Mike

Explain why you decided to wait in 5 lines or less [for the book]

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I chose to wait primarily because I am a Christain and wanted to follow a very important request from God..purity until marriage. I'm young (teens) so I ,in my environment, luckily don't really have that pressure to lose my virginity. I still had internal struggles of why I should even wait because I guess the hormones kicked in but after searching many sites and gathering many opinions and advice and thinking deeply on it, I decided I would wait for God, my future husband, and safety.

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When I was younger something dramatic happened to me. That mixed with the lack of proper social conditioning and a religious family led me down a road of romantic celibacy.

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For anything I say, can you please just say Sally? You can say my age too, but that is all I'm okay with.

I was very involved in my church youth group in high school. We talked about abstinence, purity, and waiting until marriage for sex. I never really had guy friends; I mostly hung out with other girls my age, so I didn't have my first date until I was 17. I was very committed to following my morals and values. While I am 22 now and I have changed a lot since i was 17, I still believe in waiting and making that experience happen with only one person.

 

 

I'm like Sally and would prefer my WTM alias tehehehe if it gets put in.

 

I chose to wait because of my Faith, my family, myself, and for my future spouse. I loved the idea of being pure for my husband and sharing something only he would get to experience in a very recluse moment and sharing a side of myself that only he would know  and also because I freakin' love being a virgin! OHG-23♥

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I didn't really decide, it's something I always knew I'd do because it felt right for me and the idea of being sexually intimate with more than one person didn't feel right for me. Growing up and discovering how so many men are primarily after one thing helped cement my belief as sex feels like the very last thing a couple should share not the first and I refuse to be used, disposed of and hurt like so many women out there. I couldn't cope with that pain.

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I respect myself. I was always taught my body is a temple and I have it until I die. I figured any guy who respected me would respect me enough to wait for sex. So I decided the ultimate test would to see if they wait until marriage for me. Plus, there are too many emotions involved with sex, and I want to only share those emotions with one person. 

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My decision to wait until marriage (I'm married now, so my waiting is done!) has been shaped by my faith.  I believe that consensual sex deeply connects or bonds two individuals regardless of the intentions of the individuals.  This is the idea of "one flesh" that the Bible talks about.  Therefore I believe that the best context for sexual activity is one which can support the deep connection or bond that is formed.  Another way of putting it is that the level of intimacy should match the level of commitment in the relationship. I am glad that my husband and I waited and so far my own experience has only confirmed my beliefs about sex.  - Shane, 38

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At the age of 5 i was riding my newly bought bike for my birthday, i rode it down the back allies to a junction and that is when it hit me, i was asked “will you follow me or another rout?†consequentially i agreed to make a solemn vow there and then to follow the way of honor.

 

That way continues to expand and educate me, its a promise that you become more aware of each year but the basis is relatively simple, The 10 commandants, this includes purity from sexual immortality the best we can manage.

 

I also vowed if i “willingly†broke this i would forfeit my own life, a unique perhaps twist to the story.

 

Zatyrael / Andrew, 28 and still looking ;)

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I decided to wait til marriage because in my opinion sex should be treated as something special and not just casual. i also wanted to obey God and honor my future husband. It isn't always easy but I am almost 35 and still waiting.

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Waiting til marriage was a value I was raised with, but my decision to wait was purely personal. It most probably stemmed from me being a hopeless romantic. I always equated sex with love, and I would only want to share that experience with my one true love, forever. The only way to know that it's really love (and not purely hormones) is to wait until marriage. In the meantime, it allows me to have a clearer view  on other aspects of the relationship to determine if my significant other and I are compatible for the long-run, to see if he is "The One" whom I want to share my life with.

 

~Jeanne-Elise, 27

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It feels like alot of people here are fairly young.  I'm almost 30 now and still waiting although I have messed up in other ways, as in I haven't been very sexually pure overall, I just haven't had intercourse.   Does that count?  I don't know anymore.  I'm technically still a virgin sure, you see I think this is why it gets a bit complicated.  Anyway I've already shared my story or should I say my never ending struggle - http://forums.waitingtillmarriage.org/topic/2694-almost-30-and-still-waiting/

 

 

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Sex is the strongest link between two people in my opinion. I could never feel complete attachment to a woman who had previously lost her virginity. I wouldn't feel special to her. If she gave it to somebody else so easily what makes me so much more special? I believe it would be unfair to hold myself to a different standard. If I hold women to that standard I expect myself to live up to that standard. It would be unfair to do otherwise. That is why I choose to wait.

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I decided to wait because I believe that sex is the ultimate bond that two people can have and I want to reserve that bond solely for the man I marry.

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I decided to wait because the idea of sex, for me, involved love. I want to be completly in love with the person I ultimately decide to do it with, and only them. For me, sex is entirely an emotional experience and It physically sickens me to think that people can do it without that emotional attachment. I wait because it is the right thing for me, and it makes me proud that I can give this gift to my husband and not have it be any less because it was given to him and only him.

