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Would you marry someone with different political views?

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Similar to April's thread asking if you would marry someone of a different religion. This is pretty self explanatory. First off, describe your general views on politics. How much difference would you tolerate in a spouse? What are certain issues you refuse to compromise on?

For me, I am somewhat libertarian. I believe people should be free to live their lives free from government intervention unless it directly interfere's with another person's rights and safety. I would say I'm more open to marrying a conservative than a liberal, but that's not an absolute either way.

When it comes to fiscal issues, I can tolerate a good amount of differences. Like if I believed the economy should be run one way and my wife thinks another way, I don't think it really impacts my marriage in any meaningful way.

On socials issues it's kind of mixed bag. I couldn't care less where she stood on gay marriage, because frankly I don't care either way. Abortion is the big one I can't compromise on because it could directly impact our future with kids. She must be pro-life for me to marry her. She doesn't have to like guns, but I cannot marry someone who believes in either banning guns or tightly restrictive gun control. To me, that is a great offense to my lifestyle as a gun owner. I am passionately pro-gun rights and a staunch supporter of the Second Amendment. If she was a vegetarian for "moral" (I view it as immoral) reasons, I would be fine as long as she respected that I eat meat. I don't think I could marry a vegan though. I'm not saying never, I'm saying it's highly unlikely. I hate to stereotype, but the vegans I know tend to be very fanatical about animal rights and do not tolerate eating meat at all. Which would explain why they take the extra step in refusing ALL animal products.

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I will honestly say I know nothing about politics. My parents have never expressed political views (if they even have any.) And by politics I mean government stuff.

But my husband definitely has to support gay marriage (or at the very least he can not have anything against gays) and absolutely must be pro-choice. Or at least neutral. As for gun control...well I'm a Canadian in Canada, so whatever. Very strict gun control here and I highly doubt that will ever change, so his opinions on that subject don't matter. It doesn't matter to me what his diet is as long as he never tries to influence me. I mean I totally understand if he wants to make me a favourite vegetarian or vegan meal of his, but he just can't try to convert me permanently to the diet. I rarely eat meat besides chicken and beef anyways. I follow a non-strict kosher Jewish diet, so it would make me a major hypocrite if I refused to date a guy because he was a vegetarian or a paleolithic dieter.

And yeah, you're kind of right about vegans. I mean I've met some really cool ones, but there are definitely ones that can get a bit crazy.

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Well, there's a few issues he's got to agree with me on, but they're mostly related to my religious beliefs e.g. he's got to be pro-life, and against contraception and assisted reproductive technologies like IVF and surrogacy (those aren't really political issues, but you get what I mean, it's the same kind of idea)

Other than that...We don't really have the kind of two party system in the UK where one is conservative and one is liberal. All the parties are pretty much the same, if I'm honest. I'm not too fussed about him disagreeing about trivial stuff like how the government should spend their budget, or who gets taxed the most, or if Scotland should go independent or not. That's probably not going to be an issue so much...

xxx

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I'm a mix of conservative and libertarian. Libertarian, since the government shouldn't have a One Ring of Power to do what is good, because another leader's idea of good may not be good, and a One Ring of absolute power ultimately will corrupt. But conservative, because I believe there are morals and values that must be upheld, such as not allowing abortion for the sake of convenience, or overturning centuries of marital tradition to cater to the interests of a few. I believe in individual rights, freedoms and liberties. These are some very fundamental issues which speak to the core of where one's values come from. If they don't come from the same source, there would be disunity of opinion amongst ourselves, and discord when it comes to raising our children.

I have already contributed a fair share of action to the political world, and furthermore, I sense a calling from God to carry this training through by running for office one day.

Therefore, not only do I seek someone of like mind on politics, but in the back of my mind, I have a terrible hint of the idea that whomever I find must be equal to the task of Senator's Wife.

