wny

Dating an Older Guy

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How do women feel about dating an older man? I don't mean much older, but say, at most, 10 years older. I ask this because I've been thinking lately that I probably won't get married until my very late 20s or early 30s. Furthermore, I'm only interested in marrying a fellow virgin. These two facts combined have me thinking that I most likely will have to date younger women (I wouldn't go below 22), as most women will have had sex by their late 20s and early 30s. So, I'm wondering if a 30 year old would come off as an "old" man to a younger woman. Would most younger women stay away from someone that much older?

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i am really into older men.

I could never see myself dating someone my age actually lol.

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How do women feel about dating an older man? I don't mean much older, but say, at most, 10 years older. I ask this because I've been thinking lately that I probably won't get married until my very late 20s or early 30s. Furthermore, I'm only interested in marrying a fellow virgin. These two facts combined have me thinking that I most likely will have to date younger women (I wouldn't go below 22), as most women will have had sex by their late 20s and early 30s. So, I'm wondering if a 30 year old would come off as an "old" man to a younger woman. Would most younger women stay away from someone that much older?

I think there are many young women out there who are open to dating...and marrying...an older man. I think it's about preference and chemistry. But, I also believe that it is possible that you could meet a woman closer to your age who is a virgin, if that is important to you. Finding a community like WTM has given me faith that there are many people out there - young and older - who share our desire to wait. I'm sure you also know that younger women aren't necessarily going to be virgins...in this society, people are having sex at a very young age.

For the record, the man who is courting me is 11 years my senior. I tend to be attracted to older men.

:P

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hi, I think most women do not mind dating or marrying older men. But hun dont count your chickens before they hatch. It is very possible that you will meet someone in your age group who is waiting just like you. I mean just take this website for example, this very site is an indication that waiting to have sex until marriage is not as archaic as most might think. Keep your spirits up :)

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I think most women prefer older men anyways, which works our because most guys prefer younger women. I also think age difference matters less the older you get so no worries there.

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It wouldn't bother me to date an older guy at all. But then again, it hasn't bothered me to date (like literally go on a date with) younger guys, either. I'm 24 (25 in December) and I've had a date with, or have "talked to" guys in the age range of 21-31. No big deal. Haha... But I must say I'd much rather prefer to settle down with a guy who is at least my age if not 4-6 years older. :)

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Thanks for the input. I do realize that it's possible to meet an older female virgin, but I feel like it would be naive of me to not realize that statistically it's unlikely. There are other reasons why I feel it would make sense for me to marry a younger woman too, though. First, I'm not interested in having children until I feel as though I'm financially content. Due to my career choice and my defintion of financial contentedness, this probably won't be until I'm about 40. I feel like a 22-25 year old woman would be much more willing to wait 10 years for children than a fellow 30 year old. Secondly, and much less importantly, there is an appeal toward marrying a younger woman as she will likely retain her youthful looks for more years than an older woman. This is much less important, but it would be a lie to say it never crossed my mind. Like I said, not a big issue, but still a perk that I've thought of.

My main argument against marrying a youner woman would be fear of a lack of compatibility. I've always been told and have felt like I'm very mature for my age (I'm currently college-aged.) Keep in mind I don't mean "mature for a guy," but mature in general, regardless of gender. I would fear that at 30 I'd only be more mature and that it would be incredibly difficult to find a woman in her earlier 20s that is as mature as I would be at 30. My own mother has even told me that she can't imagine me marrying a younger woman. So, that certainly is a concern of mine.

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As a doddering old coot that is significantly more aged than most of the people on this site, I cannot help but give this thread the highest marks.

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How do women feel about dating an older man? I don't mean much older, but say, at most, 10 years older. I ask this because I've been thinking lately that I probably won't get married until my very late 20s or early 30s. Furthermore, I'm only interested in marrying a fellow virgin. These two facts combined have me thinking that I most likely will have to date younger women (I wouldn't go below 22), as most women will have had sex by their late 20s and early 30s. So, I'm wondering if a 30 year old would come off as an "old" man to a younger woman. Would most younger women stay away from someone that much older?

I'm not a woman, but I'll give you my two cents anyway.

There are plenty of women, even on this forum, who insist on marrying older men (even much older). Which is a big problem for me because that means I might be left in the desert until 10(?) years from now :( and by then, there won't be many virgin women close to my own age out there. I, for the record, am totally open to dating older women.

