TheCrowing

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Everything posted by TheCrowing

  1. Okay, let's hear them! Name that one criticism of WTM that really makes your eyes roll, blood boil, etc. Mine is without a doubt the following: "Why would you buy a car without test driving it?" The whole analogy is ridiculous. Comparing people to cars, placing sex above all else in marriage, and most of all... acting as if poor and/or inexperienced sex is a permanent condition that can never be improved with time. Sometimes I play along with it though, responding with something like "Why put extra miles on a car that you know you're going to buy if you don't have to?" They usually don't say much after that lol.
  2. "I've been really tryyyyyyin', baby. Tryin' to hold back this feeling for sooo long" Okay, so what's everyone's opinion of having music playing during boom-boom time on your wedding night, when the time has finally come? Too corny? Maybe. But if you're staying at a hotel or some place public, it could help give you privacy, if you know what I mean. If you're in favor of it, do you have any song(s) in mind? Lol. This should be a fun thread.
  3. Hey again, everyone!

    Whoa...Hey there! Some of you will remember me, some won't. Can't believe it's been over a year since I've logged in. 2015 was an interesting year for me, to say the least...! This will be short and sweet. I just wanted you guys to know that you still inspire me, EVERY SINGLE DAY! I really missed you all. Sure there are some differences amongst us, but at the end of the day we are all united under a common cause, and that is WTM! That's all that matters, friends. I won't be the active poster I used to be, but I told myself to still make a point to stop in periodically. I like to think of this place as an oasis in a huge worldly internet desert. You can journey away, but you still need to make a stop every now and then! I really hope everyone is doing well! Peace, Eric (TC)
  4. I don't even have the words for this. There are some decent arguments out there for not waiting till marriage, but this one... The generalizations are out of control. Out. Of. Control. Some highlights: The notion that men who don't want sex before marriage aren't sexual beings, as in they don't desire sex at all, and aren't capable of attracting good women. Most of the guys I know who waited till marriage have very attractive wives. I guess they don't apply? I've noticed this article operates under one particular premise: That all humans (women especially) rely solely on their animal instincts when choosing their SO, and not at all on their intellect or emotional convictions. This is pretty offensive. The science of sex is never absolute, and hardly the same for every person, man or woman. Sure there are basic mating principles, but to act like they perfectly govern the actions of every person is false, and like I said before, offensive. Yeah, the pretending that 26 year-old virgins don't exist thing. He tries to act like he was kidding, but I don't think he was, unfortunately. My favorite highlight, however, was this: "Nice guys" who wait for sex aren't sexual creatures (again, they don't desire sex), therefore women's genes won't survive and he'll in turn give the woman sons and daughters that are weak. What in the actual hell? He also mentioned more than once that couples who marry early to (presumably) consummate end up mostly in divorce soon after. So much for the substantial proof that couples who wait divorce less, heh. Probably just another case of one trying to rationalize and justify their own obsession with sex. Judging by his other articles, he seems to be yet another self-proclaimed "pick-up artist" blogging their life away. It happens. You know how I know this is REALLY bad though? The fact that some of our more liberal members here have shot it down.
  5. At Home With Mom

    One has every right to desire a significant other who doesn't live at home. In this thread alone, however, I've read misconceptions that those who live at home lack maturity, self-sufficiency, and haven't figured life out. Really quite unfair to assume such things about people. I'm someone who lived on their own hours away from home for all of college, was self-sufficient in every way possible (no financial help from parents at all), but who now is temporarily living at home (with a full-time job) due to vast student loans. Living at home doesn't equate to not being readily capable of self-sufficiency given the proper circumstances. There's other factors too. I recently was in a long-term relationship, and while a lot of guys in my situation would have made the jump right from living at home to living with their girlfriend and splitting rent (which I could afford), this obviously was not an option for me (WTM). And when you're not the typical guy it can be challenging to find a compatible male roommate. Also, just throwing this out there, but someday parents will be gone. When that happens, will I really regret the few extra years I spent with them and the additional memories made? Hell no. If someone is lazy and content to live at home their entire lives, fine, but for some it is merely a holding pattern until things fall into place. In no way does that convey a lack of character.
  6. Celebrity Crush?

    Nobody here's mentioned Molly Quinn yet. Good god almighty... Redheads are fascinating to me. They're rare, which makes an extremely attractive one even more rare.
  7. Favorite Horror Movies

    Believe it or not "The Ring" is the only movie that has legitimately scared me, of course I was like 16 when I first saw it. I don't go near wells anymore! On that note, I find psychological-horror type movies to be far more chilling than flash-horror (or whatever you want to call it), aka the movies that make you jump. Also, I can't name any specific movies with this other than House on Haunted Hill, but there's something about haunted hospitals that gets me. There should be more movies with such a setting!
  8. Older women???

