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Found 44 results

  1. Hello! My name is Rachael and I found this site because I have no idea what to do when it comes to men, much less dating. I used to be really overweight, nerdy, and very quiet. In fact most of my family thought I was mute when I was little. As a result I was always a loner, friends never lasted long and boys looked me over. And I was a late bloomer when it came to guys, in fact I didn't even notice them until this year . But men are not interested usually in girls who are more like a guy than feminine. I got ignored a lot, I could talk to guys but they would always look at my sisters like I wasn't there. It destroyed the view I had of myself, I thought I was ugly, stupid, and not worth anyone's time. Fast-forward some years later, massive amount of weight lost, and the wallflower is no longer invisible! My goal is to be a Marine, and ultimately the first female Marine Sniper. I'm still a tomboy, nerdy, but not so much quiet. And guys are noticing me, which is why I'm on this awesome site! I am a Christian and I am determined to wait till marriage. My siblings didn't wait and I don't want to follow in their footsteps. But I'm finding out that even if a guy says he's a Christian, doesn't mean he has the same views of sex as me . Also telling a guy I'm waiting till marriage makes most of them more determined to get into my pants. I'm a unicorn apparently . I am hoping to get help on this site with dating and men in general. Especially since I'm going into the military and I'll be on my own without my bulldog of a mother, who's extremely protective of her last virgin daughter. That's my story! Any questions I'll answer! Don't hold back if your curious about something I am an open book.
  2. What up, I was just wondering if any other guys find it difficult to wait? I am 26 and currently in maintenance in the Air Force. When I was a teenager I had to few opportunities to take the path most traveled so to speak. However, I wasn't the smartest teenager and didn't see the signs. When I turned about 20 years old I figured I my "blindness" was more of a gift and I should continue waiting. It is by far the most difficult thing I have ever done. More difficult than basic training, more difficult than special ops orientation course, it by far takes the number one spot on the list of difficult challenges. I don't know if anyone else has ever served, but working in maintenance sex and past sexual partners is pretty much an open subject. After a year or so I began to feel as if I was the only guy in the world who had chosen to wait, but I keep pushing myself to resist the urge; I kept thinking "There must be women out there who wait too". My advice to anyone who has trouble waiting is occupy your time with other things, fill your mind with other adventures life has in store. I have done this myself. I am three classes away from completing my associates, certified SCUBA diver, sky diver, and have visited more than six countries. Basically there are plenty of other things to do. Also keep in mind the benefits of waiting, survey results report better a sex life. better communication, better marriage stability among couples who wait.
  3. So my best friend in this entire galaxy is this boy. He's my same age, 17 (or will be in like a week), we have the same interests, same thoughts, we have talked all day every day for about the past 6 months. And of course we hang out tons and do exciting things, and teach each other new things. I have never met anyone like him, I'm definitely in love with him. I'm his best friend too, I'm one of the very few people he is close with. But, yeah, he has a girlfriend. It hasn't been long, just a couple months, and before that we were a thing. And when I found out that he had eyes for this other girl, of course I made him choose. And he wanted to be with her in that way. Two weeks later, he confesses that he regrets his decision entirely and that he's way more compatible with me than his girlfriend. They disagree on some important religious things, and their hangouts/dates are usually very routine and he didn't like it. But she is very attached to him. It's been a months since then and he's still with her. He says he couldn't bring himself to break up with her, that he didn't give it enough of a chance. He says that she feels like the right choice right now. But he says that he sees a future with me. And he's reiterated that so many time that he truly sees something for us in the future. He knows how unfair he is being and he knows how much of a jerk he seems and he apologizes and says he deserves no pity and that he just feels so awful. I told him a week ago that I have to leave. He means so much to me, he's my best friend, that is SO much to leave. But I tried very hard to make it work, to put my feelings aside and wait a while. But I'm drowning over here, it's devastating. So I told him I have to leave. Let him go completely, so I can move on. That's the only way I'm going to. He begged, pleaded for me to stay. He said he "could not f***ing live without me" and that he'd "fall apart". He said I mean so much to him and he knows this is selfish but he needs me...I do not feel obligated to stay because of this, but what I do feel is that I need him too. He said he knows 2 things: 1) He's not in love with her. But he "likes her a lot" 2) It would be so hard if not impossible to be happy without me in his life. He said that it's ultimately not her. But he never said that means it's ultimately me. He won't tell me why it's not ultimately her, he says it's too hard to say right now and it makes him feel terrible and that he'll tell me soon enough but he didn't want to talk about it right then. He said that he wants me to hold on to the hope that we'll be together at some point and to wait for the time when him and his girlfriend are no more. He didn't mention when that would happen, if it was soon or months from now. But what I do know is that I'm hanging on by not even a thread - but a single fiber of that thread. He realizes and I realize that he sounds so terrible, which is hard to accept because he cares so much about others and he is a very guilt-stricken individual who HATES hurting people. And that guilt makes him do stupid things. Being patient is hard. And I don't know if it is right. I change my mind a lot. Does anyone have advice on what I should do? I'm sorry I know that was a long story. Any personal experiences that relate? I want to be with him so much, but not as a friend forever. I just can't.
