ohmercyme

Making More Than Words?

9 posts in this topic

(First off, I know this topic has been posted before and even recently, but I feel so strongly about it I thought I'd give it new life.)

Some of you may have read my crabby depressing post I wrote recently about deciding not to WTM any longer. I'll say this though, you folks on this site are a breath of fresh air. You're all people who believe in a common ideal. You encourage each other, inspire each other, comfort each other when you're down. If I even had a small percentage of you people in my life all those years back, I may be a different person today.

But I think this site lacks one thing: Interaction! You folks should be finding each other on here! I mean look at the statistics. Sure, just because two people are WTM doesn't make them right for each other. But with the large pool of waiters on this site, I can only make an educated guess that just about everyone on here would have a match with someone else on here that could at least lead to a long lasting friendship if not a budding love. It's like we are all on here just staring at our true love's on a computer screen, we just can't see them because there's all these words in the way!

I'm not suggesting this should be a dating site, I think it would cheapen this great community that has been established. And I know that we all live all over the place but is it really such an obstacle? I don't know about you guys but if I suddenly talked to somebody say in Alaska that I thought might be my true love, I'd be shoppin' for snow shoes!

I'm not exactly sure what to do to get us together. Maybe we should have a big waitingtillmarriage.org meetup. It would be like a Star Trek convention just way weirder. Heck, with the advertisement alone just imagine how many other waiters would come out of the woodwork. You could do one in Kansas to be centrally located or split it up and do a New York/LA thing. And for those of you outside the U.S., you guys should also meet up at a good neutral location like Switzerland or the moon.

Something should happen. I'd love to hear if any of you have any thoughts or ideas about this. You're all fighting so hard to WTM, why not do it standing next to each other?

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Well there IS one couple here who met on this website. :)

But the fact is this: not only are there vast age differences (16-49 or something like that) but there are people here from Canada, America, Australia...probably more countries. And I'm 19, so it's not like I have the money to meet up with anyone. :P Also most of the guys on this site are much older than me (the really young members are mostly female.) But you're not talking about dating, are you?

But maybe one day...that would definitely be cool.

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ohmercyme, this is a forum of like-minded people first and foremost. The primary purpose is to support and encourage fellow waiters to maintain their commitment. Nothing more. If relationships develop over the course of our interactions, then great, but it needs to come naturally and gradually. Coming in here for the sole purpose of finding the one undermines the idea that this is a safe refuge for like-minded people and quite frankly, comes off as desperate. You can't rush these things, especially since we live so far apart from each other. What is the point of investing time and money going off to a distant land to meet someone who just happens to be a fellow waiter, only to find out they are not right for you? This is supposed to be a place for people to voice their struggles and concerns without feeling the pressure of being pursued left and right.

This is a great bunch of people and many of whom I would consider friends. They have been an inspiration to me and I hope I am one to them. Yes, we even have members who met on this site and are now dating, but it happened through natural progression. That's how I think the best relationships start is by being friends first. Just relax and discuss things. Get to know people and if you happen to find a connection with someone, great. If not, that's okay too. Heck, I would love it if I ended up finding my future wife here, but that's not the purpose of this site.

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I dunno, I think there's plenty of interaction on here...

I can barely keep up with the threads these days, plus there's the chat room that some members seem to live in these days! Haha

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I agree with Envincebal-it's all about supporting each other encouraging one another in our common goal first, and if friendships develop that's great but there is no need to rush things--and solid friendships are the key to good dating relationships--but this is a site for just encouraging one another and being a support to others.

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I dunno, I think there's plenty of interaction on here...

I can barely keep up with the threads these days, plus there's the chat room that some members seem to live in these days! Haha

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I agree with what everyone has said, esp Vince. I really do think making this into a dating site or anything of the sort cheapens it a little. Being able to come on here and join in discussions and make friends and get support is what this site's all about. And then at some point you may realize that you and someone else just kinda click...it happens :) But I think it works so much better when it's a natural progression of getting to know one another rather than on a dating site where dating is goal number one. It can work don't get me wrong but it isn't as natural...in my opinion.

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I agree with everyone that this is a forum of support and should stay just that. But, ohmercyme, if you feel so strongly about it maybe you should create some sort of event that is separate from this site. It actually sounds like a great idea. I'm sure that there are other waiters out there who do not belong to this site that are feeling the same way. I mean you yourself said:

Heck, with the advertisement alone just imagine how many other waiters would come out of the woodwork.

And then if others from here wanted to come they still could.

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I hear what OMM is saying. The particular and peculiar value that we all identify with is rare and difficult to find in the world. Ergo, why not take the one resource which unites us and put it to further use.

There are online dating websites which I recommend for this purpose, and you can put it in your profile what your hopes/expectations are. The logistics of uniting all of us do become a bit of a problem.

Still, I've begun thinking a Facebook page might be a good idea as well.

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