Sally

Make Love not Porn

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We should make this required reading around here. lol. I can't buy into the argument that porn enhances your sex life. If your sex life has gotten so dull that you need to watch other people do it, then the problem is deeper than sex. As someone who has struggled with porn, I can say firsthand that it is damaging and has given me a distorted view on what sex and beauty is. It does nothing good for the minds of anyone who watches it.

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Very interesting, it's true porn usually does not enhance a relationship. However I have heard of some couples who actually watch it together and use it to enhance their relationship.

However yes, it's best if one can just avoid pornography, it makes everything much easier.

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I totally agree and might read this, but on the same point I've heard that people on here have quite a kinky side for lack of a better word so what is the line?

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Dasboy1: it is to be kinky with your one and only love of your life...no watching others do things or involving other in your private relationship (my line anyway) so the name "make love, not porn is fitting"

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You know my motto? There's a time for making love and a time for a rumble in the jungle. Sex without love is as empty and hollow as love without sex.

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Sex without love is as empty and hollow as love without sex.

 

Love without sex is empty and hollow? I respectfully disagree, kind sir! While I imagine love with sex is wonderful, because sex is meant to be a physical manifestation of your love, I believe love can be fulfilling and rewarding and beautiful without sex. It isn't empty or hollow at all--on the contrary, I think it fills us to the brim with warmth and light and joy! 

 

Maybe I'm a tad idealistic. But I'm okay being a bit idealistic  :)

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Love without sex is empty and hollow? I respectfully disagree, kind sir! While I imagine love with sex is wonderful, because sex is meant to be a physical manifestation of your love, I believe love can be fulfilling and rewarding and beautiful without sex. It isn't empty or hollow at all--on the contrary, I think it fills us to the brim with warmth and light and joy! 

 

Maybe I'm a tad idealistic. But I'm okay being a bit idealistic  :)

 

I totally see where you're coming from, but I specifically meant marriage when I said love. Trust me, sexless marriages are like wounded horses. Sex has always been part of how men connect--my wife can say she loves me all she wants, but if we haven't gone at it in, say, months, lets just say I won't be so receptive. Because I wouldn't feel close to her. But during the wait, before marriage, you are correct of course. 

 

And yeah, be glad that you're idealistic. Its the mark of a good heart. ;)  

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Haven't read it, but it is a very solid idea. Porn is not a good representation of sex or intimacy because 90% of it is not romantic, loving, etc. Verbatim, it's "get used and pissed on." Both of which do not foster love and trust. Now if a couple has built trust in their marriage over time and are into that then, to each their own. 

The point remains, it's nothing but visual over-stimulation with a lot of creative editing. Relationships and marriages worked before porn, it stands to reason they can surely work without it. Determination and communication is what build the bridge.

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I totally see where you're coming from, but I specifically meant marriage when I said love. Trust me, sexless marriages are like wounded horses. Sex has always been part of how men connect--my wife can say she loves me all she wants, but if we haven't gone at it in, say, months, lets just say I won't be so receptive. Because I wouldn't feel close to her. But during the wait, before marriage, you are correct of course. 

 

And yeah, be glad that you're idealistic. Its the mark of a good heart. ;)  

This is one of the core differences between men and women.  A woman in a broken relationship will have a plummeting sex drive.

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I could be wrong but here are my two cents:  I think the reason women watch porn with their man is because "if you can't beat 'em, join 'em."  The fight against porn seems unrealistic sometimes, especially when you settle and are not looking for a man of considerable character (probably because you don't think it exists).

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I could be wrong but here are my two cents:  I think the reason women watch porn with their man is because "if you can't beat 'em, join 'em."  The fight against porn seems unrealistic sometimes, especially when you settle and are not looking for a man of considerable character (probably because you don't think it exists).

 

That's just sad. I think the two of the biggest lies society tells women is that no guy will wait for her and that guys can't control themselves sexually. We all know that there are plenty of guys who will wait and also guys are capable of controlling themselves, it's that most guys don't want to control themselves. They just want what feels good without taking on any of the responsibilities of it. The fact is, if a guy sees nothing wrong with watching porn, it just shows that his wife isn't enough for him and those guys should be avoided like the plague.

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This is one of the core differences between men and women.  A woman in a broken relationship will have a plummeting sex drive.

Golly honey, Truly interested. Why ?

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Looked at the preview. She doesn't really make a point I wasn't aware of already. Of course not everyone likes the same sexual acts. Every man, every woman--every person--has preferences. I do feel that porn can certainly give virgins a skewed perspective of what to expect, though.

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