But yeah if I like someone, it's like all my romantic feelings towards anyone else just auto-shuts off.

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Thank you for all you guys` opinions I thought I was the only one who was a serial crusher. But I have another problem I need you alls` help. So the girl I had a crush on, asked me through a mutual friend could she have my number and I said yes. We text for majority of the day and while we were texting she told me that she has had a crush on me for at least a year and a half.But what so strange to me is that when I would say something nice or give her a compliment, I don't get anything back. Like I don't get a "Awww, thank you you're so sweet" Nothing all I get is a thank you and a smiley face. Like on Valentine`s Day, that`s the day I gave her my number, I text her "I can't wait for tomorrowww" She replied "What's tomorrow?" I text back " I get to see you. Duh cutie ;)". And you know what she said back? She said "Oh yeahh. I forgot"........... Huh??????????? Now yesterday I text her does she truly feel the same way I do and she said "I'm pretty sure I do" And I told her that she hides it very well and she said it's because she's shy. But I told her, jokingly, "As much as I hear you talk in class, you mean to tell me that you're shy?" And she text back "Lol. Yeah because I don't like them like them so I don't be caring". And then this morning I text her "Good morning beautiful" with a smiley face and she text me back good morning with a kissy face. Then I asked her how was Fuddruckers because thats where she went to eat at last night. And she text back "Good", now is it me or is she just not that into me? Please I need your help

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Thank you for all you guys` opinions I thought I was the only one who was a serial crusher. But I have another problem I need you alls` help. So the girl I had a crush on, asked me through a mutual friend could she have my number and I said yes. We text for majority of the day and while we were texting she told me that she has had a crush on me for at least a year and a half.But what so strange to me is that when I would say something nice or give her a compliment, I don't get anything back. Like I don't get a "Awww, thank you you're so sweet" Nothing all I get is a thank you and a smiley face. Like on Valentine`s Day, that`s the day I gave her my number, I text her "I can't wait for tomorrowww" She replied "What's tomorrow?" I text back " I get to see you. Duh cutie ;)". And you know what she said back? She said "Oh yeahh. I forgot"........... Huh??????????? Now yesterday I text her does she truly feel the same way I do and she said "I'm pretty sure I do" And I told her that she hides it very well and she said it's because she's shy. But I told her, jokingly, "As much as I hear you talk in class, you mean to tell me that you're shy?" And she text back "Lol. Yeah because I don't like them like them so I don't be caring". And then this morning I text her "Good morning beautiful" with a smiley face and she text me back good morning with a kissy face. Then I asked her how was Fuddruckers because thats where she went to eat at last night. And she text back "Good", now is it me or is she just not that into me? Please I need your help

If you'll excuse me I will be sending a copy of this in along with my resume as a screenwriter for the next episode of some drama. Maybe Glee...

More to the point, she doesn't have to be writing a flirtatious text every time she texts you. Sometimes she's probably busy and only has time to text "good". Of course it would be much easier for us men if this wasn't the case but ah well. Why don't you try asking her out if you're not sure? If you leave it to long you'll be in the friend zone, and you really don't wanna be there. Worst that can happen is she turns you down, she's not going to ruin your reputation forever as tax for daring to try and ask her on a date. Trust me.

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  We text for majority of the day and while we were texting she told me that she has had a crush on me for at least a year and a half.

 

My biggest piece of advice would be to believe her. She says she likes you. Trust that.

 

Girls show their feelings in different ways, but the fact that she actually told you this was pretty bold, and probably took a lot of nerve. Girls can be shy around guys even when they are confident in other areas of their lives. If I am interested in a guy, he immediately becomes the most intimidating person in the world to me, at least until I know for sure that he feels the same way, and it is hard for me to feel certain about that.

 

Also, a lot of times, after we have confessed feelings for a guy, we girls become more distant, because we want to see if he feels the same; we worry that we have said too much, and do not want to seem clingy.

 

So yeah, nothing in life is a guarantee, but I think it is a pretty safe bet that when this girl says she has feelings for you, she means it. I would spend more time talking to her one on one, not texting; so much of communication is non-verbal, so when all you get are a few words, and no vocal tones, no facial expressions, and no body movements to go with, it is easy to feel lost or to misinterpret things. I would also recommend inviting her out for a simple date, if you are both old enough that your parents would approve of that. Spending some real time together will tell you pretty quickly how she feels about you and how you feel about her.

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Lol @Mirage sorry for the lonnnnnngggg story, and I did ask her out on a dat, bu, I don't want her to give me one word answers during a conversation though while we're on the date

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And here I was, thinking that only girls overthink these kinda things. Boy was I wrong :P

So how r you and the girl doing now Tev?

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