  4. Hello everyone!

    Hello, WTM community! So my name's 'Aurora', and I'm a 19 year old virgin. I decided to join this website because I found that I need somebody to talk to about this, aside from my boyfriend. It feels nice knowing that there's a community of people out there who, like me, believe that sex is a part of the true commitment of marriage, and not just something that should be thrown around and offered to everybody. Up until about 8 months ago, when I met my boyfriend, let's call him 'Phillip', I would have thought everybody on here was a little crazy. I would have gone against this website solely for the sake of doing so. It wasn't that I was against waiting until marriage, just that I had never really thought about it. In my community, everybody is so open about talking about sex, and not really worried about virginity. In fact, my parents have offered to help me get birth control when I needed it. For some reason, I think it was part of God's plan for me, I have always been single. Aside from Phillip, I have only ever called one other guy my boyfriend, and we never did anything more than a quick peck on the lips, mainly because we were early high school students. If I had had a boyfriend before meeting Phillip, and he had wanted to have sex, I probably would have, mainly because my beliefs kind of fluctuated. Sometimes I wondered, is sex really that good that some people can't wait for it? Isn't it just for the creation of children? Why is it so important? The first person that I new that was waiting until marriage was an old boss of mine. She was 25 at the time. I never actually found out why she was waiting, just that she was. Then there was another co-worker at that job who didn't believe in premarital sex or birth control. She got married while I worked there, and soon after was pregnant. Near the end of my first year of University, I met Philip there. I instantly liked him a lot, and we started dating. After a few dates, he sat me down for a serious talk. He gave me a 'heads-up' that he was waiting until marriage (because it was part of his religion, and the beliefs of his community), and that, due to this, he wasn't moving in with anyone before marriage. I told him that that sounded fine to me, and that I understood where he was coming from. I've never been a religious person. I'd always just been like many other people-believing in God, but not partaking in prayer or church groups. After meeting Phillip though, my perspective on life changed. Now I regularly attend church with a co-worker of mine, and can't imagine any other way of living. I don't think that, even if I wasn't with Phillip, I could ever partake in premarital sex now. It just doesn't seem right. Now, I view sex as the ultimate connection between man and wife. It's something that, after meeting Phillip, I know that I desire, but something that I know we will wait for. It's just too important for us not to wait. I've rambled on enough for now. I'm just happy that I found you guys! So once again, hello everyone! Aurora
  5. Hey Waiters! I wasn't really sure which section to put this under, so I just kind of put it in 'Discuss Stuff'. Do we have another name aside from 'Waiters'? I feel like we should, because to me, 'Waiters' always reminds me of the restaurant workers under the same title. If we don't have another name, is anybody else looking for a different name? Or is it just me who thinks we could have another one? I don't know-let me know what you guys think...
  6. Hi everyone! So one of my friends brought up the argument of "Why wait on having sex when you are young, healthy, and have powerful desires now-the future is uncertain." As in, we all don't know when we are going to die, so we should do what we'd like to do now and enjoy as much as we can in life before time runs out- whether that's 5 or 80 years from now. To a certain degree I agree with this, however in my opinion, sex is something special I only want to reserve for one person. If that time doesn't come, then that's life, I won't regret my decision. So how do you all feel about this? Do you have any comments on this logic being applied to other things like drinking, smoking, doing extreme sports (skydiving), etc.? Like, why care so much for the future, when the present is already here? I'm eager to read your responses! (Feel free to merge if this topic has been covered already).
  7. I don't believe that anyone should ever feel this way. I hope that my future husband and I can have good communication about sex and explore each other's fantasies/desires. What are your thoughts ?!?