    Depends on how much older, of course, but I've been on a couple dates with women in their early 30s (I'm 28), and found that it's not much different than going on a date with someone in their early 20s, and on a similar note I don't really feel anything different lol. Of course the older a woman is, the more likely it is they'll have past marriages and/or children, which is kind of a deal breaker for me and presumably for most single, never-married guys. There is something about a single, mature woman in her early 30s that I find attractive though.
  9. That's fine, continue to single me out, I can handle it. It's as if every rebuttal to my argument(s) has been done with tons of respect. Ya'll can't be serious. If you guys REALLY think I disrespected Dianna or BF before they each disrespected me then I have no idea what to tell you. Now is it necessarily right to disrespect someone because they disrespected you? No, but if you're going to give lectures on respect, there's several people that need to hear it. I still don't know if I'd even call what I said to Dianna "disrespect" to begin with. And as far as what I said to BF, I don't really think it was worse than what she first spouted off towards me. I don't know how I can tell you that what I said was a reaction from people making things personal with me and yet you end up only telling me to behave. None of this is anything but perception. You simply cannot get a true read on someone based on what they say online, so if ya'll want to think I'm a cocky, arrogant, disrespecting jerk based on me sticking up for my beliefs and simply responding to disrespect towards me, then fine.
  10. Totally agree with this, which is exactly why I felt the need to post over there to begin with. Maybe fighting fire with fire wasn't the right thing to do in this case, but I felt compelled to make a stand, and I still maintain that I was no less respectful toward her (Dianna) than she was toward me. She attacked my lifestyle, so I let her know about it. She then quickly dismissed my arguments and threatened to ban me for saying some harmless word, which is showing about as little respect as you can show someone, so I gave her none in return, and she banned me from her site. End of story. I sincerely hope people will get the whole story before just automatically deciding that I'm the bad guy, which BF obviously feels that I am, because of course, she's friends with that author. Don't worry, I'm still leaving the site for the time being. I just wanted to clear some things up.
  11. Whether or not there are "answers" to my questions somewhere on her blog doesn't change the fact that her article was FULL of misconceptions about waiting, virginity, and purity movements. In fact, I don't see how she could have somewhere dispelled all of these misconceptions without better articulating herself in the present article. Uninterested in real discussion? Okay.
  12. No, but other people on that article have been banned. Why does it matter if it's every person, or if they're from WTM? I noticed she didn't address about 85% of the points I made to her. It just looks bad on her part. She's the one with a reputation to uphold, not me.
  13. I maintain respect until someone makes it personal, then all bets are off.
  14. account delete option?

    EDIT: I'm going to try extremely hard not logging in for a very long time. Months probably. No point in having to re-create everything someday. Thanks and farewell for now.
  15. I just now picked up on this. HAHAHA @ "crazy" being an able-ist slur. Are you fricking serious? So what, I used "crazy" to describe parents who shove things down their kids' throats, in order to make a point. Not only that, but this obviously would be a sentiment they agree with. Further proof that they had no interest in even focusing on the topic at hand. Oh My God! Screw this bull. I've been trying so hard to refrain from going political, but things like this are why for the most part I can't stand liberalism. As if I purposefully meant to be prejudice against those with mental illnesses. LOL okay. Give me a break. Oh and feminism is a great idea, but I've almost never seen it carried out in a prudent fashion, and you're no exception, BF. Had to get that off my chest too. I'm done with this site. So disappointed in the last couple months here.
  16. Good posts. There's a noticeable gaffe in her reasoning, that you can point out if you wish to (I'm banned lol), but she argues in her original article that abstinence is okay as long as one takes the time to arrive at the choice for personal reasons. However, it's pretty clear in her comments that she simply does not condone abstinence at all, for anyone, made very evident by her using the most popular criticism in the book: lack of sexual compatibility! Haha. She is now arguing against abstinence itself, not the method at which one arrives at being abstinent, which is what she claimed originally. I told myself I'd stop posting about this. I'm trying! Lol.
  17. Fair enough, although I don't feel WTM.org is the best example. We have tons of different-minded people here who happen have one goal in common, which is a good thing. A lot of waiters here, but also a lot of disagreements on so many things. I agree about the safe spaces though. Perhaps she should require people to actually register with the site in order to post, which most of the time would mean she'd be getting comments from those who enjoy what she writes, instead of being able to post as a guest. If she's trying to write strictly as a means of support, she'd be less likely to receive criticism if it required one making an account. Still a bit disappointing though.
  18. Just one more post in this thread and I'll be done. As someone else on here pointed out to me in private message, it definitely raises a red flag when you can't go into a thread and respectfully debate someone without them pulling out the censorship card and banning you right away. To me, it's a pretty tell-tale sign of an insecure author. Most really good authors welcome criticism as a means to refine and better their own arguments, and that couldn't be further from what I experienced here. Very disappointing. Anyways, carry on.
  19. Good points. I'm trying to keep my arguments totally non-religious, but obviously her article isn't totally non-religious, so I'm glad you chimed in. Things like this always end in stalemate, but I just couldn't find it in myself to let this go without pointing out all of her misconceptions that offend me as a waiter. I clearly need a life, lol.
  20. Hi, I'm McKenzie

    Welcome, and people have posted much longer intros, so no worries.
  21. I am engaged!

