Noga

Hi! Please comment if you are in Golden California! I'm super-curious to find out if I'm not the only one???? Blessings, ~Noga

Such beauty-full advice, Jasmine! Yes:) Take the opportunity to learn what they see... This is *so* well-said, and shared with Love!

I do. I want to dive in DEEP. I want to create, develop, nurture, nourish and en-JOY an amazing bond that expands and strengthens over time, exponentially. I know for sure that this is possible. And I also know that it is literally what I (body, soul, mind, emotions...) was personally designed for!

P.S. DHZ, hope this helps even further: In choosing a coach, it's important to make sure you fit into their niche/specialty. To make sure that *you* are who they are talking about when they describe their clients. So that it's a good fit for you. Here is Sarah's page, that describes what an introverted alpha actually is: https://introvertedalpha.com/#a On her website, she describes him as: He is comfortable in his own skin. He has an air of quiet confidence. He adds value as a way of life. A True Alpha doesn’t need constant validation. So, if you really feel that this is you, then I'd say yes: Reach out to this coach, book a consultation with her, and be dedicated to the assignments she gives you! Hope this is all helpful!! Blessings and Good luck, ~Noga

(Something like this is one of the ways you will be able to find "her" - but ONLY if you apply yourself, and are willing to Stretch Outside of Your Comfort Zone.) I believe I know this coach. This is Sarah Jones, one of my colleagues. I've talked with her the phone a few years ago, when she was starting her business. My impression of her was really good. I'm also a coach (and healer, spiritual guide.) I agree that it all comes down to what you *do* when your coach is not there with you. However, the right teacher can and will help you see your blind spots. (Very important! Because you cannot see them, hence the name! And blind spots are generally the reasons for people not having success with goals.) However, the coach can only help you see your blind spots if you are willing to Look. I know from personal experience with my clients (hundreds of clients in dozens of countries, that I've worked with since the year 2000 - so, lots of experience) that it is Totally Possible to change patterns, and finally achieve success. BUT! The client HAS to do their homework. Otherwise nothing will change. Even with the best coaches. The client MUST be open-minded, and do the work, in order to have results. I had a client (in Los Angeles, CA) who is a wonderful man! Very successful in career, positive, great person, wonderful ethics, etc. He wanted to marry and have a family. But he was sooooooooo shy, he could not talk to a female. At all. He found me online (on the website that hosts the 4 books I've written) and reached out to me because he was interested in my coaching. He signed up for my initial consultation, we talked, and then he enrolled in my 3-month coaching program. He was very dedicated. I gave him homework assignments tailored to his personality and speaking style: reading assignments, as well as ways to practice talking with women. I "held his hand" so to speak, through a process of baby steps. He really applied himself! Which obviously makes all the difference. As well as the importance of choosing a good coach. One month after he graduated my program (just 4 months after he originally reached out to me for support) he met a lovely woman. They are now married, and have a 2-year old son. I like to keep in touch with my clients as time goes by; I talked with him a month ago. He is so happy! And he still refers friends to my coaching practice, because he loves the amazing results he himself experienced. In summary, it is definitely worth it to get a "dating coach" if you pick a good one - and if you do the work! Blessings, ~Noga

Just today, one of my "superiors" at work (I work at a body care department part-time) broke down crying when he was telling me that he had to explain to his son last night... that their step-father is dying from cancer. His son has already gone through many losses at his young age of 10, and is very attached to this step-father. I've been told that I have a uniquely "disarming" presence, and it's not uncommon for people's deepest, most tender feelings to come out when they are in my presence. As soon as he began to cry, he was very careful to move into an area where no other coworkers/customers could see him. He continued to talk with me, saying that he had been holding in his feelings for so long, and could not cry in front of his wife, because then she would cry. He was holding the burden of being the "man" for the whole entire family, all generations. I felt deeply honored that I could provide that space for him, to be a human being in addition to being a man. I believe we are all here to be with and for each-other. This is part of what I give into the world. I see no problem with a man crying. Men are human, too. Crying is a natural expression of relief, release, sadness, grief and loss. I am honored by a man's tears.

Welcome & Blessings!