  8. Hi All, I just joined the site because I've recently found it nearly impossible to wait for marriage any longer. My boyfriend and I have been together for 4 years and have yet to have sex (we're both virgins also). We decided together when we first started going out (his initial idea, actually) that we should wait until we were married. It's always been a struggle for him, but one he's willing to make, but for me it hasn't been too difficult; until the last 6 months or so. Just before I turned 20 I started to find it harder and harder to wait, and the other night while having a make-out session I felt like I just couldn't wait any longer. I feel ready, emotionally and physically, but spiritually I know I really should wait. I don't have a purity ring and never took a pledge, for this very reason, but I really want to wait as long as I can (preferably until we're married). The thing is we won't be married for another year and a half at the very earliest (he hasn't yet proposed, but we've discussed it). Any advice on how to curb the desire? I'm so conflicted and just need to support on suggestions on how to wait as long as possible. Thanks so much!
  9. Hello I'm Amber :)

    Hello, I'm new here(first day) and I signed up once I saw this forum from Google. I'm 22 years old and a student at University of Wisconsin. I'm really attracted to health careers so, I recently switched majors from Business to Biomedical Science. Majoring in Biomedical Science will help me become a dietitian, nutritionist, or even a doctor. I love traveling, watching movies, listening to music, and shopping. I'm also very interested in other cultures and languages. I really like going to new places. I plan to travel to France and South Korea someday, so I'm learning both languages. I decided that I would remain a virgin until marriage when I was 15. I thought the usual thoughts about sex with having sex with your boyfriend and just remembering to use protection. That was until Rebecca St. James was talking about waiting on the Gospel Music Channel. This was actually a year before I started dating, so she persuaded me right on time. I read my Bible, said a prayer and began writing letters to my husband shortly after. I'm really glad I found this site and I really hope that someday everyone will see the importance of waiting till marriage.
  10. I was checking postsecret today and found a few related to waiting! This first one is kinda funny, but nice to hear about someone who has only ever slept with their spouse. The other two have inapropriate pictures, but I will quote them because they're also related to waiting. "I didn't take your virginity because I felt it (the relationship) was going to end and I love you so much, I want it to be special for you." "After 15 years, I am still inexhaustibly aroused by the woman I married. You are gorgeous baby!"
  11. I don't know if there is a better place to put this post... it's definitely an introduction of sorts, but I have already posted in the Introductions forum! Woops, guess I'll just slide this one in here as well :3 This is my story, my testimony if you will.... I imagine the more religious people here will enjoy it immensely, and I hope the less religious can as well. I'm going to trace my life back to the 10th grade and recap on the mistakes I've made, mistakes that have cost me a great deal already, only 3 years later. Mistakes that wake up with me and lie down with me, that haunt me in the hallway like ghosts and follow me down the streets like gangs. This is going to be a lengthy post. By October of 2009, I was 15 years old and had not kissed a girl yet. This was strange, as I was a football player and a wrestler... the jock with the Spartan jaw... a public figure at my church, a generally well-liked and popular guy who intimidated bullies by my presence and was known for standing up for less popular people. It was in church, while I was playing a djembe for the youth group's praise band that a girl walked by me and caught my eye. I later figured out her name, the fact that she was a foreign exchange student from Switzerland and got in touch with her, and by the 29th of October, we were kissing on our very first date (it happened to be the Michael Jackson movie, THIS IS IT). Such a beautiful and innocent picturesque moment of teenage romance. What I didn't realize is that she was only Christian by name of her family, she actually had no real religion and didn't believe the teachings of the Bible, and had never heard of the practice of WTM. I found that it was my goal to represent Christ in her life by treating her with the utmost respect and dignity, and being the real Christian man any girl would want. Well, it only took about a month folks. I had my first sexual encounter pretty early on, and we just kept progressing. It was about this time that I had a very real dream of a city on a river, and she was in another guy's arms on the bank of this river. He got up and let her there, and she was weeping. I woke up weeping myself. In response, I kept setting us different sexual boundaries that we wouldn't cross, and every one we eventually crept up to and crossed with discretion. We were suffering pressure from her host parents to spend all of our time in private so that we could do as we pleased, and also the pains of first-found love. But I wouldn't do it all the way... sex in its fullest form, that was off-limits to me... and eventually she had enough of it. She moved back to Switzerland and after 3 weeks, cut me off in favor of finding a guy there. You can imagine how crushed I was. Now 16 years old, my first love of 7 months tells me that I'm not man enough to satisfy her, so she's going to go give herself away to another in search of satisfaction. We were supposed to be it FOREVER dammit, and nobody should take that away from us, not even her... I really didn't think she knew what was good for her, and she didn't, but I was in no different boat. My mom had left for Philadelphia for the summer, and I sat home alone for close to 50 days before I made a move. We had planned a trip for me to Switzerland, and in July she still wanted me to come over, promising that we could give things another shot while we were there. I got to Basel and spent all my nights in her room, not "doing the deed" but creeping back up on my boundaries