So, although I prefer women close to my own age, I get where you're coming from.

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Age doesn't matter much to me :)! That being said, for some reason I always end up being interested in slightly younger men :D-I don't know how old they are at the beginning, and then find out-doesn't bother me. It all depends on compatibility and maturity. It would also be dangerous for a 30 year old woman to wait 10 years to have children-it is a myth that it is easy to have children in your 40s.

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I prefer older guys, but not that much older. I'd say up to 7 or 8 years apart, no more than that. I don't consider a 30 year old an "old" man.

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Age doesn't matter much to me :)! That being said, for some reason I always end up being interested in slightly younger men :D-I don't know how old they are at the beginning, and then find out-doesn't bother me. It all depends on compatibility and maturity. It would also be dangerous for a 30 year old woman to wait 10 years to have children-it is a myth that it is easy to have children in your 40s.

Like I said, this is why I think it will probably make sense for me to one day marry a younger woman. It is possible that I meet a woman my age who is a virgin and who makes good money, though, which would allow for me to have children at a younger age. This would maybe be the most ideal situation as I worry about finding a younger woman who would be as mature as I am. So, I guess the question is one of what is more likely; a woman who is in her very late 20s/early 30s who is a virgin, or a 22-25 year old virgin woman who is mature?

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I honestly wouldn't worry about it too much. One day you will meet the one and you won't care whether she is older or younge, especially since you don't seem to care that much about age. I wouldn't set your sights on the age she is. Should it matter how I feel about dating older men or if I believe you should date within your age? No, all that matters in the end is that she and you love each other. As for the maturity issue, I wouldn't even worry about it. You're not the only one is more mature for your age, so it is possible you will meet someone else that is more mature also. I am also more mature for my age. I am 20 and I consistently hang out with people anywhere from a year to three years older than me. For the longest time I had hard time because I was wanting my age group to accept me, but then I realized it shouldn't matter. As long as I am happy with my friends, should it matter their age. Same for you, as long as your happy in the end, does it matter? I wouldn't worry about the odds of her being this or her being that. Don't get caught up on the little facts.

Just for fun, my answer to your original question. I see myself marrying a man closer to my age. I don't really see myself marrying a man more than 3 years older than me. But that is just personal preference.

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I honestly wouldn't worry about it too much. One day you will meet the one and you won't care whether she is older or younge, especially since you don't seem to care that much about age. I wouldn't set your sights on the age she is. Should it matter how I feel about dating older men or if I believe you should date within your age? No, all that matters in the end is that she and you love each other. As for the maturity issue, I wouldn't even worry about it. You're not the only one is more mature for your age, so it is possible you will meet someone else that is more mature also. I am also more mature for my age. I am 20 and I consistently hang out with people anywhere from a year to three years older than me. For the longest time I had hard time because I was wanting my age group to accept me, but then I realized it shouldn't matter. As long as I am happy with my friends, should it matter their age. Same for you, as long as your happy in the end, does it matter? I wouldn't worry about the odds of her being this or her being that. Don't get caught up on the little facts.

Just for fun, my answer to your original question. I see myself marrying a man closer to my age. I don't really see myself marrying a man more than 3 years older than me. But that is just personal preference.

You're right that age does not matter to me in and of itself, but there are factors that play into age that very much matter. I've mentioned three factors that are not at all little facts. One is virginty, which, statisically, a younger woman is much more likely to still have. Second is willingness to wait for children, which a younger woman is much more likely to have. Third is maturity, which sure enough, some young women have, but many more older women have. In trying to find an ideal spouse, I feel it makes sense to try to target an age group that will most likely have the combination of factors I want in a spouse. I would not want to waste time targeting women my age and have 5 relationships in a row fail because none are virgins. But, I would also worry about targeting younger women as I could find that 5 relationships in a row fail as I find none of the women are at all mature. I'm trying to figure out which age group is less likely to end up in failure for me (well, my future self I guess). While I wouldn't specifically stay away from someone because of age, I feel it is more logical for me to target an age group that will most likely be most compatible with my desires instead of targeting an age group where I am more likely to constantly be met with failure.

