LookingForTheOne

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Everything posted by LookingForTheOne

  1. Favorite flower?

    Since this is Valentine's Day, what's your favorite flower? I'm going with a white rose.
  2. Men, would you date/marry a taller woman?

    Same question for women. So, would you date or marry a taller woman?
  3. Don't let yourself be caught off guard because your boyfriend (or girlfriend, as the case may be) wants to fornicate...especially if you're still a virgin. I know you'll lose many relationships because of your decision to wait. I certainly know I will. But in the end, those relationships aren't right for you, and those would-be spouses don't deserve to be your 'first' or your spouse. In the end, I'm sure that the person you do end up marrying will not only accept your choice, but will appreciate it as well. And when you get there, you'll be glad you waited until marriage. I primarily directed this at women, as it's usually men who want to 'test drive', but increasingly this applies to men as well (yes, there are women who are into 'test driving'). I know some visitors are struggling with their decision to wait because their significant other doesn't want that. All I'm saying is, don't let that get in the way of your decision.
  4. First, a warm "thank you" to the successful waiters on this forum, Ian, Jennifer and (I think) AussieStig. (AussieStig has not been around lately, but I think he is married now.) I look up to all of you and have found your stories and advice to be very good and inspirational. Now, I got this idea when thinking of Jegsy Scarr's "Ask a Catholic" thread, in Religious Topics. I felt that it might be helpful to have a similar thread for those who have successfully waited until marriage (if, of course, said successful waiters are OK with it; if not, that's fine, too).
  5. Would you do a prenuptial agreement?

    I used to think this way. Now I disagree. This may have been the case in the past, but now, if anything, a prenup helps discourage divorce--by saying "if you divorce me, you don't get to take anything that was mine before marriage." In other words, it eliminates the financial incentive that many people have in mind when divorcing. If your spouse does end up pulling a fast one on you and reneges on their wedding vows, you have to protect yourself. I, too, don't like the idea of a prenup as part of a "Hollywood marriage"--for example, "with this prenup, I will be able to divorce them more easily". But what do you do if they file for divorce? Prenuptial agreements aren't cheapening marriage--they are a reaction against divorce, which is what's actually cheapening marriage. Of course, since even that often doesn't work (courts refuse to uphold them, which means you can lose everything anyway), it's best to not get a marriage license.
  6. While I understand your annoyance, this is a common problem and I even think his reaction is justified. The problem is that men and women can't be "just friends" if attraction is involved. It makes interaction between you more awkward, and he would be pulling at his heartstrings for something that won't materialize. I think he realizes that being just friends won't get him any closer to what he wants. You did do the right thing by being honest, and I would like to think that your friendship could continue, but in most cases it doesn't work that way.
  7. Absolutely not, unfortunately.
  8. How long would you wait for marriage?

    I'd want to get married as soon as possible! The relationship pre-marriage shouldn't last more than 2 years.
  9. What are your goals in life?

    To get a good wife and have a family together! It's far more important to me than money, a career or what have you.
  10. Just a hypothetical...it does not apply to me right now. Say you want to explain your celibacy to your significant other, who does not want to wait until marriage. Or you've discovered that your partner isn't waiting or isn't a virgin, and you want to end the relationship. Or you've simply decided to break the ice because you haven't talked about it but feel that the time has come to do so. How do you go about that? What do you say and how do you broach the topic?
  11. ?Consummate the Marriage?

    That's exactly what it is. After your wedding, you come back home with your new spouse, and one of you says, "Now what?" (really more like "what are we waiting for?") And everything goes from there.
  12. Now, of course, all of us are "looking for the one". And I've noticed that it's not that uncommon...even among people who are not waiting until marriage. I have heard something along the lines of "he's/she's the one!" even from people who aren't waiting. But they don't mean it in the same way we waiters do. Thoughts?
  13. Marrying Someone Who Was Married Before

    Well, I don't know what the other men think, but I wouldn't go for either and I don't see a difference.
  14. Marrying Someone Who Was Married Before

    No, I've stated before that I want to marry a virgin. I wouldn't waive that requirement even for a widow, much less a divorcee. And I wouldn't be comfortable with being someone's second husband as I myself have never been married yet.
  15. "The one" versus "my one and only"?

    Correct. Despite my user name, I think the idea of "soul mates" is flawed, and it's not what I think of when I talk about "the one".
  16. Post Pro-WTM Pictures

    This one is by far the best. I know it's old, but I'd change the third line to: "Lucky guys get to be her only."
  17. Am I A Bad Person?

    I think it's normal to think the way you do. You do want the physical...yet, you also want to wait. I'm sure it's easy to be "torn" between these ideas. Personally, I don't think that what you're doing is good (and I don't mean to condemn you--but I don't think it's a good idea from the perspective of waiting till marriage). If you do go past mere kissing, it becomes so much harder to resist going all the way. and the creation of the "gray area" is exactly why so many people who intended on waiting eventually "slip up". It's much easier, from a WTM perspective, to firmly point out "no, I'll only kiss you or hold hands, but nothing private" or something like that. (Although I personally like the idea of only sharing your body with your spouse, which is why I don't like the idea of going beyond a kiss or hand-holding before marriage.)
  18. I´m [name removed], non-virgin

    It's good that you understand what you're going for--and yes, it's hard to wait when you're not a virgin anymore. However, it's not a deal-breaker for everyone; there are even men in the same situation as you.
  19. Say you're into someone and decide to ask them out. They say no for whatever reason. Well, you've moved on, and at some point down the road, it turns out that they have changed their mind, and all of a sudden they want you! How do you react?
  20. Rejection question

    This was exactly what I was thinking of when I was saying "you didn't want me young; you won't get me old." Overall, you hit the nail on the head right there.
  21. Any programmers

    Does HTML count?
  22. Who here aspires to marry a wealthy man?

    You're greedy and shallow. And also a hypocrite. You want a high-paying job, the independence of being a working woman, etc., but you still expect a provider for a husband? That is the one of the worst features of modern feminism (sorry about going off-topic). And yes, you are a gold-digger.
  23. I see a lot of people who did not wait until marriage because they were sure that they marry their partner anyway, or thought their partner was "the one". Sometimes it works (by which I mean that the couple does indeed get married), but sometimes the partners break up, in which case the result is usually awful. What do you think of the idea of not waiting till marriage if you think the relationship will lead to marriage? I personally wouldn't do it...even if I were double sure we'd be married and it's the day before the wedding. It's not about the risk--the chance that the marriage might not actually happen. To me, there is something very sweet about the idea of a virgin bride. It's something I want very much. And even if marriage does indeed occur, to me, the "magic" (should I call it that?) is all gone if you don't wait until marriage. Even if you do marry your partner, you still "did the deed" (and were willing to do so) with someone to whom you were not married at the time.
  24. Shaving Off Hair

    I'd be horrified. I've said it elsewhere--I like long, straight hair. For a woman to cut her her that short (especially if she had good, long hair before that) would be upsetting.