again. We fell deeper in love than before, but it was again jeopardized when she gave me an ultimatum: sex or bust. So on the 9-month anniversary of our first date I told her fine, let's do this thing. It was the second biggest mistake of my life. For 7 days and nights, we did as we pleased. I gave my soul away piece by piece, and reasoned with myself on every aspect of my life. In that short time I lost the religion I had grown up with and my morals took a downward turn, my relationships with people started to change and I became a new person. But you know, the thing about a trip is it has to come to an end. I returned to America with promises that we would stay together but 5 weeks later (exactly one year after our first date), I heard through the grapevine that she was with another guy. And then 3 months later my dream came true, and he left her stranded on the banks of the Rhine with a broken heart. Wow. Just when I thought I had conquered this love thing, it kicked me in the 'nads. I lived in 4 more months of bleak pain, unsure about my future love life, considering enlisting in the military as an infantrymen and just spending my days wandering the wastelands of the middle east with nothing but me and a rifle. I was a junior in high school interviewing for a spot at Georgia's Governor's Honors scholastic program when Izzy walked through the door. She was a beautiful, busty blonde with a thick southern accent and the kind of eyes that make you stop what you're doing and just stare back at them. Once again, I got her contact info and got in touch with her. 2 months later, I was starting the cycle again. We first dated in February, and by May I figured out that I didn't love her like I had loved Miss Switzerland and was still very attracted to other girls. I never had full intercourse with her, but this time it was me who did the heartbreaking. I'm glad I broke it off when I did, because she went on to have good relationships and respect her privacy with no real regrets. I stayed single (and Agnostic) until the following August, when I had my only one night stand. A french exchange student (sense a pattern here?) who was 2 years older than me had one of the most rockin' bodies I had ever seen, and we lay on my sister's couch at her University. I knew immediately that it was wrong, but tried to work through it. God had me in his hand though, and didn't let me "perform" like I had been able to so many times before. I had an ok time but ended up wishing it hadn't happened, especially when I found the girl of my dreams a month later. A friend had been begging me to come back to church, so I went one Wednesday night. It was in the same room I met Miss Switzerland that 17-year old me met a 15-year old Fox model. I was madly in love at sight, and so was she, and were were dating by the end of the week. 3 weeks later, my hormones kicked in and I started making moves down south. She told me to wait a little bit, but eventually started taking some initiative herself and exploring her first lover's body. We were the picture-perfect couple for 7 months (shocker!) until I got a scholarship to a school in Pennsylvania. Very respectfully and lovingly, I let her down easy, telling her that we still had a chance in the future, but with a plane ride's distance in between us, it just wasn't likely. It was the third biggest mistake of my life. The next night, I had a dream that she got in a terrible car crash and her status wasn't known. I hope this one doesn't come true like the last one. I moved to Philadelphia but my scholarship opportunity fell through, and by July of this past year I moved back south to Florida, where she had just moved. You can see where I'm going with this. I re-adopted my faith in this time of transition but made none of the commitments that came with serious Christianity. God gave me another chance with the sweetest love of my life so far. Who wants to guess what I did? I'll give you a hint: it was the biggest mistake of my life. You probably guessed intercourse. Well, you wouldn't be completely wrong. We did everything just short of it, and now that I had my own apartment it became a LOT easier. We would do a Bible study and "lovey time" in the same visit, and God didn't like that at all. Instead of begging for forgiveness of my idiocy and sin, I thanked God for the opportunity to "get my rocks off". Things were literally going better than ever, until one day (almost a year to the day from our first date) I got a text message that crushed me. She wanted to be single for 2 years, and being friends wasn't an option for us. I would see her once more at church before I switched churches, and haven't seen her since. It's been a little over 2 months. Since then, I recommitted my faith to a deeper level than ever. I've accepted God's plan and high standards for my life, and recommitted myself to WTM for the first time since 2010. No more drinking underage, no more sex until marriage, try to stay away from porn and bad habits, and dedicate myself completely to study and worship of God. I kept reading 2 Bible chapters per day, and still do. I've finished the New Testament and Genesis and Exodus. I'm in the process of re-establishing myself with a praise band, and getting over my last heartbreak. She is still the most beautiful girl I've ever met, but I saw a picture of her online the other day. Her arms were around another guy in her living room. I shut my computer off and took a long drive when I saw it. It's kind of like that song "Boys of Summer" by Don Henley, listen to the lyrics... I can't listen to any sappy music yet. It grinds my gears in a time when I'm trying to focus on the positive. As mean as she was to me during the breakup (she really did behave pretty disastrously), I would still hear her out if she came back to me. But I have a funny feeling I blew that opportunity. I live with my regrets daily. They cloud my thoughts and peruse my mind. They devour my time and leech on my grades. I pray every day that people like you can learn from my mistakes, and that one day I will find a wife who will understand my flaws and help restore me to fullness. I plan to devote my career and life to rocking her world in return, giving thanks to God all the way along. I look forward to helping you guys through your struggles as I hope you can help me through mine.