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Like I said, this is why I think it will probably make sense for me to one day marry a younger woman. It is possible that I meet a woman my age who is a virgin and who makes good money, though, which would allow for me to have children at a younger age. This would maybe be the most ideal situation as I worry about finding a younger woman who would be as mature as I am. So, I guess the question is one of what is more likely; a woman who is in her very late 20s/early 30s who is a virgin, or a 22-25 year old virgin woman who is mature?

Probably a 22-25 year old virgin who is mature. I was always more mature for my age as well. I would sit with my mom and listen to her conversations with adults instead of play sometimes when I was little :lol:. However, there are women in their late 20s and early 30s who are still virgins, but might not be willing to put off children for too long. I think a good place to find both would be in a church singles group or Christian/Catholic dating websites. There is also an article on this site that has a dating website specifically for people who are WTM :).

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Well if you asked me before I'd say I prefer an older guy but the guy I'm dating is actually a few years younger than me! lol I was inspired to give a younger guy a chance due to this site however my advice would be to be open to both younger, around your age, or older you never know what person your missing out on. I've dated an older guy before, he was good to me, but this one-he's my soulmate♥

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I've always liked older guys. I was never really interested in guys my own age. I don't think 30-35 is old at all. Age is just a number.

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Age isn't really a big deal to me. I would be perfectly willing to date/marry an older guy and the same applies to a guy that is the same age as me. All of my brothers are at least 8 years older than me, so I have always been comfortable around people that are older than me. I don't know that I would want to date somebody younger than myself. I've gone through a lot of things that have forced me to mature faster than normal, so I don't know how compatible I would be with somebody younger than me.

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I'm 19, so I wouldn't date a guy 10 years older than me until I was 20. I am very mature and wise for my age, so 10 years wouldn't be too much, but a guy 10 years older than me is most likely going to want children in the next 3-5 years which I am so not ready for yet. So for that reason, it probably wouldn't work. I'd go with 5-7 years. 10 only if I knew for certain that he was in no rush to have children. I would feel more comfortable dating an older guy because he'd be more mature, less likely to pressure me for sex, most likely to have a good job, and he'd be better with serious relationships.

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The answers in this thread have given me some hope. I think at least part of the reason I wonder about this a lot is because I won't know for certain until I try and that could be 7-10 years away for me! It can be tough waiting to date (though, it has not been too too tough for me yet) but I really do feel that dating right now would be a very poor choice for me. I guess you never know, but I really do expect to be in for a long wait until dating is a realisitic option for me.

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I've never dated an older guy but as long as he has a youthful spirit I would date him :-). I have a friend who is a 26 yr old virgin so you can still meet virgins past 23 :-). And I have a friend who is 23 and ever since she was 22 she has dated guys 28 and up to 35

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Honestly, I LOVE older guys, they are awesome, haha. No offense to the younger folks on here!!

Kindof embarrassing for me to say, but 30s-early 50s Im usually attracted to. Its pretty sucky I gotta wait a ton of years before I can date em , haha.

I am also worried that the older guys get, the more likely they are not virgins anymore. But if its the right guy, then I think I can get past that!

What do you guys think about the maximum age difference in dating? Like 18 and 30? I would want to date a guy around that age, but I would think its strange that theyd date a way younger girl, ya know? They say the formula is half your age plus 7.

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Honestly, I LOVE older guys, they are awesome, haha. No offense to the younger folks on here!!

Kindof embarrassing for me to say, but 30s-early 50s Im usually attracted to. Its pretty sucky I gotta wait a ton of years before I can date em , haha.

I am also worried that the older guys get, the more likely they are not virgins anymore. But if its the right guy, then I think I can get past that!

What do you guys think about the maximum age difference in dating? Like 18 and 30? I would want to date a guy around that age, but I would think its strange that theyd date a way younger girl, ya know? They say the formula is half your age plus 7.

I actually like that formula quite a bit. I'm not saying it is always right, as I'm sure people will point to exceptions, but I like it. You're absolutely right that it will be harder to find an older guy that is a virgin, though. Part of the reason I imagine I will be looking for younger women when I'm in my late 20s and early 30s is because I expect that very few (maybe 5% if I'm lucky) of women in my age range will be virgins. Another reason is that I feel my financial goals will be more compatible with a younger woman. Also, as I have said before, my desire to put off having children is likely more compatible with a younger woman.

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