That being said, there is room to negotiate on things like gun rights, prison policies, drug legalization, etc. I get along splendidly with a good many liberals, and many of them find themselves swayed towards my opinion (or, as I call it, "the truth") when we talk. :)

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I've never really been into politics and have never voted (i know terrible) I may take more interest into the next election but probably not. Country wide elections are pretty much won in the east, since there's so many more seats in just Toronto than all of BC... And it seems like it doesn't matter who's in power, everyone just complains about what they do and how other ppl are better anyways. So yea I don't put much thought into politics hah.

Chance are i'd just vote for whoever she chooses since I don't really care that much.

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I would. I'm a conservative but I'm more concerned with being on the same page religiously and sex-wise than politically....thats kind of an afterthought honestly. I mean I would definitely prefer her to at least be pro-life (but only dating Christians usually means they are).

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I would. I'm a conservative but I'm more concerned with being on the same page religiously and sex-wise than politically....thats kind of an afterthought honestly. I mean I would definitely prefer her to at least be pro-life (but only dating Christians usually means they are).

agree there are some things i would want to be the same on for religious reasons. But there could be some differences politically and it could be ok. Maybe my future husband would actually help me have more interest in politics---being out of my country of citizenship, I tend to focus on other things.

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I'm a libertarian. I generally get along better with liberals than conservatives for obvious reasons: we're on the same side regarding most social issues. and lord knows social issues are easy to discuss--you don't need a degree to debate the legalization of gay marriage. it's hard to get into a fight with someone over economic/fiscal issues, as most people are content remaining blissfully unaware about these types of things. we tend to gravitate towards people with similar social views as ourselves. it's just how it is.

that said, of course I'm willing to marry someone with varying political views than myself. love is blind, man.

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Abortion is the one issue I will never compromise on. If you think it's acceptable to end the life of an infant because it's not born, no ring!

There are a few other issues I'm reluctant to compromise on, though.

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It depends on if the person is an extremist. I can't really say if I am a conservative or libertarian nor do I really want that label. I find that such labels uncomfortable because I feel like I'm being boxed into a certain view of ideals and thus being stereotyped. I do have political stances though. They are mostly religiously influenced and while I follow the rule that everyone has the right to do what they want as long as it doesn't hurt someone else I believe there are still some ethics and morals that should be influenced in the political atmosphere. Plus that rule is broken a lot IMO, I think it is impossible in some cases to do something to yourself and not harm others such as family or friends who care- emotional pain counts in my book.

I'm actually more neutral on gay marriage- as long as no one pushes anything on me it's not my right to judge, I'll leave that to a higher power.It wouldn't really bother me what my husband thought as long as it isn't extreme. I think I am pro-life but I can understand certain circumstances such as rape. I would prefer a pro-life husband as long as he doesn't want to blow up abortion clinics or something.

Actually, due to my ultra-libertarian school in MA and my visit to the Germany, Netherlands and (soon) Australia my pet peeves are drug legalizations and prostitution legalization- but again as long as he isn't extreme. I would be somewhat okay if he wanted (and had a very good argument) to decriminalize medical marijuana but a red flag would go up if he wanted recreational- under no circumstance would I consider him if he thought the stuff was like chicken noodle soup or something though or if he used it. I would be extremely wary and probably not marry him if he wanted full legalization of prostitution especially if he, like a lot of pro-legalizing people at my school (mostly guys), ignore the human trafficking problem. Those are just somethings that I would have a hard time compromising on probably because they are morally based and directly affect me in someways- so, as my husband, I could take it personally.

Oh and he has to be carnivore- not crazy or anything- but he needs to crave a steak every once in a while.

Politics is not really my strong point but since my choices are morally/religiously based I would be wary of someone who had a complete 180 of my views but unless they were just downright selfish or creepy I would consider him. Overall, I'll probably lean more towards conservatives but eh' who knows (shrugs)

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I'm not sure. On the surface, it doesn't really bother me if someone I care about has different political beliefs than me. I respect that other people can be privy to the same information as me and reach a different conclusion about the role of government in peoples' lives.

The deeper problem is that it will almost certainly lead to arguments and hurt feelings. I should know. I was once in a relationship with someone whose political beliefs were completely antithetical to my own. Once, after I had just endured a particularly emotionally-taxing day, her rough attempt at a pick-me-up speech was something to the effect of [you deserve to be unhappy because of your political beliefs]. That was the only time in my life that I've ever initiated a break-up. I really have no interest in romantically pursuing someone that insists on treating me like a strawman political opponent and not as a person.