This is sooooooo true. YES! When we start to love ourselves, we "become" beautiful in the eyes of others, because others are mirroring our self-love and self-acceptance. Crystal, congrats! This is gorgeous. Love and Blessings, ~Noga

Welcome and Blessings:)

I'm waiting to see if others comment to your post, voulaki726. For the time being, since I'm not in the category you asked to hear from... I am actually in Your shoes! But I just want to tell you that I really feel the struggle you are having. I have had the same struggle many times. It's really hard, so I feel for you/us. I do believe that it is possible to find a better match, one which will not be unappealing to you. (Have you tried talking with him about your feelings on this? Perhaps that could help open something up. Just an idea.) My heart extends towards you, and I feel your pain and struggle. Don't give up! Love and Blessings, ~Noga

The reason you label yourself as 'forever alone' is NOT the scarcity of waiters. There are plenty of women waiting. But you will need to look into yourself in order to develop into someone who is energetically attractive. Right now, you are pushing good women away. I agree with Chak. If you are looking for a duplicate of yourself... Well, this is not how relationship truly thrives. It does really pay off to find a complimentary partner, with whom each of you can grow and develop, as you love each-other. I also agree with Trying! When you made the comment about breasts having to be perfect, you sounded very judgmental. It's a total turn-off. Even to women with "perfect"breasts! In fact, you wrote that you are against circumcision. Well, if you have happened to be circumcised because of where you were born (and I would be very sorry about that - I also agree 100% with you that is is wrong to do to a baby) then you yourself could be viewed as "imperfect" to some women. Think about that. And you had no choice in what was done to you as a baby. Do you want to be judged for that?? It's the same level of judgement that you use on women who have "imperfect" breasts in your view. In summary, you may be repelling the very women who fit your criteria.

Welcome and Many Blessings, Eben! There are lots of great ways to stay connected on this site, so hope you will be joining us often, and contributing your views:) Blessings! Noga

I'm with Buster 100%.

Wow. I needed that. I really appreciate this video being posted. Thank you!! Sooooo good to see...

will smith (when he was single, obviously)

(I think that sometimes planning for plan b ... invites plan b. so I'm just not interested in it.)

This is a very deep question... with many questions that come from it... For me personally, this would be the end of the discussion. Adultery is like divorce. Just not planning for it. It is the one reason I would divorce. But it is beside the point: I do not plan on my husband doing this. Period. It takes a certain level of faith to step in this 100%. And it also takes intuition, to choose the right person who shares this 100% loyalty value. So, for me all the questions of how I would talk to him, if I would have to follow him around and babysit his every move for the rest of my life... is mute. I'm entering into a devoted marriage. What we focus on expands. That's just my personal take, for myself. In a very summarized fashion.

This is a beautiful letter. I resonate with much of it. (And I'm also really into Orgone, lucid dreaming, awareness expansion, etc.) Welcome and Many Blessings to you!

I really appreciate Chak's kindness... there are probably many more lovely people on this site, and it's hard for me to think of all the names. Also, I find myself not wanting to leave anyone out! So, having a bit of "writer's block" at the moment Blessings to ALL! ~Noga

Hi Peeps! I'm en~Couraged by this site, so thanks for everyone who's here! Sometimes I feel like I'm the only one with my values. Which doesn't have to be a bad thing. It's just that I really want to meet my husband. So, it's amazingly valuable to *see* that there are others who share this intention - Thank you! Living in the golden and gorgeous state of California, I wonder: Since there are so many practices that are popular here that are uninteresting to me (such as open marriages, poly-"amory" & many kinds of serial intimacy, multiple lovers, and people who are into changing sex partners every day or week...) It makes it hard to know who in my own area shares my values. Those who are promoting and living a more promiscuous lifestyle tend to be more vocal, in my experience. Sharing and bragging to coworkers, etc. Chastity and reserving intimacy for marriage is a very intimate, personal and private topic. So, many people don't wear it on their sleeves. I just wonder if there are any others on this site also here in CA??? (I'm in the north - Bay Area, CA.) Thanks in advance for connecting and sharing!!

I like your flag idea It would definitely make it easier to find people:)

This is a topic that touches my heart a lot, too. It's amazing the assumptions people make. I do find ways to express myself, to those who are intelligent, sensitive, and respectful. All in all, the concept of "older" virgins sounds so silly to me. We are only older because of the fact that we're not married yet. In many cultures, we would have help (from intelligent elders, matchmakers, community rituals around meeting partners...) but in the modern usa, we are left by ourselves... and even those who do have sex before marriage also express the same desires/longings: wanting to meet their life partner. But the support for that is not built into our culture any more. It's something I've been thinking a lot about...

Beautiful. I love the way you said that... My actions affect my testimony as a whole. Yes! Blessings

* Welcome * !! You are beautiful. Glad you joined! Blessings, ~Noga

Sadly, I don't think they helped at all. I just came to it because it feels good and right for me personally. The rest of my family does not share my values. And I've been criticized by some, because I am waiting for my husband. So, it's been a very solo process. But I still feel good about being true to myself. I don't do it to please family or anyone else. This is who I am.