Sabrina, 20

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I decided to wait because my desire for marriage and love are a lot greater than my desire for sex. I want my first time to be special and comfortable with my soul mate. My husband is the only person who deserves to know me in that type of way. 

 

-Victoria, 19

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I decided to wait because I am a Real Christian at heart who actually wants a loving relationship.

What's the point of seriously being together and getting married if you just have sex regardless?

Sex is an intimate and special thing - not some kind of game.

Marriage is a true commitment - not a "legal contract" for "benefits" or so.

I will ALWAYS choose to wait until marriage - and quite frankly, I don't care if I die a virgin because so as that just means that no one is worth loving within my life time - and if that's the case, it would've never been love in the first place.

 

"T.Bold", 19

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At my middle school they only talked about protective sex, but only in a way that talks about early pregnancy. All schools I went to never talked about std's or any of the sex disadvantages other than pregnancy from not using a condom. Rebecca St. James inspired me when I was 15(7 years ago), shortly before my first boyfriend, and I've been waiting since then.

 

 

I think we should all inspire others to wait. Many people don't even know about it.

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My religion encourages WTM. But waiting seems the right thing to do anyway. Sex should be if both are in love, but this love is strengthened by marriage because then you can only leave if things get REALLY bad. Seems like a good idea. I dont see the point in screwing people you don't love and also having sex with a girlfriend might be good for a time but if there is no committment (marriage) then it still is a risky thing because some people just don't give a crap about a relationship after sex. Hence, WTM'ing

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Mike, how's the book going so far? Looks like you have some awesome quotes so far about why people decided to wait :D

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Religion played bug part in my decision, but I quickly became determined not to be a statistic in Teen pregnancy. And now as a high schooler all I ever hear from my peers is "sex ruins everything" and it gives me pride to know I haven't even hadn't first kiss, let alone ruined something with sex.

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**Religion played big part in my decision, but I quickly became determined not to be a statistic in Teen pregnancy. And now as a high schooler all I ever hear from my peers is "sex ruins everything" and it gives me pride to know I haven't even hadn't first kiss, let alone ruined something with sex.

-Lela, age:16

(Sorry for 2 posts I noticed I didn't put my name and age and also that I had a couple typos!)

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My Hindu relgion and personal beleifs have been a big part in waiting for marraige  I never even had my first kiss I also never drank alchool, smoked or did drugs because of my personal belifs and upbringing.  I am very pride of waiting till marriage and abstraing from alchool,smoking and drugs. I just wish more girls shared simlair beliefs.

Kart,27@kart180

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Good to hear that you are standing strong with your beliefs. I wish there were more girls like you. Teen pregency does ruin everthing because the mother is unprepared and that is why women should wait for having a child.

**Religion played big part in my decision, but I quickly became determined not to be a statistic in Teen pregnancy. And now as a high schooler all I ever hear from my peers is "sex ruins everything" and it gives me pride to know I haven't even hadn't first kiss, let alone ruined something with sex.
-Lela, age:16

(Sorry for 2 posts I noticed I didn't put my name and age and also that I had a couple typos!)

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"WTMs : frustrated unrealistics." say the ones against. What about respect? How can you love someone truly if you start giving bits of love to everyone? How can someone love you the same way s/he loved others while telling you're the best/the one? What is the difference? In our society, "trends", "fast", and "consumption" rule. I don't want to do things because they're trendy. It's my standard, not a choice. People may have different ones. I want to build love on an unique person, not stitch disappointing memories together. I'm not frustrated, I don't mind talking about sex. I'm not unrealistic, I'm conscientious about my future soul mate and about our happiness. Be yours, not others'.

- Phil, 24

 

 

People can tell you whatever they want, do whatever they want. You're yourself. You don't need explanations to them. Be yourself. It's harder to be a you standing out for your uniqueness rather than be lost in the crowd. :)

 

Stand proud by your values. They are what make you so special. ^_^

 

Edit: Woops, a bit over the five lines.

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I came to the conclusion after 3 children, and 2 failed marriages that I wanted God to be the author and finisher of my faith and I didn't want to do things my way any more. I had submitted myself to the ways of the world for so long and I decided to Trust God and do things in my life according to his plan. Amazingly, it has been a wonderful journey these last few years. In making the decision to be celibate it has really opened my eyes to how you can be ostracized for being different, but yet it makes me feel so good to stand firm on what I believe in. Even though my focus is not looking for someone for me but to give support to others that made the decision to Stand, I believe that regardless of my past mistakes that the man for me will find me and he will fall in love with my heart and see that beautiful spirit that lives inside of me first before he even takes notice of the vessel that I was blessed with being embodied in.

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