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  1. Today
  2. I am very interested in this topic. I have 2 kids and I would like to marry a guy who is younger than me. He doesn't have kids also. He doesn't have a problem but his family is against our relationship. They say that I am overweight. I am planning to undergo a liposuction from a clinic in Windsor, Ontario. It is not for his family, but for my mental satisfaction. Hope we would be 'a made for each other couple'.
  3. I know how you feel @DHZ. It's hard when you can't find someone... Keep talking to women. I can say with confidence that this is something that gets much easier with practice. Try to find women with similar interests. I don't want to go too far off topic, but I feel the need to respond to what others have said in this thread. I think some of the other posters are way off-base with criticizing your hobbies... I am well aware of the German Catholic saying ("Paint a demon on your wall, and one appears")... But games like Magic, and even the somewhat controversial Dungeons and Dragons have nothing to do with the occult... I stay away from devil related things, but I think that people who attack you for a fictitious card game, or for listening to certain types of music are way off the mark, especially if you are not interested in the occult... I can't speak for others on this board, but under Catholicism, watching or listening to any type of movie or music isn't a sin per se... The most Catholicism will say is that something can be a Near Occasion of Sin... Deliberately leading you into temptation... If somebody is a violent drunk who walks into a bar, it isn't a sin because he went into the bar. It is an Occasion of Sin, because he put himself into the temptation of becoming a violent drunk... It's the same thing with watching violent or sexy movies... If it makes you have violent or sexual tendencies, it is an Occasion of Sin because it leads you into temptation. But just watching a movie isn't in and of itself a sin... This also reminds me of the fundamentalist Christians who like to confuse Wiccan people with "witches"... A Wiccan is somebody who worships nature. A "witch" is somebody who worships the Christian devil. Big difference, yet they use the terms interchangeably...
  4. I know how you feel I'm 29. I just dated two men who were both Christian and we talked about marriage, but both relationships didn't work out so far. 1. If you feel like this is a God issue and God is holding out on you, (which is what I feel) you could ask God to reveal to you what it is you need to work on (If anything), or give you more patience. 2. If you feel like this is simply a matter of finding a wife, switch up your routine, try new things or develop new interests to meet new people. AKA go to the store in the morning vs at night etc, if you shop online normally like gamers generally do, go in person etc etc. Good luck I'm right there with you.
  5. I think the first thing you should figure out is what your definition of virginity is. If it is the dictionary definition, then yes, you can still consider yourself a virgin because you haven't had actual intercourse yet. If you think a person loses his or her virginity when they engage in other intimate acts that isn't actual sex, then unfortunately you wouldn't be able to call yourself a virgin anymore. I am a very technical person, and so from my own personal perspective, I would still see you as a virgin. I personally feel like dictionary definitions become useless when people start adding on additional meanings of what a word is to them. If people made up their own interpretations of words, despite what the dictionary defines them as, then language and communication as we know it would cease because there are no agreed upon meanings of words anymore, and that is essential for proper communication. But I digress. I think you could still call yourself a virgin, but with purity that has been compromised. From my perspective, engaging in other intimate acts that are not actual sex does not constitute a loss of virginity, but it does constitute a reduction in purity. But here's the encouraging part: you still have purity left . You still have the purity of inexperience with actual intercourse that you still can save for your spouse! I'm a Christian, and the way I see it is that actual sex is the physical act (in addition to the spiritual act of the marriage vows before God) that makes a couple become "one" (I mean, without getting too graphic, if you think about it, the man's and woman's part were designed for such a fit). You still haven't done that, and that is something to be thankful for! So while you've done the "other stuff", you still have that most important intimate act for her . (And by the way, even though all of us should still avoid doing the "other stuff" to maintain our purity, I do commend you that despite going as far as you did, that you were still able to stay strong and hold back from taking that final step, especially in the heat of the moment which I'm sure is very hard for men.) Ultimately, I think you should focus on being thankful for what you still do have, rather than what you don't have, and that might help you to feel better about yourself. This mindset might also help with any girl you meet who's done things similar to what you've done. If you can view things from the perspective that (if she also has done "everything but") she still has something saved for her future husband, then that might help you to be accepting of her. I do agree with Vince in that whatever standard you set for others, you must also set for yourself. So if you can't accept a girl who's gone beyond kissing, for