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Well my political views are nuke the whales, because, well, you have to nuke something. :P Just kidding.

Politics are not super important to me. Rational, honest, kind people make a bigger difference than your stance on Bill XYZ save the whatever.

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If you knew more about me, the idea that guns rights is open to negotiation would be highly amusing...

Most who know me know where I stand on this issue and the idea that it's open to discussion is highly amusing as well :)

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Yeah, I can't really compromise on my "political" beliefs, because they stem from moral beliefs.

 

I oppose abortion. I support same-sex marriage. If we can't see eye-to-eye on those things, no point.  Those to me are basic compassionate views, and they are very important to my life.

 

Also, the veganism thing gets more complicated.  I would only marry a vegan, because to me the moral issue is of even higher caliber that supporting same-sex marriage, and at the same caliber as abortion - preserve life, THEN worry about more complex rights.

HOWEVER... I wouldn't a girl to be vegan to DATE her.  It took my 19 years to be a vegan - it was always in me, but never acted upon until recently.  I think if a girl is as compassionate as I would need her to be, she'd at least be open to it, and it would make sense to her, but I would not rush her into it - the only way to stick with something for the rest of your life is to go into it gradually, taking steps.  Even if it took her a couple years.  Even just being vegetarian is not only morally good in my books, but also kind of hot.

 

And on a more minor note, I don't support legalization of marijuana. I'm also against the current legalization of booze, but that's less of an issue.

 

And on an even more minor note... I don't really like tattoos. I don't know if that's "political" or not, but I don't think we should be putting edits on what God made.

 

If a girl is "pro-choice", against same-sex marriage (or somehow thinks homosexuality is "wrong"), and never was going to be a vegan, I couldn't marry her.  I've taken a while to really solidify my political/moral values, and I can compromise on many things, but not morals.

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Well, the boyfriend is pretty libertarian, while I am more liberal (but I would say I have a pretty libertarian bent). However, we see eye-to-eye on most social issues, which are what are most important to me. My two biggest points are abortion and same-sex marriage. I need the person I'm with to be pro-choice from a legal standpoint, but also able to respect the fact that I can't ever see myself having one personally. And I'm bisexual, so I couldn't ever abide sharing my life with someone who would see fit to take away my rights if I had happened to end up with a woman instead of a man.

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I can't find myself being married to a big government Progressive. Just no.

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I guess I am out of luck when it comes to political compatibility. Mainly because I am a monarchist and there are not many of us left.

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Depends on what political beliefs. She must be pro gay marriage, must support aid to the poor issues, and she must support environmental issues. I can get around the other things.

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I follow politics pretty closely and so I don't think I'd be able to stand having a partner vote for the candidate opposite mine haha.

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That would be an awkward marriage. I don't think I could marry someone who didn't have similar views to mine.

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I follow politics pretty closely and so I don't think I'd be able to stand having a partner vote for the candidate opposite mine haha.

 

Agreed. 

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I don't think it would matter too much.  Most people would identify me as liberal but I have a few, though not many, conservative ideologies and a few libertarian viewpoints.  It might even be better to have someone with differing viewpoints as it could only either help you expand your mind or strengthen your beliefs.  

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I guess I am out of luck when it comes to political compatibility. Mainly because I am a monarchist and there are not many of us left.

 

 A monarchist in Knoxville, TN? I never thought I'd see the day. 

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I am strongly pro-life, and strongly pro-gun. Most of my politicial ideals are libertarian.

 

I can tolerate opposing viewpoints on most issues, but I couldn't live with somebody who wants to restrict my rights as a gun owner, or who believes in abortion.

 

Also, here in America, the two-party system is hopelessly corrupt. Both sides try to portray the other side as being extremist. There are a few differences in the political ideologies, but when you get right down to it, both sides are owned by the banking cartel. The differences between the parties are only there to create the illusion of choice to keep the voters in check.

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