    Congrats! Did he do it with a very large moon in the backdrop?
  22. So this is what I wrote in her comments... "27 year-old waiter here. Male virgin. Took the pledge when I was 17. Been a long, hard road, but the end is in sight. I am here to respectfully point out some misconceptions in this article, which there are quite a few to be honest. Before I get started though, I read your "About Me" section. I too have degrees in both Theology and English. Odd coincidence, I guess. Haha. 1. "Narratives of purity" say you're either a virgin or a slut? Sounds like a large generalization to me. Most purity pledge systems recognize second-virginity or simply waiting from "that point on". Sounds like there is plenty of middle ground to me. In almost every case I've seen churches and other groups promoting abstinence fully embrace those who have slipped up. By simply taking a pledge of abstinence, which results in perhaps feeling motivated and good about yourself, it doesn't automatically mean that shame has to be the reciprocating feeling of not following through on said pledge. Now, if you think the shame occurs because the nature of "purity culture" implies that sex is evil, wrong, and that it's wrong to feel sexual, then you're misunderstanding the point. The message that comes with just about every purity pledge is that sex is beautiful, but only appropriate in the context of marriage. If you happen not to agree with this, then you're totally making the wrong argument here. 2. How many people who choose abstinence really walk around feeling "holier than thou?" Or project such attitudes? I think this is mostly about how non-waiters PERCEIVE waiters a lot of the time, which falls on their shoulders, not on the shoulders of said waiters. 3. "You have not won any battle by making it to your wedding day as a virgin - you have merely managed to keep an arbitrary promise." I have no idea if you waited/are waiting or not, but this at least sounds like someone who hasn't experienced waiting first-hand, or at least someone who hasn't been at it for years. If you have, then I'm sorry it isn't/wasn't a battle for you, but it sure is for the majority of us. 4. Abstinence is merely a choice? Disagree, it's definitely a lifestyle. One likely won't get very far treating it like any other choice they make, not in today's world. Speaking from experience. 5. Why not at least start kids down the right path (and yes, it is the right path) by introducing them to the idea of abstinence? Most fall away from it and live what you would probably consider to be "normal" lives. I think your notion of shame, in this case, is overstated. There's enough approval for having pre-marital sex these days to more than offset any supposed "shame" that "purity culture" brings forth. There's plenty of solace to be had if it doesn't work out, believe me. If you simply disagree with "planting the purity seed" in a kid's head to begin with...then kids who may not know better, i.e. kids in their early teens, shouldn't be having sex anyway. Surely you can agree with that. By the time they reach their late teens, most know what they're getting themselves into and/or what they've gotten themselves into, whether they follow through with it or not. If they come to decide that it's not for them, most don't face any negative consequences by walking away from abstinence, other than the stuff that often results from pre-marital sex. 6. About the negatives effects of abstinence, which do you think has created more negative consequences throughout the years? Abstinence or pre-marital sex? You absolutely know the answer to this. 7. Finally, it saddens me to see someone, especially a Christian, criticize something like this. You're tearing down a system (and lifestyle) that has done far more good than harm, and something that doesn't really affect non-waiters at all (unless they're dating a waiter). It's just not cool when people write negatively about lifestyles that may be contrary to their own. Not accusing you of this, but I think it's relevant to this topic to point out that many people resent those who make good choices in life because of how it makes them feel about themselves. Why do you think so many people hate Tim Tebow? Because he's made good choices in his life, and that in turn makes people feel worse about themselves. On the contrary, why do people love the Jerry Springer Show? Because it's filled with people who have turmoil in their lives. People watch, their ego increases. How else do you think such a poor quality show could survive so long? Lol. Anyways, that's my 2 cents. I'm sure you'll write this long reply of why I'm wrong, which is fine, but obviously being the age I am and being as far into this as I am, I sincerely hope your goal isn't to persuade me to believe anything that you do. Because that ship sailed years ago. Just like the purpose of my post isn't to change what you believe, but rather is simply me doing my "duty" as a veteran waiter and someone who has fully subscribed to this lifestyle."
  23. Random Thoughts

    LMAO, is that Duke saying "Throw the damn towel" in Rocky IV? I'm probably the only one here that caught that. I love the Rocky saga lol.