example, then you shouldn't expect the girl to accept that you've gone further than kissing. I also don't think it's fair to "demand" that the girl absolutely must have a past that is less than yours. Since you say that, "my mate having a past is still something I can't handle emotionally," think of what your mate will have to handle when she learns of your past. If you meet a girl who has a past like yours and are worried that you can't handle it emotionally (perhaps because of worry that she'll compare, or perhaps because you'll imagine what she did with the other guy), here's something you can try because this is a mindset that I tried to have since, as a virgin, I have dated non virgin guys before. When I was with these men, and when I learned of how many girlfriends they've had and some of the things they did with them, I naturally worried about how I would compare. So what I tried to do is figure out in my head what I could do as a wife if we were to get married that would outdo whatever these other girls did with my man. That way, there would be no comparison since I would be his best. I don't know if this will help you or not, but I just thought I'd mention it since that "outdoing" sort of mindset was what I used for certain things back when I used to date non virgin men. Best wishes in your search for "the one"!
  6. Hi, My marriage was in the month of March. I’m planning for a honeymoon trip. As there are many places to select from, it is so confusing. So I thought of asking those people who have visited some beautiful places. Can someone help me select a good place? Recently, one of my friends told me about a place called Barbados. And I have not visited this place before. And I’m totally unaware of the attractions and facilities of this place. Has anyone visited this place? How is it for a honeymoon trip? Need to find some good honeymoon resorts in Barbados. Need your suggestions. Specifically, I heard two things about this place: 1. Barbados garden - where we can see the vivid colors of the local flora. 2. Marine life - which stands out So, I was so excited to visit the place. How are the expenses in this region? Any idea? Waiting for your suggestions, feedback, and replies. It will be greatly appreciated. Thanks in advance.
  7. Yesterday
  8. I would try and work through accepting a girl who has the same level of experience as you. Strictly speaking, it sounds like you still have something to save for marriage. I think it's on the level to go for girls with the same level of experience. But, maybe since you have an extensive past, you would be able to accept a girl who has gone all the way. Now, if you want a girl who is close to totally inexperienced, that's probably a bit more thorny. Like you said, you're experienced. It's pretty tough to demand she have no past when you have one. Is it strictly speaking hypocritical? I'm not sure. It's not as though you're saying it is okay for you to have premarital sex but not okay for others to. People bring different things into a relationship, so I'm not sure if it's wrong to want her to bring something into the relationship you don't have (sexual inexperience) since it's likely you'll be bringing something into the relationship she doesn't have. Would it be hypocritical to want a partner who has a good sense of humor if you don't have one? Maybe some would argue it is. I won't say a non-virgin demanding a virgin isn't a bit unsettling. It probably is. Maybe try and think through why you want a virgin/sexually inexperienced girl. If it's that you want the experience to be new for the both of you, that's largely went out the window already since you have a past. Dictionary definition sex could be new for both of you, but how significant is that when everything else has already been done? Is it insecurity? That's something lots of people, including non-waiters, are able to work through. I don't think spouses feel unhappy with their husband/wife because they're thinking, "Darn, I should have married that other person I slept with."
  9. I strongly believe we need to hold ourselves to the same standard that we hold others by. Not trying to sound harsh, but if you have done "everything but..." and you are questioning your own virginity then I don't think you have legitimate grounds to demand a virgin. Now if you happen to end up with a virgin, then awesome. But to actually demand one? I don't see how justify making that a requirement without seeming a bit hypocritical. Now yes, there is a grey area in that everyone's definition of a virgin is different. But we have the tendency to downplay our own mistakes in the past and embellish that of everyone else. I'm not saying that to shame you in any way, but to give you some perspective. You are basically asking how you can legitimately make virginity a dealbreaker when you acknowledge you may not be one yourself. Your past is not the end of the world and neither is anyone else who has a sexual past. In light of your own past, try to imagine yourself wanting to be with a virgin girl but you're afraid of what she might think of you based on your past. Wouldn't you hope she wouldn't judge you for your past mistakes? Try extending that mindset to a girl who may feel the same way if she was hoping to seek your affections. It might be fine if you required a girl who didn't have vaginal sex but has done "everything but" But maybe to help you think about things more deeply is how would you feel about a girl who has done "everything but?" Would you consider her a virgin? You can't say no to her but yes about your own self. You have to apply a standard that is consistent for yourself and for other people.
  10. Hi all!!! Virgin from Mexico