  12. What does having sex mean to you? Or a much better question, why is it so special to you? I know that we get a whole lot of BS influence of sex from the media - that it's all about pleasure and the act of doing it, but what is it (for you) REALLY about?
  13. I thought you all, more than anyone else, would find this true love story particularly adorable, romantic, and dreamy. TL;DW This does contain a lot of things about God's hand; but also how the couple listened to their heart and actually found each other--californian and an alaskan! And how bad choices or a rough few younger years can be overcome. And purity can be restored
  14. Is God Waiting On Me?

    I'm someone who grew up in the church. Before moving an hour away from my hometown, I was the girl who went to church every Sunday and Wednesday, was in the choir, and was just very involved. Even though I did all of these things, I have still always felt like I wasn't doing enough or my relationship with God was not where it needed to be. I don't read and study my bible like I know I should. I also know I don't pray and talk to God as much as I need to. I think about this every day. I tell myself tomorrow is going to be different. I'm going to do what I need to do. And the next day, still, nothing changes. I sometimes feel like God knows where he wants me to be and he knows that I am not ready personally, spiritually, emotionally, etc. for a relationship or marriage? Has anyone ever felt like this before? Since I already know what's wrong with me, is God waiting on me to change, handle my responsibilities, and mold myself so that I will be a better person for the man He is going to send my way? I guess I'm just looking for your opinions on the matter...
  15. HEY THERE, such a relief to find this site. I thought I was the last person on earth waiting till marriage. I would love to have good Christian fellowship with the wome.n on here, and maybe even meet who God has for me. I am 23, Male, living in NC. I am a Police officer in the army. I am also a volunteer fire fighter. I am willing to move where God leads. I am looking a Christian female 18-30, never married, virgin,located pretty much anywhere. I am in shape and prefer that the be of athletic build.
  16. Acceptance ^_^

    Hi, my name is Nita. My boyfriend, Will, and I are waiting until marriage to have sex! I am 25 years old and he is 21 years old. My virginity was taken from me on my 21st birthday, otherwise, I would still be virgin. Nonetheless, Will excepts me for who I am, and I accept him. We love each other and that is why I am so grateful to have such a wonderful guy to call my mate. I am so proud of him for sticking to his guns, even though it is tempting, we keep each other in check, lol. I stumbled upon this site, and thought, 'WOW, this is a very supportive group of great people'.
  17. Love Birds: Beyond Death

    Good morning family and top of the day to you. My name is Lysious and I am new to this family of waiters. I've always been one of those who believe in waiting till marriage for sex. And I thank God for the grace to keep this vow, He prevented me from compromising this no-sex-till marriage vow. As I grew older as a Christian, I came to the commitment of not just keeping sex out of the equation but also any sex-related habits as well. I am a novelist, poet and host of Underground Gospel, a music show on WHBC-Howard University's student run radio station. Last year, I released a fiction novel titled Love Birds: Beyond Death It is a book about two teenagers who fell in love at a young age but made a vow of chastity. I think every teenager in America needs to read this book because I deal with some of the challenges we face as young people. More about the book and an interview I recorded can be found here: The Interview: I look forward to having a great time with everyone on this group. I will also like to hear everyone. Thanks Lysious