Mike

9 Etiquette Guidelines for WTM.org

6 posts in this topic

Welcome to WTM.org! Here are some basic guidelines for getting along and thriving in this very special community. If you have an issue with any of these, or have some suggestions for other guidelines, please share!

1. Think of WTM.org like a group of friends
Some people arrive here looking for a date and hoping for The One, and that's cool, but take it slow. There are couples that met each other on this site and started dating, but they got to know each other first (via posts and PMs), recognized that they had things in common (besides WTM), and gradually built things up...just like in a real-life friend group.

We LOVE when people meet here and date, but we don’t love when new members flirt with everybody they see. That wouldn’t fly in a real-life friend group, and it doesn’t go over well here, especially with such broad age ranges (don’t be an accidental pedobear).

Ultimately we’re here to support each other and hang out with people who understand a piece of our lives that few can.

2. Remember that we’re all fighting the same battles here.
Remember: We’re on your side! Be grateful to have allies and don’t split hairs. If you think someone is wrong, articulate your point, but try to maintain your respect for the person as somebody who shares a very rare quality with you (waiting till marriage).

3. Stand up for what you think is right...thoughtfully.
This community operates on a high level of mutual respect (see point #2). Differing opinions make for great conversation, and we have plenty of that here. Thoughtful, well-articulated arguments are encouraged. But lecturing/preaching is not cool. Again, think of a real-life friend group: when you argue politics with a friend, you still intend to get drinks afterwards.

4. Set a profile picture
A profile picture makes you appear more friendly, makes you easier to remember (when you're new), and helps keep up the visual appeal of the site for guest lurkers. If you need help creating or setting a picture, ask somebody who already has a profile picture and they’ll be happy to walk you through it (or PM a Moderator). Note: You get bonus internet points for using a real picture.

5. What happens in Guys Only/Girls Only, stays in Guys Only/Girls Only.
Once you join and introduce yourself, you will be able to see and access the relevant "locker room" forum for your gender. These special areas are intended to be safe places, and you are honor-bound by the man code/woman code not to disclose anything discussed there. Going on Sunday chat and spilling the beans to a mixed group about the latest guys only/girls only topic is a quick way to lose the respect and trust of other members.

6. Be patient with new members
WTM.org is the warmest, safest place on the web for those who wait. I like to think of WTM.org as a winter cabin with a crackling fire, hot food, and great company for those who wait...and it’s surrounded on all sides by a harsh blizzard (everyday life). When people arrive here (usually from Google) it’s often like they’re coming in from the cold.

We understand that it may take time for new members to shake off all of the stormy things that brought them through our door, warm up, and relax.

It’s a tough place out there for us waiters. We know how lonely, frustrating, and embittering it can be on this path. We understand waiting-related hangups, gripes, and doubts better than anybody else. And to a large extent, we WANT you to vent all of that stuff out here, because it’s cathartic and helpful for everybody to address it.

So if a new member is a little rough around the edges, try to give them the benefit of the doubt first. Give them a chance to warm up.

7. Speak up if something is bothering you!
Sometimes personal hangups can make members toxic, and that makes the community less fun for everybody. If somebody is really killing your buzz and hindering your experience on WTM.org, let a Moderator know about it!

8. Suggest ideas!
If you have an idea of how we can make WTM.org better, please post it! This site thrives on good suggestions from members.

9. Keep it PG-13, except in VDA
Remember that we have age ranges here from 14-49. Technically, we don't filter profanity (otherwise I'm sure I would have gotten dinged a few times myself), but using it too often or in too vulgar a context is generally frowned upon due to the mixed age range.

10. Don't be hostile to non-waiters
It's perfectly OK to vent, but try to avoid better-than statements/rants. That kind of thinking will get us flamed quickly, and is unhealthy in general. It's totally cool to point out distinct advantages to waiting, or to lament over the comparatively loose standards of your friends. But don't start condemning.

11. Treat born-agains as equal citizens of WTM.org
I want this site to be an incredible resource for everybody who has decided to wait. Whatever past led them to their decision (to wait until marriage), we should be here to support them as fellow waiters, because right now that's exactly what they are.

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I really like these guidlines. I think they'll be easy to follow, but will provide for the best experience you can get among the other Waiters. This is very cool, great job Mike :)

If I have any suggestions i'll let you know :D This looks pretty good though.

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Hi, i am a girl, new to this Web-site. Right, I joined like-minded people, because I am waiting till marriage. My home-name is Nicole. Please advise if there is any upcoming social events, where I can meet you all in reality. Thanks.

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Hello, I am new to the site. I actually stumbled on the site because I wanted to start a similar forum myself. It is great to see that you have given those with like mindsets and values a place to go and communicate on a real essential topic that is degraded in todays society...This is beautiful and thank you!!!

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Hi new friends. I am a new member. I am a girl and I am really excited to find such a group of people with like minds. I made a true love waits committment when I was 9 years and I am grateful to God Almighty who has helped me stay true to.this commitment thus far, despite the hardships and everything around me making me seem stupid and naive to still be waiting. I am happy that I have not given up and I have finally joined a group of people who understand what it is like to wait and I hope we share and encourage one another as we become good friends. Thanks Mike for taking time to put down such clear and good principles to guide such a group like this to creating true friendship on firm and stable foundation.

I like the guidelines stated above because they are a form of my basic principles I have had in my life.

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Hi new friends. I am a new member. I am a girl and I am really excited to find such a group of people with like minds. I made a true love waits committment when I was 9 years and I am grateful to God Almighty who has helped me stay true to.this commitment thus far, despite the hardships and everything around me making me seem stupid and naive to still be waiting. I am happy that I have not given up and I have finally joined a group of people who understand what it is like to wait and I hope we share and encourage one another as we become good friends. Thanks Mike for taking time to put down such clear and good principles to guide such a group like this to creating true friendship on firm and stable foundation.

I like the guidelines stated above because they are a form of my basic principles I have had in my life.

Welcome! God bless you. 

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