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About Olivier

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    Jesus, writing, movies, weightlifting, NBA, NFL, Houston Rockets, THE DUGGARS, current events,

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  1. You're God of the hills and valleys.

  2. When I see that cross, I see freedom
    When I see that grave, I'll see Jesus
    And from death to life, I will sing Your praise

  3. Yes, you could liken it to that. Very valid point. You/a wife would have every reason to be hurt at that. Among other things, it's degrading. It reminds me of a saying. I'm paraphrasing but: For a husband, when everything is right inside the bedroom, everything will be right outside the bedroom. For a wife, when everything is right outside the bedroom, everything will be right inside the bedroom. It's over simplifying but you get the point. If Eva had a better attitude towards sex (intercourse and/or other things) and prioritized it more , I like to think Zac's communication would improve (notice that i focused on attitude and priority. It's one thing to be unable to have sex and it's another thing to not even care that you can't). Likewise, If Zac had better communication, I like to think Eva's attitude towards sex would improve. The problem is that it's a catch 22. One of them has to attempt to break the cycle, or they can try together. Yes, it's vulnerable, humbling, and scary. However, it's the only way to stop the seeds of bitterness from growing.
  4. Oh okay. Thanks for clarifying. That changes things. I'm tempted to say it is "durable" but a year is a long time. Also, there's a difference between not wanting to and physically being unable to. There's a lot of grey area in this scenario. For the record though, no intercourse for a year is still a big deal. IMHO, it is in fact "severe". Yes, life happens, but it's nothing to be non-chalant about. Just my opinion.
  5. When You speak dreams and reality collide,

    Your word rewrites my destiny,

    My life finds a new beginning,

    Cause You are, You are my energy.

  6. Wow. If and when you get engaged, please let your fiance known you feel this way? I promise I'm not being rude, it's just an honest request.
  7. To the One who has rescued my soul,

    To the One who has welcomed me home,

    To the One who is Savior of all,

    I sing forever.

  8. What offends you?

    Great suggestions above. Simple but effective. Like many others, I am giving a big "+ 1" to what Joseph said. Off the top of my head, here are some things: 1. Re-read what Joseph said. This goes for plutonic relationships as well as potential romantic interests. 2. If a guy holds the door open for you, say "thank you". Bonus points if you smile. Don't just breeze by and not say a thing. It doesn't mean he thinks you're "weak", or that he's trying to get into your pants. (No snark intended). 3. If a guy compliments you, don't dismiss it by putting yourself down. Say thank you. Bonus points if you smile. 4. Don't make generalizations about men, i.e. "all guys are a**holes". Or, if you choose to make generalizations, make sure you speak about women's shortcomings as well. Better to stay away from generalizations altogether IMHO. 5. Acknowledgement is a good thing. If you're at a place where you see the same faces all the time, i.e. school or work, "good morning" or "hi" goes a long way. 6. Smiling always adds bonus points. I understand that these things seem simple and like common sense, but you'd be surprised. Very surprised.
  9. Friendly FYI: I know of this guy and read his book a while ago. His description of Hell contradicts the Bible.
  10. Lists are amazing. Just bookmarked! Thnx for sharing.
  11. Appreciate it, Buster. I admire you and Vince as well!
  12. Am I virgin or not?

    Short answer: 2. Longer answer: Trying, I mean no disrespect but it really gets to me when someone asks for an opinion and proceeds to argue when they dont get the answer/opinion they want. You argued with me over P.M. and you're doing it again here. I agree with Poisson's post 110%. I'm surprised that you've had such experiences yet are so devastated when you meet a woman who's had 2 (!!) partners. The current girl you're seeing, 5 partners, seems comparable to you, give or take. TBH, it seems hypocritical on your part. Sorry if that came off blunt, but you asked for opinions. Please try to listen to what people are telling you. I'd hate for you to miss out on any more quality women because of this.
  13. Great post and some very valid points mentioned above. Another thing I'd like to point out, regarding Adriana and her divorce, is that she didn't appear to marry someone of comporable values. (When I say values, I mean "Faith" as well as wtm). That's a recipe for disaster. Adriana appears to take her faith seriously (from the little I've researches about her). When I researched her ex-husband a while back, I couldn't find anything suggesting he shared comparable values. IMHO, wtm can be worth it if you marry someone with similar, if not the same, values. There's a good chance her divorce had nothing to do with sex.
  14. Best Friends?

    HP, this is a really interesting scenario. Please keep us posted on what happens. My response: This is tough. There is no right or wrong answer, and the posts above have great points. Now, if I were the guy, I would want her to tell me. My answer would be completely different if this were some crush on a work friend or college buddy. Crushes come and go, and the word "friend" gets tossed around easily. Your situation is very different though I completely understand the "risk the friendship" argument. True friendship - like what you have w/ that guy - is a rarity, a treasure. However, let me share my perspective with you, maybe you'll find it interesting. In your specific situation, I think the friendship is already changed/at "risk". Regardless of whether you tell him, the feelings you now have changes the dynamic. Here's why: Let's say you don't tell him. What happens when the guy dates another girl and fills you in on ALL the details? Or better yet, asks you to meet her?! What happens if he gets a crush on another girl, and asks your opinion on her. Do you go along with the show, hurting yourself and deceiving himself in the process? Do you slowly withdraw contact with him (bad ideas IMHO)? Seriously, what do you do? I guess where I'm coming from is: "since things are already changed, why not tell him"? I can absolutely see the other side, but this is just my view. I have never encountered this. Mostly, the stories you hear are crushes on "friends", but not friends in the same sense as you and your guy friend. Here are some suggestions though 1. If you tell him - You're a writer. Me too. Whenever I have something important to share w/ someone (regardless of the medium in which I share it), I'll be prepared with notes so that I can communicate clearly. Maybe you want to do the same? Be sure to give him time to process (I'm assuming he has no clue and will be blindsided by this). 2. Pray Pray Pray - Most importantly, pray. If you already have, pray more. Be prepared for an answer, even if it's not the one you want. You will receive an answer. It might be through circumstances or other means. (One time I prayed and God instantly take away my feelings for a woman. It was like night and day. This has only happened once though) HP, I did have a question for you. I'm very curious. What made you be into him now? You've known him for such a long time. What changed? I don't mind if you don't respond, I'm just curious.