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About Slayerofdragon

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    The One Who Slays Dragons
  • Birthday July 31

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    Basketball, guitar, chess, reading, oldies
  1. I am a graduate student at the moment and while I am not married yet, I also feel pursuing a relationship while in graduate school depends on the person. I also feel similar to you Bob about not wanting to pursue a relationship while in graduate school. The main reason why I feel this way is because I do not have time to really devote my energy to that relationship. However, I do feel that having relationships are important. For example, I think it is important to have a support group including circle of friends. I think what helped me wait while in graduate school is finding a group of friends who share similar values. As Gema, articulated well graduate school is a sacrifice but I also think it is well worth it if you enter your program for the right reasons. You change and grow as a person when you enter this period in your life and feel it will be a benefit to your future relationship with your wife.
  2. I also get where you are coming from. I do not think waiting till marriage is considered normal by society standards. I know I have felt similar as I become older and I still choose to wait till marriage because for me I feel sort of alone in my decision to wait and at my age it feels like people are getting married or already married. Like Vince, I have not been in romantic relationship with a woman yet and I sometimes feel the pressure of hooking up with a woman. However, I know that would go against my principles on sex and relationships. Hang in there Will. There are people like myself who understand a little bit of what you are going through and support you.
  3. Hi, recently joined

    Welcome to the site, :).
  4. I don't think you are screwed. Some women just don't feel comfortable giving a hug after first meeting someone. It takes time to get to know someone, be comfortable with her, before a hug happens. If you do meet this woman again, maybe talk with her and get to know her first before you decide to pursue things further. Being friends first is not always a bad thing. Just my two cents.

    Short story: I thought about waiting till marriage in late college years. Found this site about six years ago and since then haven't wavered from my decision. This site has helped solidify my choice to wait till marriage plus I found some good close friends on here who are waiters too. I feel blessed, :).
  6. Vince: I agree with your points especially the last paragraph. I think awkwardness with your spouse is a good thing since it brkngs both of you closer together. The video made some good points too.
  7. Hmm... I am not sure since every woman is different. In other words, there is no magical formula to attract a woman. Some like small talk and others not so much. I think it is important to just be you . If you don't like small talk that's fine. Myself, I don't like small talk so much. Why? It is because I want to get to the heart the conversation. Some woman may not find that attractive and it is up to you to be comfortable with that reaction and sometimes that takes time or some self-help.
  8. Nick Vujicic Inspirational marriage

    Thanks :).
  9. I am open to LDR too for some of the reasons that Vince posted. As a waiter, I find it challenging to find a woman who is waiting and possesses similar beliefs as myself in my local area thus I am open to the possibility of a LDR. Granted, there will be challenges for both persons but I feel that there will be challenges even for a couple who are not LD. I think what matters is how the couple work on the issues present in their own situation.
  10. I wouldn't mind marrying someone from a different ethnicity. Maybe that's because I come from a mixed family (Philippino, Japanese, German ethnicity here).
  11. I have a lot of family members from the Philipinnes and I can say the women make good spouses. My mom is a good example of it.
  12. First Kiss

    Hm...maybe a couple of months. It would take me a while to ask a girl out on a date (even when we have been friends for a while) so I expect my first first kiss to take a while too.
  13. I think I would feel the same with Vince on this one too. I would also make my intentions and feelings known to the other person and do my best to meet her in person. On the one hand, the seed is planted for both our feelings and on the other hand, I think I would act on wanting to be exclusive depending upon how she would feel at the moment we meet or even before we met. For example, if both of us notice the feelings are still there after we meet then I would continue to pursue and even take her on a date. If she had feelings for me and vice versa but realized, for example, that there is an ocean between us and she does not want to keep both of our hopes up too much or whatever, then I would take it slowly. I think my actions on exclusivity would depend on the woman. If she is a woman who wants to take things slowly then I think I would react to it accordingly. Although, I would make my feelings and intentions clear.
  14. I agree with Vince here. All things being equal, I think I would choose the online person. For several reasons here: 1) Like Vince said, you are already emotionally invested and I want to keep the connection I have with this person. 2) LDR/LDF (long distance friendships) can teach you many things about yourself and even the other person. For example, you can learn to be patience and understanding. You also learn to cherish the moments you have together too. In addition, being separated from each other, in some way can put the pressure off both of you. There is not necessarily a pressure to perform unlike in relationships where you actually meet the person. 3) Long distance relationships are difficult but I think if both of you survive and are willing to make it work it can be worth it. I would also want the online person to tell me she met someone in real life. Although, I also would be disappointed. I would want to know though. I would be happy for her and do my best to move on.
  15. I think long distance relationships are worth it. I think the quality of the relationship will depend on the maturity of the people involved. For example, responding to a person via email may take time and some people may not be patient on waiting. I think that's a characteristic of doing this type of relationship. Then, you also have the thought of distance. If she lives in another country that could be another obstacle to meeting each other but I think it is possible,