    No lo se rick parece falso :V. Welcome
  11. What would you do if...

    Well, I'm 37. I never thought I'd be waiting this long. However, I still will not change. I think we all go through stages of consideration, at least most do. I have, but I always come back to this...this is who I am, I want this for many reasons, and if I never marry? Well, I'm just happy that I've finally learned to accept that possibility and have found other things that make me happy.
  12. So, I think I may have made a topic a bit ago about a slip up I had. I was going through a serious lack of faith and had a case of the eff-its. In a previous relationship, my partner had a sexual past and in contrast to my lack of one, It tore me up inside. Fast forward, we're not longer together and I met this girl who I ended Up doing a lot more than I wanted to with. In my lack of faith and belief I would find someone who was on the same level as me, I didn't say no, she was a bit manipulative but yeah. Long story short, I ended up doing everything but the dictionary definition of actual intercourse, but yeah, hit pretty much all the other bases and I felt horrible when we broke up. Although we never had actual sex, it's a Grey area if I can even still call myself a virgin. But the whole thing is, I did have some feelings for her. I found out she had a one night stand after we broke up and then I learned that my mate having a past is still something I can't handle emotionally but now with me debatably still being a virgin, is something I may have to deal with which worries me. How can I demand my mate be a virgin when I might not be one in her eyes. So yeah, advice please guys?
  13. Last week
  14. If you change men/guys to women/girls then the story could have been one I wrote. Except for the older man part. Older women hit on me all the time. I think Geraldine is spot on in saying God protects us from people who would do us harm. IE: guys who comment on how physical beauty relates on how people experience partnership. A lot of people who have low standards for maintaining their health also have low standards regarding sex/drugs/alcohol and other things so it's only natural that things the world says people need to feel complete come easier to them. It might not even be that. He could have been making an observation about only physical traits society associates with beauty, makeup, attire, build, etc and completely ignored women who were beautiful in be chaste, kindness, compassion, or other areas a Christian would recognize. Sometimes it isn't even the other person but ourselves. I look back at some of the women I really wanted to approach and never did, a lot of times I can recognize that I was nowhere near being in a position to entertain a relationship so failing in that area wasn't really a failure at all. This is a really good Psalm as it specifically points God's willingness to protect us not only from sin, but from people who are sinners. It's an important distinction as it represents the external and internal struggle Christians experience. Psalm 141King James Version (KJV) 141 Lord, I cry unto thee: make haste unto me; give ear unto my voice, when I cry unto thee. 2 Let my prayer be set forth before thee as incense; and the lifting up of my hands as the evening sacrifice. 3 Set a watch, O Lord, before my mouth; keep the door of my lips. 4 Incline not my heart to any evil thing, to practise wicked works with men that work iniquity: and let me not eat of their dainties. 5 Let the righteous smite me; it shall be a kindness: and let him reprove me; it shall be an excellent oil, which shall not break my head: for yet my prayer also shall be in their calamities. 6 When their judges are overthrown in stony places, they shall hear my words; for they are sweet. 7 Our bones are scattered at the grave's mouth, as when one cutteth and cleaveth wood upon the earth. 8 But mine eyes are unto thee, O God the Lord: in thee is my trust; leave not my soul destitute. 9 Keep me from the snares which they have laid for me, and the gins of the workers of iniquity. 10 Let the wicked fall into their own nets, whilst that I withal escape.
  15. Hey lovely Hirax, I really feel you...and I understand how you might feel....because as women, we really were meant to feel cherished, desired and seen as beautiful. That' s how God has designed us. And the husband God wants to give us will do all those things to us: he will cherish us, desire us and find us beautiful... I don't know if you're a believer but...I am... and will answer from this perspective Biblically speaking, Jesus is our fiancé and spiritually He is the One who cherishes us, desires us and sees us as beautiful (we are the bride of Christ) I understand you might feel confused about this, but remember that God wants to protect you from the wrong kind of attention...so sometimes, if you feel ignored by guy, see this as a protection from God who will draw to you the right guy at the right moment... there's nothing wrong with you I'm not sure that I have helped, but I've tried In the videos below they explain best my point of view
  16. What did you want be when you grew up

    I wanted to be an art teacher, but I still do teaching, just not art.
  17. I am 22 and I am never approached by men. I live in America where men are notorious for approaching women. Yet, strangers (both men and women) tell me that I am beautiful/pretty. I talked to a guy and he assumed I had a boyfriend, when I said no, he was in shock. He said I am a very beautiful girl and that he sees ugly women with bfs all the time. Yet, I am confused as to why men never seem to approach me in public anywhere or ask me out? Only sometimes guys look at me but nothing else happens. I have only been approached maybe one time in public like 5 years ago by an older guy who told I was beautiful. Not even creepy or weird guys approach me but I don't go to bars or clubs. Do any other women have this problem of being told they are attractive but not approached by men? What is wrong with me if I am supposedly pretty but no guys are approaching me?
  18. What is your favorite Bible Scripture?

    I love lots of words from the bible. Still, my favorite bible scriptures are psalms 23:6 and John 17:4.
  19. Hi, newbie from Canada

    Hi all, Thanks a ton for accepting me to this forum. I'm from Canada. I'm a businessman. I have just married and started my new life. Need your prayers. So happy to join this forum. Found this forum online and found some really interesting topics here. Would like to discuss on the different matters and learn many things from the people here. As I'm so passionate about social activities, would like to get involved in more of the discussion and talks here. Looking forward to a great time. Cheers! Thanks in advance
  20. Hello

    Welcome!
  21. Can't enjoy novels anymore

    Lol, I like romance. I guess I can't complain. It comes with the territory, I suppose. Their idea of romance might not be the same as mine. I agree about feeling alienated. It can be lonely. Now, that I'm thinking about my future more, I'm not sure of how I'm going to find another waiter. Starting to worry.
  22. Hello

    New to the site, didn't know there were so many people who share similar beliefs as me. Looking forward to talking to you guys.
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