I am doing my best to follow God's Word, which is the primary reason I am waiting.
That having been said, I can't help but think that God intentionally tests/punishes/discourages those who follow Him.
I recognize that waiting is the right thing to do from a religious perspective, and the best all around choice, especially because of the possibility of STDs and pregnancy risks.
But I can't help but wondering if God is somehow punishing the people who follow His Word. I recognize that almost all of the unmarried women from the post-feminist world have sex with guys they are attracted to. I've heard all my life about how women stop having sex with their husbands. I look around and see the massive number of divorced people. All of the divorced men that I work with tell me not to get married. Ever. They've been financially destroyed. They lost all contact with their kids. All kinds of horror stories about the divorce/family courts, and predatory ex-wives.
I am one of the few guys who actually believes in marriage as an ideal. Most of the guys that I know don't want to risk it. They want the option of leaving their girlfriends if she ever stops having sex, or starts making too much drama.
I recognize that I am doing the right thing.
But I also realize that if I wasn't following God's teachings, I wouldn't have to worry about the sexless marriages, because I'd have no motive to get married. I wouldn't have to worry about losing everything in divorce court, because there wouldn't be a sexless wife to hold that power over me. I wouldn't risk massive financial loss because I would remain in control of my finances... I recognize that with the warped parody of civilization that we live in, casual sex makes the most sense for men in almost every area conceivable. It doesn't put your home at risk. It doesn't put your finances at risk. The only downside is the potential of the girlfriend getting pregnant.
I believe in marriage as the ideal. That is my religious belief, and I won't compromise. But I also recognize that from a purely logical, secular, point of view, keeping as much distance between yourself and your girlfriend makes more sense.
It almost feels like God is trying to test or punish me for choosing to follow Him. I won't allow myself to have sex outside of marriage because it is wrong. It results in too much pain, too many unwanted pregnancies, too many STDs, an inability to form loving connections...
But with everything considered... Single women having sex... Married women refusing sex... The divorce rate so high... The thought of losing everything... Marriage doesn't seem worth the risk either...
I feel like I am in a Catch-22... My religious beliefs telling me I can't have sex outside of marriage... And my potential wife telling me I can't have sex while married...
Is this really what God intended for marriage to look like for men who follow His teachings? Did He intentionally make men and women that incompatible?
I'm particularly looking for responses from other Catholics, and women regardless of their religion. But anybody is free to comment.